Take a Survey on the use of Breathwork
for Anxiety, Depression, Trauma, or PTSD
Researchers at Johns Hopkins seek responses to an anonymous survey on breathwork. You can participate whether your breathwork experiences helped or not.
(Must be 18+) Take the Survey!
Would Have Been a Shameful Death
by xylobit
Citation:   xylobit. "Would Have Been a Shameful Death: An Experience with Cocaine (exp37839)". Erowid.org. Jan 17, 2020. erowid.org/exp/37839

  repeated insufflated Cocaine (powder / crystals)


This was my first cocaine binge and if I can just remember the pain and fear I experienced, it is my last. A friend and I split for an 8-ball and we both concluded there was something seriously wrong with it. I snorted a gram over about 6 hrs. The first two lines, about 2.5cm each, instilled me with alertness but no euphoria. Half an hour I tried a bit more and began feeling unpleasantly 'edgy'. Picture an untuned tv showing that scrambling white noise. That is exactly how I felt.

I continued doing more and more despite steadily worsening symptoms. At first it was like a cold: running noise, sore throat, and headache. About 4 hrs in I began feeling a tightness in my chest and shortness of breath. My blood pressure must have been pretty high because I could feel each heart contraction vibrate throughout my chest. The discomfort increased along with overdose paranoia. I spent about 3 hrs laying as still as possible and trying to control my breathing. And yeah, praying.

Next day I dumped the rest. That was an expensive little vial of sickness and pain. Each time I crave it I try to remember every detail of the pain and fear. I could be pissed off that I got ripped off with bunk shit, or I can use the experience to stave off an addiction people die for. I think I may be very lucky that my first binge was a little taste of hell.

Exp Year: 2004ExpID: 37839
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Jan 17, 2020Views: 1,382
[ View as PDF (for printing) ] [ View as LaTeX (for geeks) ] [ Switch Colors ]
Cocaine (13) : Difficult Experiences (5), What Was in That? (26), Small Group (2-9) (17)

COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.

Experience Vaults Index Full List of Substances Search Submit Report User Settings About Main Psychoactive Vaults