Citation: JoJo23. "Getting Carried Away: An Experience with Amphetamines (Adderall) & Sleep Deprivation (exp37669)". Erowid.org. Dec 20, 2004. erowid.org/exp/37669
For kicks and giggles I decided to test myself and see just what effect tweaking with Adderall would have on my mind and body. For starters, it should be understood that I am a Manic-Depressive and will never touch methamphetamine because it is absorbed far too quickly for my brain to handle--if I tweaked on meth, I'd prolly go into a mania and never return.
Anyway, I'm prescribed Adderall, 10 mg standard and 20 mg XR, and I decided to see what a week of tweaking would be like. I awoke on a Sunday afternoon at around 1:00 PM. I enjoyed the afternoon at my leisure and when the night-time came, I went to my laptop and spent the wee hours of the morning watching music videos and chatting to friends online. As 4:00 AM approached, fatigue began to set in and so it was time to take my first dose; I began with 4 Adderall XR, orally, and went back to my computer. 15 minutes later, after allowing the oral dose to begin entering my system, I broke out one of my blue 10 mg standard pills and broke it in half, crushing a half at a time and snorting the blue powder lines over the course of 15 minutes or so. Ingesting the XR form a set time before snorting the regular pill served to maintain a longer and higher peak.
A mere five minutes after snorting the 10 mg I felt a wave of sensation move down my legs from my thighs to my feet. Inside my head felt like the sensation of opening a fresh Coke--all of the fatigue was swept away and my focus immediately became more attuned to anything and everything. The worst thing about speed, however, is the dry spot that forms at the back of my throat. I think this is because A) my mouth dries out B) the drainage of any snorted amphetamine and C) an overactive swallowing reflex. Without snorting the Adderall, the first sign of coming up is the grinding of my teeth; with snorting, however, the first sign is a complete change of perception. Everything becomes accessible, intriguing, etc. I found myself playing Literati on Yahoo! Games, which is just like Scrabble. I sat at the computer for approximately 5 hours playing the game as if I were trying to find a finish line. I had to creep to my bedroom and pretend to be asleep as my mom left to go to work; laying in my bed, the desire to sleep quickly fell upon me and I closed my eyes, feeling as though sleep was seconds away. But upon hearing the door shut and my mom drive away, I leapt from my bed and the speed and buzzing of the Adderall surged through my veins once again.
I located a pack of gum in my kitchen and got a glass of water, my teeth beginning to hurt and my throat begging for moisture. I had to take my tongue ring out because I was grinding my teeth on it (WARNING-on ANY stimulants, always remove all mouth jewelry). I made my way up to my room and upon seeing a mess, the desire to clean inspired me; I began throwing trash away, hanging up clothes, made my bed, sorted papers and cds, and the entire time I was singing to the Chicago soundtrack. My mood was at a 20 on a scale of 1 to 10. I had to be productive, I needed work to do. I finished my room and set to work on my bathroom, scrubbing the shower and cleaning off the counter-top. Next, I moved into the kitchen, unloading the dishwasher and then washing every dish on the counter and putting it up. I made my way back down to my computer and got to work playing more Literati.
The time to go to my Psychology class quickly came and so I got showered and dressed and, after taking another dose of 4 XR 20 mg, departed in my car.
Driving while on speed (here I'm referring to Adderall, not meth) is almost the perfect task. I loved the focus and attention required. I would watch cars turn into and out of roads, the signals, the traffic lights, the colors, the curves of the road, the sensations of the car, etc. My psychology class, though already my favorite class, was even more intriguing this time around. I watched my professor constantly, almost as if I were alone and I were being tutored--this information was exclusively being revealed solely to me. I wanted to take more notes, I wanted to learn more, I wanted to memorize, I wanted, I wanted....Then it was time to go. It was about 9:30 PM on Monday night when I arrived back home. I immediately did my homework and went back to my computer. While downstairs, I took 5 20 mg XR and crushed another 10 mg, snorting half of it some 15 minutes later. My body by this point was light as a feather. I could control each and every nerve with exact precision. I started playing Literati again and played through until 7:00 AM Tuesday morning, pausing only once to take 4 more 20 mg XR and to snort the remaining half of the 10 mg.
I went and showered and got dressed to go to my Logic class, the most boring and mind-numbing class I've ever taken. On the drive there, I found myself taking groups of letters and trying to form them into words, clearly a result of my relentless playing of Literati on the computer. The beauty of speed is that it spikes motivation and desire to an unimaginable level. Halfway through the 3-hour class, we took our 10 minute break and I stole away to the water fountain to redose-3 20 mg XR. Moving into the 48 hour marker, my mind was in a state of constant necessity: things had to be done, and those things needed to be discovered immediately and taken care of. My body was tingling and warm all over, my muscles sometimes twitching or pulsing for no reason, but all fairly neutral, some even pleasurable.
Leaving class at 3:30 PM, I arrived at home and went straight to my computer, playing more Literati. Perhaps this is the trouble with any kind of speed--it's great for tasks I can complete but for things with an indefinite amount of time involved, I have to be careful.
