Citation: Sweetherb. "One Full Week of Straight Hell!: An Experience with Methamphetamine & MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp34499)". Erowid.org. May 26, 2007. erowid.org/exp/34499
I had gone up to my boyfriends college to visit him Valentines Day weekend on Friday night. We had been doing mdma on a pretty regular basis, and this weekend was to be no different. But drugs could not be found at the college so we took the 2 hour drive back to my hometown, borrowing my friend bill's car, to pick up some e and then go back. When we got to my friend's house who was hooking us up with the E, I was told that there was meth around. I was scared, I had never done meth and I knew that I was going to get the chance to that night.
So we went to pick up the E and the kid there broke me out a line of meth. Instantly it burned wayyy worse than coke ever has but it only lasted a second. Soon I felt like I was rolling. I had more energy and the glow sticks and trance music was pulling me in. Needless to say we didn't end up going back to the college like we thought. Then my boyfriend and I each ate 2 pills, later we found out the pills were straight meth bombs, and hung out entranced by the music and the light sticks. It was a nice clean roll for a while but then I started coming down. I didn't want to come down so I bought another pill at 6am and continued rolling. Everyone left at like 12pm and we really didn't have any place to go. My boyfriend was not supposed to be in town, and we were incredibly cracked out from lack of sleep. Oh and my boyfriend had told me he cheated on me the night before but I had been too fucked up to get mad at him for it.
Now its valentines day. I hadn't gotten any sleep and I'm trippin out, seeing glowsticks EVERYWHERE, there was a whole wall of them in fact. We ended up going over to his cousin's house and hanging out. My boyfriend was exhausted and went to sleep for a little bit. I took a shower and the whole time I was having audio and visual hallucinations like walls changing color and the shower was telling me to 'get in'.
But that could have been dealt with. That night my boyfriend and I, his cousin 'lisa' and her friend 'nicole' wanted to roll. So we made the trip back, bought some more e, some juice and some glowsticks. We popped the pills around 7pm (mind u I still had gotten no sleep) once the roll started kicking in (around 8pm) I began to notice heavier visuals, and as the night went on they became more and more real until I couldn't distinguish what I was seeing from what was really there. I was seeing all these people that weren't really there, only in the dark though, and trying to climb over people to get to the couch when in reality there was no one sitting there. I would look over to my left and on the arm of the couch I would see revolting faces that scared me. Then we broke out the glowsticks. I was told later on that I was playing with them for like 3 hours straight. I woke up with cuts all over my hands. But the entire time I was seeing dinasours and skulls and having weird random hallucinations. I would look at the walls and the tv and see entire shows and cartoons playing in front of my eyes. Glass took on a whole new dimension.
But I also began to notice that I had been ignored all night by my boyfriend. We began to get that sickness (coming down!) so we called up the kid and he had 3 pills left. It was a long drive to his house but I think we all went (maybe not I dont really remember) but its down this country bass ackwards road and the whole way there I remember looking out the window and seeing all sorts of cartoon characters in the window. So around 3:30 am lisa and nicole popped another pill and my boyfriend and I split one. I got the bigger half cuz it seemed to make sense at the time. We went back downstairs to play with the glowsticks and I was watching lisa and nicole give light shows. I began to see all sorts of shapes in the middle like hearts and the sort. This lasted until about 6 am sunday morning when I began to notice intense audio hallucinations. Somebody seemed to be watching my every move and commenting on it negatively.
By this time my body was exhausted and I just wanted to sleep. I kept hearing my boyfriends cousin. I collected my boyfriend and we went to bed. Before we went to bed though we got into a huge fight. I accused him of ignoring me all night, which he had, but later he told me there was something about the look in my eye that he didn't trust- I've seen it myself doing meth again later on. I cried myself to sleep cuz it hurt so bad coming down and the feelings of emptiness were intense. I slept approximately 3 hours before getting up again. But I still felt like I was rolling. At the time I didn't realize I was tripping out because of the meth. I was seeing glowsticks and shadow people everywhere. But even worse I began to realize that EVERYONE was talking about me and everyone didnt like me. I thought that I could hear peoples thoughts and they were all negative.
Shit began to hit the fan that day. My boyfriends mom found out that we were back in town and she got very pissed off about it. That's when things really soured. My boyfriends mom wanted to take me home but I cried and cried and cried rather irrationally because I couldnt let my mom see me like that. So I ended up pulling a few strings and lying to everyone and was able to stay with my boyfriend that night. We went back to his house and I couldn't sleep still. I was having a very intense bad trip. Later thinking about it, what manifested in front of my eyes was everything that I thought was evil and wrong. I was seeing everything from a movie of the attack on WTC playing over and over again to a meeting of the Ku Klux Klan going on in somebody's back yard.
My boyfriend had bought me roses for Valentines day and I've always thought flowers are a bad gift, but that night I watched them wither and die over and over again. I even looked in the mirror and didn't see my reflection. I begged my boyfriend to stay awake with me, I was so scared, but he really didn't understand what was going on and I didn't want to tell him I had done meth. So we got up the next day and my boyfriend was supposed to drive back to his college, give Bill's car back and go back to school. But we ended up hanging out for a while before he was going to drop me off. We went over to the kid's house who had meth and I ended up doing a line for some hydrocodone that I had stolen from my boyfriends mom. I told my mom I was hanging out with his brother mike. When I went to call my mom shit went bad. She had found out I wasn't with mike and they had people out looking for us.
So being irrational and fucked out of our minds the first thing we decided to do was go back to my boyfriends college, escaping any problem there. But shit was bad, we didn't have any money for gas (and this was before gas was 2.25 a fucking gallon thank god) so I borrowed a couple dollars from a friend, it was all I could get and we went about our way.
We got there in 1 piece, but once I was there I began hallucinating wicked bad. I thought my friend bill was trying to kill me, people were following me, but when I went to them they would always back away, and I thought the cops were after me, my boyfriends mom and him were conspiring against me, and I thought a few of my friends were commenting on my every move. I could not tell the difference between my meth induced psychosis and reality. Bugs were crawling all over my skin. I tried to tell my boyfriend that people were after me and trying to kill me, but now I realize how stupid that must have sounded. I didn't sleep for another 2 nights at all. I also could not bear the thought of food, so I lost like 10 pounds in 5 days, drinking mostly blue powerade.
When I finally came down completely I got really sick because my immune system was killed at that point. My boyfriend and I had basically said our goodbyes forever, although we dated a little bit longer I see that as the official end of our relationship. Meth is an incredibly powerful drug and a lot of people dont know what they are getting themselves into. I certianly didn't.
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