Citation: A. "Enveloped By All Of Nature: An Experience with LSD (exp1978)". Erowid.org. Jun 20, 2000. erowid.org/exp/1978
||(pill / tablet)
.... I doubt very seriously that I've done acid that much.... or any psychedelics for that matter. I've tried mushrooms, LSD and peyote. I have heard that some people use LSD in psycho-therapy. I saw a television show, where I believe it was Dianne Carrol (the woman who was married to Vic Dimonne) was talking about how she was tripping on acid whilst in therapy, and that the doctor perscribed it to her for this purpose. I didn't realise that they had the alt.drugs, and alt.drugs.psychedelics... etc. I'll have to check them out one day.
My story. Hmmm, okay. Let's see.
The first time I actually did acid was in a little tablet, and I believe it was called 'white lightning'. When I was in college, I was living in Baltimore, and I got involved in a band. The 'head' of this particular band was named C, he was 26, and was dating a groupie girlfriend who was 14. C had a pretty big ego, as I remember. He was always the head of the band, and wanted to play lead guitar, and sing. He also wanted us to play all his original music, but he really wasn't very good. C and I usually ended up trading lead, and I was usually encouraged by the other band members to do more, much to C's chagrin. Anyway, C had bought a house west of the city, in Woodlawn. It was a very old, very large house, and he was trying to get the other band members to move in and pay him rent. The problem was that they all moved in but none of them paid rent.
There were several teen-aged kids in the neighbourhood who enjoyed hanging around that house. Of course they would with all the drugs, sex and rock n roll going on there. I went over there one evening, ( It was the summer after I graduated, so I would have been 21... 1980). Someone had this white lightning, and offered it to me. I had always been frightened of doing hallucinogens because marijuana affected me so strongly. I thought that LSD would put me in a mental hospital, but for some reason, because I had finished school, and had yet to really start working or being responsible, I figured ... what was the worse thing that could happen? I would be committed? Ah, no problem. Of course, before I actually ate the stuff, I discussed it for a long time with one of the other band members. He told me about how things would look different, and how I would see trails, etc. So I ate one of the tablets, and nothing seemed to happen for a very long time. I ended up going for a walk with one of the neighbourhood girls to go buy beer, and when we came back, the others had gone off somewhere, and they didn't come back till late that evening, so it was just me and her. I think she also did some acid. I honestly didn't feel like anything was happening, except the radio was on, and they were advertising a horror movie.
The advertisment came on about every 2.5 minutes, so it seemed, and it had the line in it, 'It's only a movie, it's only a movie' This ad gradually became more and more ridiculous sounding to me until I found myself putting one of my socks on my hand and making a puppet out of it, getting under the table and holding the sock up so that my companion could see it, and mouthing it to the commercial everytime it came on. I remember at this point, I was laughing so hard, tears were streaming down my face, and I couldn't stop. She looked at me, and said 'you can't tell me you aren't tripping.' I swore I wasn't. After all, I wasn't seeing what I thought were hallucinations. Finally, I calmed down, and she and I sat quietly and talked. She was wearing fingernail polish that was clear, but shiny, suddenly, I started to notice that when she moved her arms about, making gestures, I was able to see the trails following her fingertips. I think this was when I realised that everything around me was different. It was like being in a whole different universe. Everything even looked pristine, and alive.
At one point, we went outside, it was dark out by now, and I remember looking at the street, and being aware of how the street sparkled. I had never noticed this before. Then I looked at the sky, and it looked like dark blue foil, sort of like foil wrapping paper, not the shiny kind, but the matte, etched kind. The textured foil wraping paper you buy. I suppose I tend to be a person who is very much geared toward the visual, the spiritual, and maybe a little, the philosophical, but all the visual changes I was noticing made me ecstatic. I remember also becoming extremely aware of tactile changes. There was a gentle breeze that night. I felt the breeze kiss my skin, and it was almost orgasmic. I almost felt as though I had been touched by God. I felt like I was being enveloped by all of nature.
I remember sitting on the front steps, enjoying all these new sensations, then looking at a few long blades of grass that were blowing in the breeze. I started to believe they were alive *and* aware, and that they were't just blowing in the breeze but were stretching toward me, reaching out to me. I remember reaching over to touch these blades of grass, then suddenly becoming aware that I was in the midst of so much life. I began to feel like I was so connected with all of life and nature. I think, at that moment, I never felt more alive. I think somehow during this trip, I also became more aware of my own *im*mortality. I seem to remember thinking about dying, and for the first time, it didn't really scare me because I seemed to be aware that my soul somehow transcended anything physical....that in some way, and I didn't know exactly in what way, that I would always exist. I felt very thankful that God had put me on earth so that I may experience the pleasures of having a body, and being able to see beauty, and to hear music, and to experience physical love and sensuous touch, which I feel are physical manifestations of the spirit. I feel humans are as creative as we are because we have a soul, it's our soulful outlet.
Anyway, the last time I tripped was, I think about 1985. By this time, I had joined the rat race in a big way. I had bought a condominium, and was working. I began to realise that I really couldn't do this anymore. My life was no longer free and uncomplicated. When I would try to trip, I would find myself becoming bogged down with worrisome thoughts... such as getting the bills payed, making sure I did my tasks at work, suddenly there was just too much responsibility, and I felt I really needed to keep my mind sharp. Of all the drugs I had done in my life, the only one I would like to do again if I got the chance would be acid. I loved the way it made me think about things, and I know there were a lot of earth-shattering conclusions that I had made on some of my trips... many of them were forgotten by the time the trip was over. I loved the way it enhanced the enjoyment of listening to music, or listening to crickets, or listening to the breeze. In some ways, I think that death is something like this. I think that with death, because you are no longer tied to physical binds, you become much more one with the universe, and you become tuned into the true power and beauty of existance, but not in a physical way ......Ahh.... but I'm rambling. ( I tend to do this... must be all that LSD I ate. ; ) )...
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