Citation: Timonium. "Creepy and Terrifying: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (20x extract) (exp48362)". Erowid.org. Jan 3, 2008. erowid.org/exp/48362
I am compelled to write this experience report in hope that others may avoid a bad or tragic situation by not making the same mistakes that I did. This is for those who may be wanting to try Salvia for the first time. Specifically for those that may be smoking Salvia in the form of an extract.
Before we get to the experience, let me provide a little background about myself. I consider myself to be a fairly experienced psychonaut, particularly in regard to psilocybin mushrooms. I enjoy and derive the most pleasure and learning from very deep experiences. I dose very heavy. Just under a quarter ounce (about 7 grams dried) is my base dosage. I am no stranger to somewhat edgy or scary trips. Because my approach and mindset is very stable, these trips are largely no scarier than say a good fun roller coaster. Anyway, just wanted to let you readers know, that while I am writing about my very first Salvia experience, it is coming from someone who is familar with other-worldly experiences.
After having done some online research I thought that I might try Salvia. So I purchased 3 grams of 20x extract from a reputable online source. It was the strongest extract that the source offered. I figured since I liked to trip hard that I should acquire the most potent available, after all, how strong can a legal botanical extract be? Right? This way of thinking was my first mistake. Truly, I was actually quite skeptical that there was much if any psychoactive properties at all. I had the extract in my possession for a full 2 weeks before I tried it, almost forgetting about it.
One evening in late November, most of my work around the house was done, I was settling down and remembered that I had the Salvia extract. Cool. The lights were low and I had some new music spinning on the CD player. My roomate was in his room, half asleep. I gathered about what was probably less than a tenth of a gram. Enough to half fill the bowl of a small/medium glass pipe. I figured I would sit down before taking the hit in case I felt woozy. I had no idea what to expect, it was my first time. I hit the pipe pretty hard for one hit. I remembered that the smoke was fairly easy on the lungs and the smell was reasonably pleasant. I cannot remember if I tried to take a second hit. I may have or I may have taken a small second hit. The reason I cannot remember is because almost immediately after that first hit, I was in another world, completely lost and out of touch.
I will describe what happens next from 1. flashes of memory 2. what I could feel internally and 3. an account from my roomate who was shaken from sleep by my activities. It may be best to first describe my physical journey. From the comfort of my living room I somehow left the house running. I was in my bare feet and shorts. It was 50 degrees and raining. I never go anywhere without wearing shoes. Running, running, running. I wound up in the lobby of a nearby hotel screaming for my life. I left the hotel running and headed toward a house. Thankfully that house was mine, I entered, partially not realizing it was mine at first. I then recognized my excited roommate and began to get back in touch with reality. While I am not exactly sure of the entire duration, my best guess is that it could have been as short as 15 minutes or possibly as long as 25.
I know that I was in the hotel lobby because I have a fair amount of memory of the turmoil that I created there. Those people must have thought that I was crazed lunatic. They were right, that is exactly what I was for that period of time. I remember screaming for an older gentleman there in the lobby to take my hand. 'Take my hand!', 'Take my hand!' I kept screaming. I felt that I wanted to see if the people there were real. The man almost took my hand in a gesture of seeing that I was distressed and that I may have needed help. I ran again. This was probably a good thing. I few more minutes in there and I'm sure the cops would have shown up. Total time there at the hotel, I'd say less than 2 minutes.
I believed that the world was ending. I thought that we, the people of this planet, all of our love and relationships, our friends and families, our jobs and material things, was an alien owned project that was being scrapped for whatever reason. If you remember the Steven King movie and novel called the Langoliers then you might have a good idea of what I thought was happening. In the book something is eating away at the fiber of time erasing everything that exists and leaving nothingness. I remember a feeling of bitterness in my heart towards these overseers that were now destroying their toy project.
I actually physically felt a force behind my head and back that was taking chunks from me and my spirit, kind of like the way a Pacman would go about consuming its prey. The force was so strong that it was apparent to me that there was no hope of escaping it. I remember feeling a profound sorrow, that I would never see my beloved girl Jenny again. And I was enraged that they dare consume her precious existance, but I was still running trying to stay alive for a few more moments. I recall not having great fear for the termination of my own life, but rather the sorrow of the ending of good times with those that I cared for. Perhaps there is some posivite self realization there in some of those feelings that resulted.
It was very fortunate that from the hotel I found my way back to my own house, though I still was not certain where I was yet or what was real and what was not. I suppose I could have headed across the highway by the motel which might have produced deadly results. The sight of my confused roommate, who had no idea why I would be running around outside at night with no shoes, was the beginning of getting back in touch. Shouting, I asked him to call Jenny on the phone. Still wondering what had happened I was seeking assurance from that person closest to me.
My roommate was relaying our conversation from her to me as he held the phone. I would not take the phone because I was afraid to touch anything yet for fear that it might just disappear. Jenny showed up within 20 minutes cell phone still in hand and talking to my roommate. Agitated for the next 20 minutes or so I paced and talked to them about the whole experience. We kept checking outside to see if the police had been called to the hotel. The hotel is in view of my house. Everything was cool thereafter.
Overall I did not find much in this experience redeeming. It certainly was interesting, intense, creepy and terrifying. While I cannot say that I am sorry that I tried it, its doubtful that I will try it again or at least in the same way again. I now judge the psychoactive compounds in Salvia to be the most potent in nature. At least based on my experience. I think that is a lot coming from someone who can typically consume a quarter ounce of mushrooms.
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