Citation: 14:30. "New Friend, Molly?: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstacy) (exp28437)". Erowid.org. Nov 16, 2003. erowid.org/exp/28437
||(pill / tablet)
Let me give a quick summary of my evening before I head into the full experience:
At appoxomately 8 O'clock this evening, I began drinking. I estimate my intake at 4-6 drinks over the course of four hours. Around midnight, I was sobering up, and snorted 1/3 of one ecstacy pill. 1.5 hours later, I snorted 1/3 of a capsule I was told contained 'molly', aka, ecstacy.
Also, I am writing this first section after having (so far as I can tell) fully come down off of my drugs, and on the night of the experience.
Mindset: I'd had a very tiring but not particularly upsetting day. I only got about four hours of sleep last night, though I am usually well-rested. I was unable to sleep because of some unspecific 'mental miasmatic' feelings; that is, last night I felt emotionally down, and that's as well as I can describe it. This morning, I awoke very early for me (due to an appointment I had to keep), feeling quite chipper. This feeling lasted throughout my day, though by the evening, I was almost chain-smoking ciggarettes (this is something I often do when I am tired). Going into taking the first pill, I was approaching sober (from alcohol consumed earlier), but still rather nervous. I'd been planning on trying X at some point, I just had no suspicion that it would be tonight. From the first mention of the possibility of using it, I had imbibed within 20 minutes.
Setting: My apartment complex, where I have lived for four months. This experience occurred with two friends whom I do not know terribly well, though I do trust to a large degree.
Preparation: None made, as the idea to use came on rather suddenly and there were tabs of X available.
Dose 1) (approx. 12 AM): I snorted 1/3 of one white pill. The pill was scored down the middle, and otherwise unmarked. It was fairly small, and I have it on good authority that this pill came from Amsterdam. The friends I used with had been taking some of these for some time, and said that the experience was a very clean MDMA high.
Dose 2) (approx. 2 AM): Snorted 1/3 of a 'molly' capsule. This was a gel-cap filled with white powder. I do not know anything about the origin of this capsule. The person who sold it to me is only an acquaintance, though he uses these himself and says that they are 'good shit'. Looking back on this, I wouldn't have used such an unknown pill if I hadn't been rolling when I decided to take it. I'd have done... not anything, but a lot, to extend that experience.
Medications: Early in the evening, before I began drinking (roughly 7:30) I took one off-brand heartburn reducer pill (ranitidine, 75mg). I do not have any illness and I am not on any other prescriptions.
(A brief history)
It may be useful to understand the nature of the relationships between the three people involved. P. is a friend who lives across from me. When we first met, I sensed some romantic chemistry between the two of us, though I later found out that she is dating someone, J. They have been seeing each other for about 3 years. This feeling of chemistry passed rather quickly, and I have not harbored any deep romantic emotions towards her. J., her boyfriend, lives a good hour and a half away, and spends a decent portion of his time in P. (and my) apartment building. I have drank with both of these people on several occasions, smoked (marijuana) with them twice or more, and I spend a reasonable amount of time with P. We do not know each other terribly well, but we are more than passing acquaintences. J. is a bit stand-offish, not the sort of person I like to associate with, but he is not a bad guy, nor is he particularly threatening.
Both P. and J. are seasoned drug users (just about everything except for crack and heroin), and both have used ecstacy on a number of occassions. This was my first ecstacy experience. Prior to this, I have drank (on many occasions, though I do not drink to get absolutely drunk), smoked marijuana (again, on many occassions, generally once to twice a week for the past year or so), used prescription pain pills recreationally (low doses and while I was recovering from a surgery) and smoked cigarettes (half a pack a day for ~2 years).
My evening began with drinking. P.,J., and myself had roughly 4-7 drinks each (of different sorts; we split two bottles of 'Bacardi Hurricane' and one 750mL bottle of 'Tequila Rose'). This had me fairly buzzed, but not drunk. We had been having a very entertaining evening; everyone was pretty happy. There was also a bottle of Irish cream chilling in the freezer. As we were deciding to break out the Baily's, J. said that he had one more pill of ecstacy remaining. These pills are known to him, and of known effects to him and P. He offered that we each snort 1/3 of the pill he had. This made me a little nervous, but I'd been wanting to try X, so I decided to do so. On the way over to P.'s apartment, J. dropped the bottle of Baily's, shattering it. The bottle was unopned, so that was $26 wasted. This made J. fairly angry, though it did not bother me very much at all, as I decided I was done drinking, and I hadn't paid for the Baily's.
The pill was crushed, divided into three (roughly even) doses. I was the first to snort, at roughly 12AM. As the powder went into my nose, it burned somewhat, but not terribly. Enough to make me wince, but not enough to make me cry. I immediately felt a small lift, though this may have been euphoria, relief that I was trying this stuff, all of the extra oxygen brought in by the snorting I was doing, the drug, or all of the above. I stood rather still for a few minutes, quite giddy, and really getting into some classic rock CDs I had made for us to listen to while drinking. I was growing increasingly happy, relaxed, slightly giddy. It felt as though the world was a wonderful place to be in, despite its flaws, that all would end well if it ended at all. I noticed that my heartrate quickened somewhat, that touch felt very good (though not as amazing as some people have told me), and that I had a moronic grin on my face that I could not keep away for long. The peak of these effects came near 12:15-12:30.
