Odd, Yet Disappointing...
Citation: Quique. "Odd, Yet Disappointing...: An Experience with Diphenhydramine (exp21049)". Erowid.org. Dec 8, 2005. erowid.org/exp/21049
I am, by nature, a very curious person. For the past 2 years, perhaps a little longer, almost all of my curiosity has been intensely focused on magic, the nether realms, other dimensions, aliens, and generally odd mystical things. My specific underlying goal was to enter another dimension, the nether realm, OR have a being from those places visit me. I then wanted to learn things which are currently beyond my ability to learn, such as how to fly/levitate, become invisible, etc. This wasn't as time consuming as you might think, because I have no addictive tendencies, and so any 'trips' I had or tried to have were few and far between.
One day I was researching Tree Datura/Brugmansia, and as I scrolled down through the list of psychoactive chemicals, I saw Benadryl, accompanied by more than a handful of experience reports. I blinked a few times, thought to myself 'No way, I have Benadryl in my medicine cabinet.' I clicked on it, and was amazed. Hallucinations? More than that, the hallucinations were described as extremely realistic, so that occasionally the user had no idea that he/she was even tripping. This sounded excellent and interesting to me, as I figured I could control any hallucinations that came. One morning when I was the only one home all day, I decided to run an experiment. I settled on 350 mg as a reasonable but large enough dose, and at exactly noon I took 14 of the little pink and white capsules. I didn't expect anything for an hour or two, so I lay on my bed and read magazines and then a book.
1:00pm - I noticed an odd feeling, nothing way out of the ordinary, but just a slight restlessness and awareness of my body. This was not revelatory or exciting or intense, it was just barely noticeable.
2:00pm - The awareness of my body metamorphosed gradually into a feeling of weight, or possibly momentum, despite the fact that I wasn't moving. Then at 1:30pm it 'hit me' and I felt like I weighed a good 50-100 pounds heavier. I still had muscle control, it was just impaired by my extra 'weight'. I didn't stop reading however, I decided to wait till I saw a person or something out of the ordinary, which I would know to be a hallucination (there was nobody home and nobody would be home for 6 hours). This did not happen, but the book got boring, and my mouth was dry, so I got up to get a glass of water. Walking was harder but by no means impossible, and once again I felt like I had momentum.
3:00 pm - No hallucinations whatsoever. Nothing, in fact, but a very very dry mouth, and the feeling that I suddenly weighed 200 pounds. The dry mouth was obviously due to a diuretic effect that Benadryl appears to have in large doses: I had to take a piss every half hour, and by the third or fourth one, it was completely clear.
3:30 pm - Nothing exciting had happened and I didn't feel like it was just getting started, like I sometimes do with Morning Glory Seeds. Rather, it felt like I had just missed something, and I kind of felt like I wanted to sleep. I wasn't tired, but it seemed more interesting than sitting and waiting for something to happen. I lay down in my bed, and closed my eyes. My mind wasn't filled with random thoughts, as it typically is as I'm trying in vain to go to sleep. I soon slipped into a hynagogic state: right between sleeping and wakefullness, when spontaneous but still somewhat rational thoughts get spun into quasi-dreams, which I soon wake up out of because I realize that these are thoughts in my head and not actual reality. I had quite a lot of quasi-dreams, and in fact never really slept, just quasi-dreamed while still just a loud noise or conscious thought away from opening my eyes. Once or twice I vaguely thought I heard a voice or someone call my name, but when I said 'Yes?' or 'Hello?' nobody answered and if it was a hallucination, it did not go any further than a mere voice. This proceeded till around 4:30, when my little brother and sister arrived home, along with their babysitter.
5:00pm - I decide to get up and wander downstairs, perhaps eat, and just generally interact with my siblings. I hoped that perhaps they were actually realistic hallucinations, but this turned out not to be so. I went about my typical activities, and I had a general pang of hunger in my stomach. I ate, but this did not do anything to relieve the feeling of being hungry. I didn't eat any more than I usually would, and I decided that it must be the benadryl making me think I was hungry. I then tried to read. My eyes were previously working just fine, but when I would try and read, they would slowly slip out of focus. At first, I just blinked a few times and 'stretched' my eyes, and they would go back into focus. However, they would slip back out of focus within 10-20 seconds, making reading extremely tedious. I glanced up and around the room to see if any other visual problems were noticed, but I could see everything else just fine. When I glanced back to my book, my eyes focused perfectly. However, once again 20 seconds later the words got blurred and out of focus. From then on, I had to stare at large things or the wall or anything but the book for a few seconds to give my eyes the ability to focus on small words for 10 seconds at a time. This got tiresome, so I quit reading and decided to watch a movie.
6:30pm - I watched a movie, specifically, a stand-up comedy act by Bill Hicks. I had no comprehension problems, I could see everything just fine, the only differences from normal reality were my insatiable [thirst, drymouth, urge to urinate], a feeling of heaviness or unplaceable momentum, and the vague feeling that speaking took effort. I don't remember if this was in my dreams or in the time when I was awake, but I do remember that I spoke a lot less because I had a physical resistance. My throat didn't want to speak, and my mind wasn't particularly interested in fighting about it, because it was mellow and placid. I COULD speak, it didn't hurt or anything, I just didn't really want to. Also, I felt mildly melancholy/depressed, etc. Throughout the rest of the evening I felt all the above mentioned effects, but none of them was particularly incapacitating or interesting. In all truth, it was a rather boring experience, compared to shrooming or even just smoking weed. I had no trouble going to sleep, as a matter of fact I went to bed rather early (9:30 or 10:00pm as I recall). Waking up this morning was neither hard nor easy, just typical. I did notice two things today though: my quadriceps were noticeably sore, as if I actually HAD weighed 200 pounds yesterday, and I also feel a tiny bit more appreciative of music, once again nothing extreme or wonderful, just noticeable.
Overall, it was disappointing, because I was hoping to spice up my day with something other than slightly impaired reality. Perhaps I just lack the sensitivity to it that other people have. Usually I'm pretty sensitive to plant/herb drugs, although Morning Glory seeds have yet to impress me, despite following several different procedures for eating/drinking them. If I'm looking for easily available legal stuff, DXM (Robitussin/Tussin: Maximum Strength Cough) will give me the 'body high' and it feels much better all around. Nutmeg is extremely intense in large doses (25-35g), it also lasts for 3 days. Other than being semi-sedative, Benadryl really isn't worth much, at least to me.
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