Citation: DownTrodden. "Smiles, Voices, Tongues: An Experience with Adderall (exp22714)". Erowid.org. Feb 22, 2006. erowid.org/exp/22714
Between the times of 7 and 7:30 I consumed 3 separate 20mg pills of Adderall. The experience to follow would be my first to date using any form of speed. I didn't know what I was in for.
7:00- consumed my first pill. I had been reading lots on amphetamines and had a general idea as to what to expect. I offer a pill to my companion who was with me, but he turns it down. I contemplate taking a second pill, or just dropping that one for my first time.
7:10- Barely noticing effects. My impatience urges me to take another, to be sure I tweak. I comply with the temptation.
7:30- Im noticing some increased concentration, brighter colors. Effects are only a tad bit noticeable. I figure, 'I only have one pill left, i don't want to carry it around. Might as well drop it, then I'll definitely trip.' I do what my thought process guides me to do, and swallow that orange motherfucker.
7:50- Got into an argument about politics with the dad of the friend whose house im staying at. Now im starting to really notice the physical effects. I can't hold still whatsoever.
8:00- In a car going to a local band concert with some friends(me and my friend got picked up from his house by his sister). I start talking about how much I love Elliot Smith, and in the car was another elliot smith fanatic, and we start talking about how wonderful his song writing is. I get way too excited and keep cutting her off. No one knows that I have taken 60mg of amphetamines(except for my friend, but he thought i only took 20mg).
8:10-9:00 - We're at the venue. A bunch of my friends are there, but I'm afraid the drug will seriously kick in really soon. I decide to just lay out of conversations and add a remark here or there. Most of the stuff I say I don't even think about, just whatever comes off the top of my head. 90% of it is stupid shit, that type of statement where people just look at you. I decide to go over and sit with the girl who was also into elliot smith. We'll call her B. B and I have been good friends since the beginning of this year, and we commence in a discussion about how strange the whole concept of human emotion is. I start to feel really comfortable with her(not sexually, just socially).
9:05-9:40 - I wander around, mostly sticking with B, but sometimes going to join another group. I speak with some lady friends I have from school. I was being hilarious with them. My main goal that night was to get play by this girl M, but B kind of distracted me from that. No matter, hanging with B was better.
9:40-10:40- Band plays. Oh yes. Oh my god yes. This music is so great. I love dancing to it. I stay for their whole set and dance to EVERY song. It's great to be able to rock to these guys. I do a lot of thinking while they're playing too. I decided that I need to be more confident with what I do. I realized that I didnít care how I looked or about anything really when flowing on this drug, I need to start feeling like that sober. I swear that I won't rely on speed to give me confidence, and promise to myself that I'd only do speed every month or perhaps longer(i'm thinking longer due to that latter part of the experience).
Nothing can annoy me. The most irritating kid in my grade is talking to me, and I just politely nod and agree. I accept everyone for who they are, and I treat them all with kindness, because I realize that (almost) everyone deserves to be treated that way. I look at the band members, and think how good they are and how much joy they're giving to their audience and I feel warmed by that. I've been wearing a smile, showing all my teeth for the past 3 hours. I've been so happy and social, and it was so awesome just talking with all these people. I also felt like I truly connected with B. And no one knew I was high on anything.
10:45 - Show ends. I desperately want to go an after show party, but I couldnít get a ride back, so I call my mother to ask to go to B's. She refuses. I'm kind of angry because I desperately wanted to be with people and be social, I wont be able to stand staying locked up in my room for the rest of the night while high on these magnificent pills.
11:20-4:00 am - I guess Iím going to have to stand sitting locked up in my room, I wasnít able to go anywhere after the show. I go on the internet and just talk to everyone on my buddy list. I play some Amon Tobin. My foot keeps on twitching. It will do this from this point until the time when Iím writing this(roughly 12 hours later). I have deep/entertaining/thoughtful conversations with all of the people on my buddy list. At 4, I decided I'd masturbate then go to sleep.
4:00-4:10 - Man, masturbation fucking rocks while on this. I guess my blood is pumping faster, maybe I get more circulation everywhere(just a hypothesis).
4:15-5:00 - Hell, absolute hell. O god is this terrible. I've had to get up numerous times to take these ENORMOUS pees(30 seconds +). And I'm just chugging bottled water. My throat is so dry. The twitch I had in my left foot KEEPS on going. If I start singing a song in my head, my left foot will unconsciously start tapping the quarter note rhythmns. My thoughts and my own brain, are the scariest things right now. I am not able to fall asleep only drift off into these half awake-half asleep dreams where the voices in the dreams would just get so loud and they'd sound so real that I'd actually think there was someone yelling. During one of my pee/water walks I came up with the idea to play soft music to numb out the voices and hopefully lull me to sleep.
5-6 - It worked!!! I can't hear the voices, but still my attempts to sleep are futile. I keep on fidgeting, desperately trying to find a comfortable position on my bed. An hour passes, and I decide to turn the music off because it was becoming distracting. Still, my attempts to fall asleep are of to no avail. All hope was lost when the sun began shedding its first rays upon this quiet ocean front community. I knew I wouldnít be able to get to sleep.
6-8:30 - I lie in bed, in disbelief that I had stayed up the entire night when I had a lacrosse game later that day. Iím fucked, I think to myself. My foot twitches. I have also horribly scraped the sides of my tongue by sucking spit down my throat every 15 seconds for the past 6 hours.
8:30-?- I force cereal down my throat. I chew it with my torn tongue. I gulp down the paste, and feel it drop into my nauseated belly. I go shopping with my mother for clothes, and actually have a nice time just talking with her in the car, listening to some more Amon Tobin. I start to feel a bit of energy revitalized in my shaken and worn body. Later I have lunch, and it is extremely difficult to eat. I can only finish half of my BLT. I do drink LOTS of fluid though, I find myself constantly thirsty. How ever in the world will I play lacrosse today? My foot is still twitching a little bit.
Conclusion: Iím really, really happy I had this experience. I had wanted to try a new substance for quite some time and Iím glad I was able to. I learned lots from this drug, and it surprisingly enough offered me insight onto my own character. I had not read any other report where it did that, but I have not read all the reports. My foot still twitches. It taps the beat as I type(Iím typing in 16th notes according to my foot). Amphetamines, I feel, are used too lightly by the majority. I think it could serve as a great tool when used in higher doses, less often. Iím not able to understand how people can be addicted to this substance. I find the after effects too much to bare, maybe thatís because I took such a large amount for a first time user. I suggest you take into consideration the information I just put in front of you, gather more information from other reports and ask yourself if you feel you should have a taste of the renowned drug known as adderall.
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