Citation: Tektonik. "Ability to Dream Destroyed, then Restored: An Experience with Diphenhydramine & 5-MeO-DMT (exp29697)". Erowid.org. Mar 12, 2008. erowid.org/exp/29697
Being a poor college college student seriously affecyed my drug consumption. I went from smoking pot 5 times a day to maybe twice a month if i was lucky, not to mention the complete stopage of various other substances, which i used sporadically.
It's extremely easy to maintain alcohol on a budget in school, but i've never really been a big drinker, because i can't stand the taste. Eventually, because of the limited cash flow, i began to explore over the counter highs. I started off with DXM, which i did maybe 10 times, and i never really found it overly enjoyable. I tried to learn to like alcohol, but i just couldn't get over the taste, the dizzy feeling, and the sickness to my stomach. Not to mention the occasional passing out, throwing up, and hangovers. I was running out of options, aside from sobriety (ha!) when i first tried diphenhydramine, in the form of benadryl. I broke enough tablets into a cup of soda to be 300mg, then downed the whole nasty-ass drink (which still was better than alcohol thank you very much).
Most of the reports I read involving diphenhydramine were horror stories, but i actually enjoyed it. I saw crazy shit on it, like breathing refrigerators, moving houseplants, slime on the walls, etc. The draw for me was feeling normal, aside from feeling like the gravity is much stronger, and seeing this stuff that seems so real, but you know it's not. I did this numerous times, and each time i dosed i was sleeping longer and longer. I finally quit when one time i took the diphenhydramine at 6pm, then woke up at 10pm.........the next day.
It was a moderately rough withdrawal, but nothing i couldn't handle. Unfortunately, something within me had changed. I think it had something to do with the way diphenhydramine skews the difference between fiction and reality. After I quit, I no longer had the coma-like sleeps, so I began to dream again. My dreams were no longer normal, however. What i mean by 'normal' though, is having weird things happen in my dreams: thats normal. Falling off a cliff and waking up just before you hit the ground, that's normal. The dreams I was having now were so realistic that i was constantly wondering if i were awake.
I would wake up, look at the clock and say 'holy crap, i'm late!', jump out of bed ad hurriedly get dressed, only to have the real alarm go off and wake me up, on time. I would talk to my girlfriend, open my eyes and ask her about it, only to find i had dreamed the entire episode. These dreams were so real that i could touch things, smell things, feel heat and cold, everything you can do when you're awake. The common way in which we forget dreams didn't apply either. I remeber these dreams like they were actual events. I wonder to this day how much there is that I remember, but didn't actually happen.
This went on for months. That is, until i received 100mg of 5-meo-dmt. I had tried it one or two times before, without producing more than ringing ears and an intense body high, but nothing special. Then one night, just for fun, i spinkled a small amount of crystals into a spoon, heated it with a lighter, and took two hits through a straw. I laid back in my bed, and let the effects set in. As i felt my head expanding, I felt myself go into a very peaceful meditative state. I had tried meditation, some years before, and that is why i am able to relate the two experiences. My mind was floating in a silent, black abyss. All of the normal mental chatter in my head, ceased, and i was in complete silence. I think my mind was being cleansed of my previous 'mind-condensing' experiences.
I'm not sure how long it took, it seemed like an eternity, but all of a sudden something appeared in my field of view that was like acid eating away at my consciousness. It looked kind of like if I looked down at a sheet of paper while I burned it from underneath with a lighter; the way the flame spreads and consumes the paper. I felt the adrenaline rush of fear as the acid finally consumed me; and the next thing i remember is a normal, regular old, weird ass dream. From that night forth, i no longer had the diphenhydramine dreams (nightmares?), and I sleep soundly, thanks to this powerful substance.
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