Citation: smasher. "Swimming with Bacteria and Beyond Evil: An Experience with 5-HTP & LSD (exp21922)". Erowid.org. Dec 30, 2004. erowid.org/exp/21922
What I saw this night, I have decided to write about, is beyond comprehension, but some of it can be put into words.
I was at my house, which is in a rural area, alone. It was nighttime, and I planned on having a good solo trip. I had acquired 10 'windowpane' gel tabs of good quality lsd. I had the next day off, so I wasn't concerned about how I would feel the next day. A week before, I had tried 1 of them at a party. It was strong, with good visuals, social anxiety, some good body vibes, and mystical thinking.
I turned on some trance/house music. I had a plan of visiting another world, I knew I could because of my sample of the magic the week earlier. I had been taking 5-htp for depression. I took it in the morning at about 10am.
At 10pm, after thinking of a dose, popped 7 of them. I let them partially dissolve in my mouth and then swallowed them. I will try to put what happened next in a linear time perspective, but these are estimates, and at some points are rough guesses.
20 minutes later, I feel that tingle, the stimulating, awakening vibes of acid. The rush is quite strong, I shiver. I lay back on the couch, squeezing a rubbery 'stress ball'. Light visuals start, I see the dim room light up some.
At 10:45, the walls, ceiling and floor are breathing, warping, melting and swirling, some with extra color. The music sounds distant, but it feels like it has physical contact with me. I feel nervous, it definately feels too intense to be completely comfortable. But, I smile at the new, changing environment. My thoughts separate and manifest into observations of my life at such a different angle, the thoughts flood my mind and I try to tune them out.
11:30? I have thrown up yellowish green stuff on the floor. I am still on the couch. I walked around briefly but found the environment around the couch to feel more right. I put my fingers in the substance. It was slightly warm. I begin to loose comprehension of who I am. This is where words become hard to use. I think I close my eyes and I am in a lake, surrounded by millions of bacteria. I see them so detailed, large, brown, jelly things swimming with hundreds of flagella. I am one of them. I am comfortable with this, because the life is simple and there isn't any immediate worries. I am not thinking. I only see, and feel. The presence of the music in the background adds to the idea of peacefulness in my bacterium life.
12? Something goes wrong with my feelings of peace. The devil turned my water red with death. He seeks to harm. I wake up into my body. What the fuck is this, I think without using language, because language is gone. 'This body, my hands! so complex...' The idea of evil after me still is there. I am now a spirit floating unwillingly from random body to body. My thinking is of pure defense, and this is a rough interpretation. I get up off the couch. WINDOWS! they cheat reality, they trick reality, the devil could see that my fortress here is not of normal nature. (I am not sure completely of my thoughts). I get up and grab a stick of reality material, which happened to be a fireplace rod. I go smashing windows and glass. I strike them like they tried to kill me. I wasnt sure who I was but I was taking steps to protect it.
2: I wake up on the couch, was I asleep? I dont know what happened. My normal consciousness is slightly returning with my confused ego. I do not recall the window breaking. I get up and feel cold and then see the mess. OH shit! I dont know what happened. I think that I did it, but there are paranoid thoughts about an evil that has been chasing me. I see light visuals only now. I recall a time when the music was invisible globs of brilliance, and when they hit me they burst color all over.
4: after laying on the couch a while, I think to myself, I'm going to enjoy this trip, and ignore the horrible mess until I am sober. If I closed my eyes, I could voluntarily enter a trance with some hazy visions.
1pm: I wake up, feeling terrible. My back, my stomach, my head, my mood, all hurting. I look at the window near the couch. This sinks my stomach. I get up and head for the shower, noticing on the way a broken picture frame. It was about 50^F outside, and it all came in. I feel a little better after the shower. Then I review the damage. Later I put plastic sheeting over the windows and cleaned up the glass, getting cut 3 times.
6 Windows broken (3 small, 2 larger ones, and a glass door :(, and 2 picture frames). I also had oddly turned the computer keyboard and monitor face down.
This night was madness, insanity, craziness. Some of the memories are lost. I wouldnt regret it at all if it wasnt for the property damage. But, the rational way of thinking disappears too much for this dose, I imagine 2 hits of this stuff would severely impair someone.
I will never trip this hard again. This happened last week, I still feel weird and see light tracers. Its not like I can take a bunch of acid and go crazy and loose identity of everything I know of, and not have lasting side effects, possibly permanent. I sure hope I return to normal. I think the 5-htp increased the trip, and made it different than usual, but I cant put my finger on what.
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