A few hours passed and by 5:00 PM Tuesday afternoon, I was bored. Thus I went to the TV and tried to watch some cartoons; as soon as I sat down and began watching, the need to sleep overwhelmed me and I began to feel very weak. I made my way to the 10 mg, crushing a half and snorting it, along with another 4 20 mg XR pills. Here is another problem with speed--my energy level comes in waves. Upon snorting the other half of the 10 mg pill, I hit a new peak and went to work on school assignments not due for weeks. By late tuesday night, the headache from hypertension, dehydration and sleep deprivation was becoming unbearable and so I located some extra strength tylenol with caffeine. I took them with a Coke, along with 3 more 20 mg XR pills. The headache lessened, but the intensity of the Adderall only grew stronger. My body felt like I had just stood up from laying in a high-intensity massage-chair. My heart was racing, my mouth was dry, my throat hurt, my breathing was rapid, and it was nearly 1:00 AM Wednesday morning.
I began watching music videos online, watching tv, chatting, playing Literati, and playing Spider Solitaire all at once. I guess my mind was tired of routine and wanted a challenge. One thing I began to notice was that my senses were beginning to betray me--I would see shadows out of the corner of my eyes or see objects flicker or move, when in reality they weren't. The sleep deprivation was beginning to get to me. I spent the next two days multi-tasking to the point of insanity, taking around 120 mg of Adderall XR two to three times in a 24 hour period, and using the 10 mg pills to peak sharper and faster.
On Thursday morning I went upstairs after a night of games, music videos, and tv and pretended to be asleep. Once my mom had left, I got into the shower and discovered something very frightening--I was yellow. Clearly it was jaundice--the amphetamine was taking its toll on my liver. I spent the next 25 minutes out of the shower taking vitamins, drinking cup after cup of water and finally eating one piece of cheese----the first thing I had eaten since Sunday afternoon. I followed the snack with a chaser of 3 20 mg XR. Looking outside, everything appeared to be like static, wavering or flickering, pulsing or vibrating. My touch had become ultra-sensitive. The yellow faded as I cooled down from getting out of the shower, but I still wore long-sleeves and blue jeans to class that day. Driving down the road, I constantly would jerk my head left and right, thinking I was seeing something beside me. Shadows had become alive and paranoia was taking over.
That afternoon I went to get a haircut and spent 10 minutes of torture and suffering as the clippers vibrated my entire skull. The sensory overload was beyond words. Touching things had become too much for me. Talking became pointless because my train of thought was moving too quickly for my mouth to keep up. Ideas would come and go on a whim, leaving me jumping from subject to subject in any conversation. My chest was extremely tight and my pulse was wild; looking back on it, I can now assume that the XR had basically saturated my bloodstream and I was on a constant peak. The world was moving too slow and I was being held back. But I was starting to mess up. I was seeing and hearing things more and more. Turning my head would cause trails and lines to follow anything I looked at. I stayed home for fear of collapsing or suffering a freak narcoleptic spell.
By Thursday night, 10:00 PM, the sleep deprivation had overwhelmed me. Everywhere I turned I saw what looked like oily shadow figures flying back and forth. Outside, any sound was magnified 100 times. I was sweaty and the lack of sleep had caused my body to start producing extra ammonia, making my sweat unbearable to smell. Hours had passed since my last dosage and I was still surging forward at full speed. I paced around my house all night long, my mom having gone out of town. I would constantly find myself in the bathroom, examinining my face for blackheads, pimples or ingrown hairs (BEWARE this behavior. Speed encourages routinized behaviors and if you start popping zits or plucking eyebrows, you could end up tearing half your face off).
Friday was insane. The world was an illusion--it was as if my mind has been unable to dream due to lack of sleep so it was uploading dreams into reality. I was paranoid of everything. On my way to class Friday night (5:30 PM) I drove 10 mph under the speed limit, no radio, the air off, windows up....My senses had taken too much. Class was slow and I spent the entire 2 1/2 hours examining every detail of the room and also trying to spot which shadows were real and which were imagined. Arriving home that night, I went to the medicine cabinet. Everything had become too much; I NEEDED sleep. I went to the kitchen and found two Tylenol PM's and took them with a sip of water and a tablespoon of Nyquil. I began to come down finally around 2:00 AM and as soon as the Adderall began to wear off, my consciousness crumbled. I blacked out around 2:30 AM and don't remember going to bed or anything. I woke up around 4 PM, skipping my Saturday class that day. I went and ate a piece of cheese, a piece of sandwich meat, and had a glass of water. I then went back to sleep until 10:00 PM. I woke up to use the bathroom.
Other than pissing, I hadn't used the restroom in almost 7 days. My intestines were nearly bone-dry. It hurt more than I would care to share. Finishing with that, I went back to bed and slept until late Sunday afternoon. I didn't feel depressed, weak or like I had just come off of something, but I obviously sensed that the edge and power of the Adderall had worn off.
6 days....144 hours....In just one day short of a week, I played Chicken with my sanity and easily could have lost. Maybe it was stupid, but I wanted to test myself after all, and test myself I did. I only use Adderall now to enhance my attention and to up my motivation; I'd warn anyone to be very very careful when using speed of any sort. It's highly addictive and easy to get carried away with, though I'd rather people used Adderall as opposed to meth anyway. Any regrets? None at all....My 6 days of Adderall were eye-opening, exciting, and productive to say the least. Everything is a learning experience.
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