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I Was The Light
Salvia divinorum (5x extract), Amphetamines (Speed) & Mushrooms
Citation:   Michelle. "I Was The Light: An Experience with Salvia divinorum (5x extract), Amphetamines (Speed) & Mushrooms (exp38536)". Erowid.org. Feb 26, 2008. erowid.org/exp/38536

 
DOSE:
    MDMA  
      Amphetamines  
      Mushrooms  
  1 bowl smoked Salvia divinorum (extract - 5x)
BODY WEIGHT: 154 lb
This is my first and only experience with salvia. I will take you back to Friday night when my self and three friends decided to have an evening involving ecstasy and speed in a house. As it generally does with speed, it carried on until the next morning when an idea to buy mushrooms and salvia was acted upon. We went to purchase our goods and returned home at roughly lunchtime. A fairly gentle mushroom trip took place for the four of us (with a constant supply of speed within our veins). Once the trip had subsided we needed more stimulation and remembered about the salvia which was innocently sitting on the mantle piece.

One person there had already tried it on a few occasions and had tried to educate me about the kind of experience I might have but I couldn't possibly understand the truth in his words. Salvia is not a party drug or a high it is something else which I have no proof for. Some background information about myself is that all of my life I have felt a presence or shadow maybe, this is more apparent when I take mushrooms.

I was knelt on the floor in a room with the lights on and music playing in the background. Two of the friends had decided to stay sober, something which I was very thankful for, and myself and the experienced friend decided to smoke the salvia. I inhaled a bong of smoke and held it in for ten seconds then blew it out. All of a sudden I wasn't in the room anymore. I felt like I had been dragged back at high speed. It was as if a hole had been ripped in the fabric of the universe and I had been pulled through it. What I really felt like was my soul had detached itself from my body, I had no physical self, I was gold energy flowing towards a doorway. This doorway had walls either side of it made of what could be clouds or smoke. There were presences that stood in the doorway, the same ones I had always felt and they were calling me asking me if I wanted to come in. They weren't good or bad as such. Behind the door way was black and also there was a sky which was black. I want to say that I wasn't seeing this through my physical eyes because I had no body.

I started to be pulled away from this place, back where I had come from. I was being pulled away from the most terrifying but realest thing that has ever happened to me. It felt more real to be in that place than anything I have ever experienced in my life and will ever experience. I truly believe I have been shown the meaning of my life. As I started to come back I wasn't sure what was happening. I was scared and in shock, I couldn't accept what was going on. I could see the other person on salvia but know one else in the room. It was like he was being dragged back in front of me. He was part of the chair, I felt him reaching out to me and trying to talk to me and guide me back. Later on he told me that in his mind he had been part of the chair. For an instant smaller than a second I felt part of his mind, like a snap shot of his thoughts.

I was panicking and I started to see other things in the room. At first I couldn't believe I was back to this world, I started touching everyone to see if it was real. I felt myself being dragged back again and I didn't want to go. I was scared and in disbelief. This feeling of being dragged back and forth went on for a few minutes getting weaker and weaker and I slowly accepted that I as back in the world as I always knew it.

After the experience we had a long discussion of the events that had happened. One of my friends told me that for about two minutes I was in a catatonic state where my eyes were open and my body was alive but my soul/consciousness/whatever was gone. Also the friend who I took the salvia with described being dragged to the same place as I was, forward and down.

This experience was truly more real than anything else, I have been spiritually enlightened. My conclusion is that the salvia does something to the brain which stops the soul sending information to it. Once the soul is disconnected from the body it moves to this place where there is a doorway. I am unsure whether I could pass through the doorway (I am inclined to think no) but I honestly think that everything in this world is constructed by the energy of our souls. I have no idea what is behind the doorway but I am certain that one day I will go through.

This experience has changed my whole life and given me the courage to trust my instincts and ignore the mathematical rationality of my brain. I do not think it mattered that I had done a lot of other substances previous to the salvia, when I as in the place with the doorway this world did not exist; it was a different level of existence which I cannot explain in words. Afterwards I felt extremely deflated and emotional, I am trying to come to terms with this and am finding it difficult. Life feels slightly emptier in a way. This is not a bad thing but I am concentrating my efforts into the researching of the experience. I am humbled, enlightened and a little sad, it is hard to let go of the ideals I have been taught since birth. I am not sad because the experience was bad, I am sad because it has shown me the true way and basically old habits die hard.

Exp Year: 2004ExpID: 38536
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Feb 26, 2008Views: 5,865
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Salvia divinorum (44) : First Times (2), Combinations (3), Mystical Experiences (9), Entities / Beings (37), General (1), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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