Citation: Wingrin. "Moon Candy & Portals: An Experience with LSD (exp25972)". Erowid.org. Apr 13, 2006. erowid.org/exp/25972
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I was involved in a consciousness raising group for 6 years which was an interesting mix of Kabbala, Astrology, Meditation, Hinduism the Occult & various new ageisms like Alice A. Bailey, which really left me connected to a higher energy source. Still, once at Point A I want to get to Point B, and I figured LSD would be the Ferrari I needed to get there.
I'd taken pot for a few years and had some amazing experience. Initially it was just high times but it morphed along with my studies into a tool that allowed me to access a place I ended up calling the concept room. I could feel balls of ideas all around me and it was just a matter of tapping in and experiencing the energy of the idea more than just words. They were like living powers. If for example I said Ying - Yang that would really be my whole brain tapping into an understanding of many concepts concurrently. Like having a bookful of advanced Physics knowledge instantly. Other experiences ranged from seeing the essence of people and not just what they showed on the surface, to experiencing energy connections between people. So in other words I was well primed.
After a long time of talking to other acid heads/meditation heads and reading a lot of psychedelicized literature I plunged in with a mate.
I had a couple of valiums as I was very nervous, invoked protection from my guides, and then popped a Red Dragon tab. It tasted sharp & bitter. After about an hour, my mate and I thought nothing was really going to happen so we ended up having another. Another hour later I disappointedly drove my mate home thinking I'd been sold duds.
Suddenly all the street lights were showing the 7 spectum rainbow bands of light and it felt like my feet were going through the floor of the car. My mate had exactly the same reaction and we continued through the rest of the trip synced up. We saw everything at the same time. We decided it had definatly kicked in and amid much hysterical laughter shambled back into his house.
Looking up the the moon, from his front lawn was the start of the trip in earnest. The moon seperated into 9 moons all interlinked with trinangles in a Mandala pattern. I turned to my friend and he was seeing it as well. I had the impression that the different moons were in different dimensions. Then streaming down from the Moon came what I felt to be the Lunar Lords. I couldn't perceive them clearly but they streamed down to me and their vibrations were like a test. By balancing with them, which involved overcoming terror, we were made to feel so increadibly balanced. Like young Gods on the town. Actors in the Cosmic Play, Riders on the Storm.
We entered his flat, and lit up a stick of incense. It broke apart into 3 sticks. Everything I really focused on seem to break apart into a physical, mental and astral form. Then we lit a candle. Around the flame formed a golden ring. The flame was being kept alive by this ring which pulsed with an electron like ball which did perfect orbits around it. The flame itself gave off sheets of coloured energy.
Around this time my friend got scared and went to the next room to sleep it off. Left to my own devices I watched the wallpaper kalidascope while understanding such concepts as why time doesn't really exist and thinking 'of course' all the while. At some point waterfalls of white mist-like energy was flowing over everything and all objects took on an infinite/eternal hue. Everything looked perfectly placed within itself and resonating with meaning and BEING.
At some stage I decided to see if I could walk through the wall. It seemed quite achievable at the time. So I place my hand through the mist on the nearest wall and focused all my attention on moving through it. After a short time the wall cracked open with what I can only describe as something like a translucent membrane being pushed aside which I could see at the edges of the portal. I was looking into a purple energy realm and there was a group of 8 beings looking at me. They were very friendly, shared a group mind, and had a good sense of humour. They appeared to have been waiting for me and one of them grabbed my hand in a handshake. The purple humonoid/cartoon/cyberlike energy being was inviting me to step in but was in no way pressuring me. I had the impression that they were the Violet Devas I had read about. The so-called Devas of Shadows locked into our evolutionary cycle who actually build this energy plane. Like cosmic set designers. I liked them a lot but felt that if I stepped into their realm I may not be able to come back. They themselves just looked on enigmatically awaiting my decision. I decided not this time.
After that I had some blurry spots. I must mention that I now no longer had a mind as such but more of point of attention which was now riding the A-Train to God knows where.
