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First Time's at Drunkard High
Alcohol (Malt Liquor)
Citation:   You Know Who. "First Time's at Drunkard High: An Experience with Alcohol (Malt Liquor) (exp2575)". Sep 8, 2000.

  oral Alcohol
It all started on a Saturday morning. I and two of my friends 'G' and 'A' had planned this for a week to get loaded and just have fun. I had heard all the stories about being drunk at school and said to myself 'I had to try this'. So I get up and go out for the whole morning coming back and recieving 'the call' from my friend. So I ask my Mom to take me over (I'm 15 yrs. old at this time) and she says to me 'Aren't you gonna eat dinner'. DAMN! This is what I didn't want as I want to keep my stomach empty, as I heard an empty stomach increases drunkeness. So i scarf down a small pizza and out the door I go.

I arrived at 'A's' house and he had some stuff to do so while he did that my other friend 'G' arrived with the booze by bike. On the list of liquids we had to consume it was:

Me = Colt .45 (1.5 Litres), 1 Vodka Juice bottle
A = Vodka (1 Pint), Pop Mix
G = Vodka Juice, Strawberry Darquiris

I had chosen Colt .45 because as a teenager I have very limited finances($5 for it). Plus there are stories of how 1 bottle of it gets you very 'plastered'. There is one very down side effect to it, its taste has been compared to 'rat piss'.

So once with got all together we went back to A's camp in the woods. We sat down on a stolen coach and matress' and started to drink. About a quater of the way through my bottle I said 'this ain't doin nothing'(I'm a pretty big guy so that may be a reason). So I started to walk out of the camp to get some air about 30 minutes into it. This is when it started to kick in, my vision went to slow motion as I turned my light-head. I soon sat down again, 'A' told a story about his brother opening a door and that just set us off laughing for about 4 minutes straight. As we consumed more liquids 'A' pulled out his combat knife and stabbed the coach, this bewilderd me so I tried it and laughed. 'G' not wanting to be left out took the knife and demolished a press-wood table with constant blows.

Warning: Don't keep sharp objects around drunks.

So as I get to the bottom quarter of the bottle we decide to go wander the community for fun. Before we could do that 'G' felt the need to climb the camp. Being made by 15 year old boys it wasn't the safest structure. As soon as he reached the roof a 18' inch diameter log with a spike in it came crashing down missing my head with the nail striking the bottle. Out of my superior judgement all I cold say was 'My Colt!' as I picked up the the bottle and drank the remaining contents.

It is now 1 hour into the experiences and we try to make our way out of the woods so we start to walk and come to a 70 degree climb. My friend made it up no problem where as my body chooses the prime time to give out half way up. As i tumbled down the gravel slate filled path I skinned my palms and landed on my belly. I made a seconded attempt and ended crawling up the path.

As we came to the streets my friends told me to act 'cool' as to not alert neighbors. I said okay, but it seemed my way of doing this involved tellin my body directly out loud. As we walked down the street I was playing therapist with my body. Once that was done I noticed that my view was slanted and I realized my walk was off as I tripped over a crub onto some guys lawn.

Strangley, during this whole experience there was two 'me's' one being the wacked out drunk, and the other being the sensible scientific mind. For about a half hour I tried to comprehend this phenomenah through words but to no avail. As we walked some more we came along a 11 yr. old kid on a bike. We started to talk for a while and convinced him to come to the woods with us. When we arrived we gave him two shots of vodka. Well, this gave us another companion to roam the night with. We tried riding his bike but ended up leaning and only going in circles.

We soon took to the streets again and we with me walking ability soon tumbled over another curb, only this time it led to a ditch where only my head submerged into a small swamp. As I pulled my soaked head out of the marsh my friends just laughed. So we continued to walk around until 'A' decided to go in so then it was left to 'G' and me to walk home. We took this time to sober up but not before stealing some guys bags of leaves and throwing it off a bridge.

So I finally made it to a phone where I called my Dad to pick me up. I still had a small buzz but not much as I got into the car. My Dad asked me why I was coming home so I made up some excuse bout 'A' getting into a fight with his brother. We got home and as I tried to walk up my steps inside the house where i fell. Luckily my Dad wasn't in yet and i quickly went to the bathroom. That's when I saw IT. Half of my hair was sticking up in mow-hawk fashion. It was from the marsh incident and it had hardened into a point and I had been driven home like that.

So I deduced that my parents knew i now drank so I said 'use it to your favour' and now I do it about once every 4 months.

Exp Year: 1999ExpID: 2575
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Sep 8, 2000Views: 58,415
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Alcohol (61) : Small Group (2-9) (17), First Times (2)

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