Citation: Waiting for the Sun. "NMDA Antagonist Synergism: An Experience with DXM & Nitrous Oxide (exp47043)". Erowid.org. Aug 8, 2007. erowid.org/exp/47043
Before the report, there are a couple things I would like to add. This was I believe my fourth experience with DXM, and my first in conjunction with nitrous. My memory of the experience is not a very good one for two reasons. First, I am writing this report months after the experience, and secondly because the nature of DXM itself does seem to make many things fuzzy and leave periods of time forgotten. However, certain aspects remain fairly distinct in my mind and I have tried not to include anything that could be too far from the truth. Anyway, onto the report.
Ingestion took place around 12:00am or 1:00am and was not difficult. I had not eaten anytime recently and was in a positive mood. First effects noted somewhere between thirty and forty-five minutes. No stomach discomfort of any sort was noticed, contrary the experiences of many others. First noticeable changes are very subtle. A feeling that can only be described as “more aware” occurs and objects appear more interesting than usual. The sense of vision seems to be more interesting in general. Around the same time a feeling of my body being lighter and more fluid is felt. This peculiarity increases with time to a point where motion becomes physically euphoric, like it just feels good to move and certain motion feels better than others. The action of something such as falling onto my bed is very pleasant. Not much later I decided to turn out the lights, lie in bed with headphones on, and a cover pulled over my head.
Within what might have been a half-hour I felt a distinct feeling of giving up control and sinking into the experience. While not very bright, a detailed mesh type pattern that is very intricate appears with my eyes closed. The “lost control” feeling begins to feel like more of an illusion than something that was really happening. Music sounds somewhat enhanced but not as much as a lower dose usually produces. Visuals come and go as time progresses but never really become especially pronounced or distinct. One strong illusion was that even though I was in a dark room with a cover over my head I could see my room as though I was really looking at it. Physical senses such as my bed tilting in a direction and gravity would just send me sliding down were fairly common. After several CD’s and just general intake of the experience I decided to test the effects of binaural beats while under the influence of DXM. With headphones on, I set the audio to 6hz (theta range) and the screen to flash at the same rate. With eyes closed, the experience was one of seemingly somewhat intense motion, reminiscent of a roller coaster. The motion was very pronounced but also very gentle. It was not pleasurable or uncomfortable, it was more or less just a feeling. No significant mental effects were noted.
After a short while I had no desire to continue on with this experiment so I didn’t. Sometime afterward I decided to test the effects of nitrous in conjunction with this experience. Being that both are NMDA-antagonist, I expected a strong interaction. The first balloon was filled with some difficulty, and then inhaled while lying in bed as I was before the binaural expedition. As a tide of nitrous slowly crept up and washed over me, I melted away with it. My bed became a rocky slope, and I ran like a stream gently flowing down and over the crevices. It was a very physically foreign experience and my mind was in such awe that no extreme mental effects were noted. Slowly over what seemed like a long period of time, in reality probably no more than one or two minutes, I returned to my normal sense of self. The experience was one that garnered such interest that I decided I must repeat it. So I once again managed to fill a balloon up and inhale the contents. With my lungs filled to capacity, I put the empty balloon aside and eagerly awaited what was to come.
I was suddenly hit with an idea, what seemed like the most clear idea ever to be had. I felt like I was hit by an epiphany of what my life had become, concerning my substance use. In an instant, entire scenarios of me being found in this obviously incoherent state and the disappointed reaction that would follow jumped into my mind like headlines from a newspaper. At the same time I was looking at myself from another perspective, examining where I was in life and felt rather disappointed. “What have I become, this is me, in my room, inhaling balloons and drinking cough syrup” seemed like a profound revelation that made the most bold confrontation possible. While it was not an extremely negative experience, is was definitely not mush of a positive one either. It is very odd though, because my conscious attitude of my substance use is the complete opposite. I feel very responsible with what I choose to do and how/when I choose to do it. I guess these were sub-concious feelings surfacing. Physically, it was also quite a profound experience. I was suddenly shot across what seemed like infinity, my body spreading until it was nothing and all that was left of me was a dot. I was the smallest dot possible in an infinity of space. There were other dots, but there were inanimate.
As with the first balloon, I slowly returned to myself, learning again what it is like to have a body and be on earth. I continued to listen to music and explore my mind after that experience for a while. I was able to fairly easily re-enter a moderate nitrous-intoxicated like state if I tried. I got up to use the bathroom and check the time a couple times, and noticed that walking was extremely difficult (e.g. I couldn’t walk without holding onto something) and I had double vision to the extent that reading anything took a great deal of time and effort. I believe I did manage to catch an hour or so of sleep that night but when I awoke it was still early. For the first hour or so I was awake, a few light effects were still noticeable, but I considered everything to be over and was consumed with the experience. All I could think about was the many new places I had reached and explored. After reflecting on the possible significance of the whole event I eventually got up and tried to go about my day as I normally would. It is worth noting that for a period of a month to two months after the experience I felt my mental capabilities, particularly in spelling and using/finding the right word, had diminished. Eventually these things seemed to have subsided, but have caused enough concern in me to seriously consider never repeating the experience.
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