Citation: RoadtoEuphoria. "Alone in a Room Full of People: An Experience with Cocaine (exp49161)". Erowid.org. Oct 1, 2017. erowid.org/exp/49161
What a Disappointment
I have been looking forward to trying this drug for some time. After a couple of drinks and I was ready. The more experienced coke user had cut me a line and I snorted. The nasal passage went a bit numb, my gums also, after rubbing the remains of coke into them.
So there I was waiting for something to happen (this should technically have taken a second to happen), but nothing did! Sure I felt more chatty, but I needed to do another line, and then another. It was only after the first 5 lines, that I started feeling extremely confident, I wanted to talk to everyone, I thought they were all wonderful people in the place... Until I started a conversation. It seemed like everyone had nothing interesting to say, they were all boring and I was just so much better than everyone.
I went and sat on my own, looking around the room, thinking 'The people are lame, I hate these people'. Now, normally, I'm a very people person and to have these thoughts was quite shocking, but at a time I felt perfectly justified for making sly comments and attacks at everyone's flaws and felt great for doing so.
A lot more lines later, I started having some very confused episodes, like when someone talked to me it felt like I was somewhere else. At a place for better people. Instead of the social buzz I had expected, I found myself sitting in the corner on my own, wishing for everyone to go and die. I was depressed, because I felt I had nothing in common with anyone, I wanted to talk, but no one to talk to. The phrase 'Alone in a room full of people' fit perfectly the situation, but I kept doing more and more lines, I just craved it, until eventually I passed out.
The morning after came the comedown, which actually wasn't that bad, apart from few mood swings, but I have had a craving to do the drug again. You know, like you crave chocolate, like something I need, otherwise I'll get pissed off.
With pills it was different, I just wanted that awesome euphoria feeling, but I didn't crave it in any way, I mean, I wouldn't feel shittier, if I didn't have any. It's pretty weird to have the cravings, just watch out for that.
Basically, the whole experience was a big disappointment. There was no definite head buzz, there was no way of telling precisely when the effects started happening, it didn't feel like that drugged up out of this world feeling, and all it did was left me craving for more, even though I hated the experience. So yeah, coke sucks!
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