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Second Worse Drug in Existence
Alcohol (Vodka)
by Psychonaut
Citation:   Psychonaut. "Second Worse Drug in Existence: An Experience with Alcohol (Vodka) (exp49165)". Erowid.org. Feb 5, 2011. erowid.org/exp/49165

 
DOSE:
  oral Alcohol - Hard

BODY WEIGHT: 67 kg


At the time of writing I am still recovering from my horrendous ordeal. Over 24 hours later I still have no desire to eat anything. I am not anti-drugs in any way. I frequently smoke hashish (without tobacco as nicotine makes me feel sick) and have done salvia divinorum and herbal ecstasy. I am currently researching 'magic mushrooms' as I feel I am ready to try them. I believe that people should have the right to try what they like, and be free from incorrect anti-drug propoganda from the government and other globalistic evil societies. I find it ironic that the drugs that cause the most problems (alcohol and nicotine) are legal in almost every country worldwide. Anyway, on to the experience...

I have tried alcohol in small amounts before, at parties and at home, but never have I been 'really drunk'. I recieve a call from my girlfriend and she asks me to come drinking with her and her friends. I usually do not go in for this sort of thing, but wish to see her, as I have not seen her for a few days. I accept, the kids I am going with are all younger than me. When I tell them that I have hash with me they seem to become nervous, and I pretend I am only joking, to put their minds at rest. I never drink and smoke at the same time anyway, as alcohol diminishes the subtle effects of the magic smoke, so it doesn't matter.

(T+00hrs)We reach the old warehouse where one of the kids opens his rucksack. He offers me a can but I decline. Then he produces a litre of vodka. They all try some but say it burns their throats. To prove them wrong I drink half the bottle in one go. It doesn't burn.

(T+30mins) Things get bad. I had no idea that I would get this drunk. It was a stupid thing to do I know, but I learnt my lesson. Suddenly my girlfriend is on me. I immensly enjoy her company. After an hour or so, everyone goes outside so we can have some privacy. I realise that I love her.

(T+2hrs) Everyone returns. I become angry. On of the kids is trying it on with my girlfriend. She rejects him and I resist the urge to punch his face in. I am normally very peaceful, but this anger scares me. It becomes hard to focus. I believe the wall is looking at me. I punch it. It doesn't hurt so I punch it again, and then again. Someone stops me. My hand is bleeding fairly badly.

(T+3hrs) I get sick. My girlfriend is just as drunk as I am, yet she helps me. I can see blood in my vomit and what I think are chunks of flesh. We all decide to leave. We stagger to a nearby fast food restraunt and go inside. My girlfriend and I sit down, I
Knock over a chair in the process. The other kids buy food. I go to the bathroom and get sick again. I look at myself in the mirror. I am horrified. There is blood all over my clothes. My skin is pale and my eyes are red. I look like a heroin abuser, or some sort of hooligan.

(T+3hrs 30mins) My father arrives. I kiss my girlfriend and leave her. I get into the car. It is dark so he doesn't suspect anything. I am sure he wouldn't mind if I explained to him but I don't. As soon as we get home I go upstairs and lie down on my bed. There are three people inside my head. They are all arguing. Eventually, I fall into an uneasy sleep.

Summary: For me, alcohol is a drug which doesn’t alter consciousness; rather it diminishes that consciousness which already exists. Objects remain objects, yet they are filled with a certain malevolent quality. It is destructive rather than constructive. It makes it impossible for a man to make good decisions. It fuels anger. From now on I think I shall expand my mind, and stick to psychedelics, instead of destroying it with alcohol.

Exp Year: 2005ExpID: 49165
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Feb 5, 2011Views: 6,918
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Alcohol - Hard (198) : Overdose (29), Difficult Experiences (5), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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