By this time, I had relaxed onto the bed in the room we were in, lying at the opposite end from J. and P. The music was very, very enjoyable, as was singing along to it. I found myself thirsty, so I drank a glass of water. Then I got a cup of ice cubes to suck on, these felt very pleasant, and were nice to crunch in my teeth. I had to urinate rather more often than usual, but the timing was difficult to judge as time seemed to be passing much slower than usual. Feelings of a deep-seated 'ok-ness' with everything ran through me. I felt almost like I was connected to some very deep, honest, and peaceful truth of the universe. I craved touch from a romantic interest (I have a rather serious one, though she lives several hundred miles away), though I did not feel impelled to try and find someone to snuggle with. At that point, just being held sounded like the best thing there could possibly be. The few feelings of jealousy I held towards J. (for his position with P.) practically evaporated, though I was envious of the fact that he had someone to share his experience with more deeply than I.
Nearing 1AM the effects were still going strong, but I could tell that they had peaked. J. mentioned that he knew where he might be able to get some molly, if we wanted to split another pill. It should be noted that J. and P. are used to doing 2-3 pills each, that J. is roughly my size with roughly my drinking tolerance, and that both of them had taken painkillers of unknown strength and composition (unknown to me, I didn't ask them. They had taken one of these PKs each) They were much more quiet than I, who was enjoying the sense of active wonder at everything. Sights looked cooler, sounds sounded more interesting. When I closed my eyes, I felt like I was wrapped in a warm blanket, though I was not. I had no desire to sleep, as it seemed J. and P. did. I had no desire for food of any sort.
Nearing 1:45, arrangements had been made to obtain one molly capsule to split. It arrived around 2AM, when I was feeling almost normal, but not quite. I was still happy, slightly giddy, and energized despite my lack of sleep. I did not feel manic in any way, simply not sleepy.
At two, the capsule was divided equally and snorted. This substance burned somewhat more than the first, and left a terrible taste in the back of my mouth. J. told me he felt it to be pure, judging by the taste. I did not feel as much of an immidiate boost as I did on the first pill, so I ran across to my apartment to get some more CDs and wait for the drug to kick in again. While I was checking my e-mail (rouhgly 5-10 minutes after snorting), I suddenly became aware that I was rolling again. I quickly grabbed my music (Pink Floyd- The Wall) and returned to P. and J., resuming my place on the bed. I put on the CD. Both of them were silent, though it was apparent that they were quite happy to be so. P. began to shiver slightly. We do not know if this has to do with drugs or the cold, as it was moderately chilly tonight and she gets cold easy. A blanket was given to her, and she stopped shivering after about 10 minutes.
Near 2:30, I felt I was peaking (though more weakly than the first time), and decided that I would try and find something interesting to do, rather than lie around in the dark, listening to music. I wanted action, talking, hugging people, more human contact than I was getting from P. and J. I left their apartment, walked around the complex to see what was going on, and didn't find anything of interest. I decided to return to my place (nearing 3AM now), and see if I could roust my love interest on the phone. I did, and we talked for about an hour. She had been drinking a little (hard to tell how much with her), though she noticed something was different about the way I was behaving. I found it more comforting than normal to speak to her, her voice sounded richer, more tuned in to what I was thinking. I found it difficult to fully concentrate on what she was saying unless it was particularly interesting, though I was really enjoying being on the phone. After a little while, things turned a bit romantic, which got my attention VERY fast. I was mostly over my second dose, but sexual stimulation felt veeeerrry good. I wish I had left P. and J. alone earlier, and investigated this while I was peaking.
Me and my girl talked for about an hour, placing us at 4 AM. It is nearly 6 AM now, and I have not slept in 24 hours, after 4 hours of sleep. I do not feel any ecstacy-like effects, though I am not unhappy in the least. I do feel a little... numb, perhaps, is the way to put it, though I suspect this is more from exhaustion than anything. I will be shortly going to bed and seeing if I can sleep, as I am beginning to feel that I NEED to, though I am not terribly tired. Generally, I do not take well to keeping hours like these. I have a slight suspicion that my second dose contained a speedy chemical, as my first didn't feel quite so restless as the second. Here I will end my current retelling of events and try to sleep.
--2:40 PM, the day after--
I woke up about half an hour ago.
Last night, as I was drifting off to sleep, it suddenly seemed to me that green things were REALLY deeply green, but no other colors had this effect applied to them. I woke up feeling tired, a touch dehydrated, but otherwise fine. I don't think I'm experiencing any of the massive depression side-effects I've heard about, though I did take a pretty small dose.
All in all, this was a very fun experience. It could've been more fun with closer friends and a higher dose, but I really enjoyed it. I will be doing it once more, when I can be around some closer friends, and so I can experience a higher dose.
As far as I can reccomend to people new to this drug, I think it's a good idea to dive in feet-first IF you know the quality of what you're doing. If you are certain it's good stuff, take a larger dose, and just enjoy it. I also recomend being with some good friends. I, myself, did not feel like dancing, though the few strangers I ran into seemed very, very nice. I think the remnants of the alcohol I had lent a mellowing effect to my dose, while the PKs my friends took seemed to almost knock them out. I've heard that pot can strongly enhance the visual side of ecstacy, and I think I felt the potential for this, as I'm fairly experienced with pot.
This was an excellent experience. I will repeat it, once or twice. If I suddenly get symptoms of a bad 'E hangover', that might change things, as this experience wasn't positive enough to make it worth a day or two of depression.
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