Citation: Will. "What Happened?: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp30328)". Erowid.org. Jan 26, 2004. erowid.org/exp/30328
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I have used MDMA recreationally about 10 times over the last 5 months dosing only a single tab at once. My first 3 experiences were by far the best 3 hour periods of my life, the third experience being the pinnacle. The empathetic feelings I felt during the initial trips slowly diminished with every use though; and the crash/hangover period intensified and lasted longer. However, up until the 9th trip, the experience was well worth the hangover, which usually only lasted 1-2 days where I felt run-down. On the 9th trip however, the experience was short lived and disappointing with few positive effects. In the 10-12 days following the trip I experienced all of the following which have diminished slowly over time: a lack of ability to focus & concentrate, a 'spaced-out' feeling, experiencing panic/stress attacks, and feeling unmotivated, lethargic, and depressed (I sleep every minute I can). I have also become more anti-social than before.
Not wanting to believe that my reaction was real, I re-dosed 2 weeks later from a source I knew was quality. To my GREAT dismay, the trip was very unsatisfying (lost the magic) and I experienced the negative effects from above with even more severity. I have since given up E for now, in hope that one day I'll be able to return to that initial level of 'love for life'.
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