At some stage I heard my friend moaning in his sleep and I went in to investigate. What I saw was a group of shadows that I was impressed with as being lost souls. I saw that they were trying to enter my friends dreams because he had 'the lights on'. I could also see that they were stuck in a vast nothing dimension. I had the realization that everyone in this play/level/day-to-day world are blessed. Consciousness can exist on many different bands and the material world is like one narrow frequency. To be here is to be subject to the Reality that the Solar Logos chooses to create. It isn't Real as such but its like his company and we are the employees. Its a good company although we give up some soul freedom to reap the benefits.
Everyone and everything here is evolving because of this, while those lost souls were floating in a void of no-meaning and were without the level of creative energy needed to establish an authetic reality. This seems to require a mass of souls working in tandem. Think of it like the material cosmos being a coral reef in an ocean. Most of the ocean is void while the reef is teeming with life, a self enclosed system which supports & grows itself. Anyway I got scared and turned on the lights, which I now saw as representing the Solor Logos in some way. The shadows, as I knew instinctively, could not exist in the light and cried out pitifully and disappeared.
After some blank spells I can't recall, morning came and I felt like the Suns son. His energy seemed to be a part of me, lighting me up from within. Quite literally being en-light-ened. If I closed my eyes I saw an atomic white pulsating energy. It felt like my soul was made from this stuff.
My slack mates' girlfriend ended up driving me home. Once there I lay down to meditate and when I opened my eyes giant interlocked translucent molecular-like globes with 3-d Stars of David? were moving through the room. I have since seen such things in Vatican artworks in paintings of Saints having visions of Heavenly Hosts. Also they sound like the sacred geometry of the Seed of Life. I had the impression that all reality is relative and that all truth depends on perspective. Also that anything can be made manifest, everything is connected and that we are actually Gods but due to karma act out our lifes is set ways.
Suddenly, all along the wall translucent, dragons or skeletons (I honestly can't remember which) were moving with serpentine like motions. After a while I became scared of them. The instant that happened a fully clad knight appeared between us with visor down, & sword pointing down in front of him and standing at attention. I instantly became calm. In hindsight I feel that these images were archtypes as mentioned in the Tibetan Book of the Dead.
At this exact moment my then recent ex-girlfriend knocked on the door and looked after me. Although we had broken up she told me that she felt compelled to come and see me to see if I was OK as she sensed I was in trouble. This was good because I had been tripping now for 14hours with no sleep and starting to feel like it was never going to end. It continued for another 12hours or so, but with no more hallucinations, just wierd cold interal energy. Her touch at this stage was totally healing and I felt like Love is one of the strongest forces in the universe. It grounded me and helped me to come back.
I felt so far from the material frequency that it seemed strange that people could stay moored there some how in concencus reality.
I finally came back, but my reality had been shattered and it took years before I finally fully integrated the experience. In the meantime I suffered panic attacks, insomnia, disturbed sleep due to what seemed like astral attacks and alien invasions. Also I had occassional periods were I felt like I was going crazy and my psyche was under enormous unbearable pressure. Now when I look back on this I think maybe this was my ego's way of coming back into equalibrium, but then again. For years after I was hypersensitive to energy shifts and felt like I'd lost an energy cocoon of protection. I lost a few jobs during these years as I didn't really care about the material world so much.
These days I'm back to normal but I daily feel rushes of bliss energy when I'm near people. Not everybody, just now and then, and it doesn't matter who they are, age, sex, stranger, whatever. Also I've experienced phases of such extreme syncronicity that my life has seemed cartoonish. For example, I had an impression to go out of my way, go into this bookstore and pick up a book. I did this and the book I opened up said,'Sometimes people pick up books to receive messages'.
There seems to be a high degree of humour behind the coincidences. Some days it's been like life is a book with everything directly teaching me something. Also when I meditate now, on a good day, I can feel and remember what its like to be pure spirit. It feels like the essence of me but as a being that is intimatly connected to the universe in a very real energy sense. It also feels like I've been there many times, but life has a way of making me forget what I know. Ultimatly all this has made me a better person, but it really made me feel unhinged for a long time, which is emotionally exhausting.
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