Mushrooms - P. cubensis
Citation: David S.. "Memory of My Birth: An Experience with Mushrooms - P. cubensis (exp28674)". Erowid.org. Jan 4, 2007. erowid.org/exp/28674
I had been working with psychoactive mushrooms (psilocybin) for two years and had amazing results with age regression in the last few sessions. Without the mushroom I had memories only as far back as five and a half years old and before then it was all a haze. I discovered I could use the effects of the mushrooms to push that back a few years.
Using the mushroom I could remember as far back to some traumatic event in my life. Once that event was remembered I could remember further back. So I started at 5 ½ and worked backwards. It was amazing how the mushroom worked. It was like playing a tape of my life except when I press play I jumped into the scene and I was there! It was like traveling back in time.
EXAMPLE: JULY 15th 1969 (5 grams dry mushroom)
It’s July, 1955. I’m 5 1/2 years old. I’m in front of my house… [ ] Street in [ ] Massachusetts. I’m walking towards [ ] Street. It’s a hot sunny day and I’m wearing a blue outfit. As I pass under some maple trees I enter my character and cross the intersection of [ ] and [ ]. To my left [ ] street is paved. To my rite [ ] Street is still a dirt road for the last hundred feet as it terminates at what was once called the Bumpity road. I can hear birds, crickets and the traffic up on [ ] Street. I can see and smell blacktop and tar. Kerosene road lamps are on the ground in front of the Miller’s house, they’re lit and look like black cannon balls with flame and thick black smoke billowing from the top. They’re about to finish paving the street.
Steven D. is up at [ ] Street calling me to come to him. Steven is my age; five and a half. As I approach… things go dizzy. Steven is pointing down at something. It doesn’t make sense at first and it takes me a while… but then I begin to understand. It’s a dead squirrel; head crushed by a car. My first encounter with DEATH!
I would find myself back on my couch still under the influence of the mushrooms and less than a minute had passed. Memory block lifted, I could now remember quite vividly all the way back to when I was 3 ½.
It would go on from there. At 3 ½… a memory of my older brother rough housing with our collie Laddy. (I thought our dog was trying to eat him.)
With that lifted I could remember everything back to when I was 2 ½ when, regressed again, witnessed my brother having his cast and a traction pin removed from his leg at [ ] Hospital. (They left the door open to the waiting room.) Then I could remember being eighteen months.
My last session had brought me back to crib memories. This was verified by my mother when I identified a room of a house we use to live in back in 1950. (We moved out of that house when I was three months old. She had asked me how I could possibly remember that far back.)
I ultimately went as far back as three months old but had trouble going back any further during my last session. Something was blocking my memory. It was a dream I had at three months old but I couldn’t remember it until…
OCTOBER 20th, 1969
10:00 PM – Ingested: 5 grams of dried Cubensis mushrooms
Body weight: 168 lbs. - empty stomach
Session #4 - Regressing to earliest memory
First effects were felt in twenty minutes.
Ninety minutes after ingestion I was having strong visuals. I closed my eyes.
11:35 PM (95 minutes after ingestion)
Regressed to mid June 1950 - I’m in a crib…I had just awaken from that dream again and I’m screaming.
A cluster of infinite strings all parallel to one another and extending in both directions to infinitely are vibrating each to its own frequency. One linear string resonates the other in a harmonic exchange, creating a powerful and all encompassing cosmic song. I’m part of this song, riding an energy crest along my own harmonic string. The song sings of intangible geometric shapes, densities, magnitudes and mathematical equivalencies… each string sharing all its information with one another in a song that has no beginning. I am one such energy string,… disembodied,… without substance… vibrating in perfect harmony…. with no perception of time or space… no sensation of awareness, just..... ALL!
Then....at a particular point along one of the parallel strings… the cosmic song is disrupted by a slight variation in frequency. This point has gravitated to a lower pitch. Adjacent parallel strings in close proximity are also pulled down in pitch as to fill the void of disruption until the whole cosmic song begins to distort and slow down. As if it were audible, the song grows ever louder as the pitch falls lower in proportion.
Sudden feeling of 'being'...disassociation...discomfort.
A smell. A taste...(that salty copper taste)… Salty fluid permeating the nasals cavities and chest area...an ever increasing feeling of discomfort and that mucus salty like smell.
The feeling of being disconnected from the song...extreme discomfort... first audible sounds and tones now being heard...fluids discharging from nose and lungs….blinding white light….feeling of terror, the cosmic song crescendos in an abrupt deafening silence.
….very quiet for what seems to be a very long time……. no harmonics. The memory of the song slowly fades...then a noise...a loud noise from another place. It awakens me from some kind of a dream. The noise makes me feel uncomfortable....and that SMELL!! It still lingers; residual dried embryonic fluids still incrusted in parts of the posterior portions of the nasal cavities...and that TASTE...
Visual stimuli now coordinating with other sensory input as I am becoming self aware inside a crib.
(It's the 1st morning after my birth and one eye is crusted over from last nights sleep. There is an urge to remove the annoyance but an inability to figure out how.)
A loud sound from another place makes me feel uneasy. I don't understand sounds. It carries no information, just random noise; no harmonics like...like...
Memories of the song fades as I receive more and more input from my new environment. A song I once understood now fades in the obscurity of the sights and sounds of my new surroundings. My first day is a fleeting moment drowned in a whirlwind of sensory stimuli.
I’m falling asleep again and my head lays to the right. There is little difference between dreaming and being awake.
That night I had thought I went as far back as one could possibly go when…
11:37 AM (97 minutes after ingestion)
I begin having memories that are not mine!
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