Citation: Mike Endanmous. "Pure Light: An Experience with Ketamine (exp1962)". Erowid.org. Jun 19, 2000. erowid.org/exp/1962
I've heard some talk of Ketamine on this group, and thought a first-person account might interest some of you.
My drug history: I'm a very experienced pot smoker, have drunk alot of alocohol, tripped on LSD about 10 times, and tried some MDA, mushrooms, coke, opiates, X, amphetamines. I'm coming off a 5-month hiatus wherein I've avoided drugs.
I tried to get some info from the net gurus as to what a correct dosage of Ketamine would be, but never got a response. So I guesstimated, and took 4 mL of Ketaset (equal to 400mg Ketamine HCl). I had an empty stomach. I took it orally, pouring it down my throat with a spoon - I had heard that it tasted awful, which it did, so I avoided my tongue, and chased it down with an immediate mouthful of orange. No problem. In retrospect, this was a good dose for me, I had a great trip. When I toom it it was 7pm.
I was surprised, and a bit scared, when I got the first whoosh of effect already 15 mins later, at 7:15, and 5 mins after that I was totally gone. This was scary because I had been assuming that like LSD or X or Mushrooms or orally ingested cannabis there would be a gradual increase of the effect over the first couple hours, and I basically wouldn't feel anything for the first 45 minutes; so I was worried that I had taken way too much, since I was feeling so much so soon. What I was feeling at this point: very disoriented, normal reality had just disappeared, physically dizzy and unable to walk without bumping against walls, a bit of paranoia that I was going to die because I had taken way too much (this never got out of hand), mixed with periodic flashes wherein my surroundings would hang motionless and appear really beautiful and I felt totally painless. I went out on the balcony in a t-shirt (very cold yesterday) and the cold felt very distant. I was a bit irked at this point that my housemates weren't looking out for me more closely, since although I wasn't about to do it, I felt that jumping off the balcony wasn't that bad! (In all fairness to them, they really didn't know it was affecting me yet, this was only 15 mins after I took it). And sounds were incredibly amplified - I felt like I was in a machine shop or factory. This is what clued in my housemates, when I came in and asked if they too could hear 'that noise', or was it just my buzz. I was pretty confused about what was real. I was too dizzy to stand up, I crashed out on the living room cushions. I started to space on the cieling, which was flowing. I was cold. I cautioned my friends that they should keep a close eye on me because I might die without them noticing - I couldn't feel if I was breathing (they were watching me the whole time). I could hear them talking but couldn't respond. I had asked for the newest William Burroughs cd to be put on, but it was weirding me out, so I asked for some more normal dance music. Anyway, this period lasted for about an hour, not that pleasant, but probably not as unpleasant as it sounds, it was interesting to me even at the time.
I started to feel much more in control, I started to feel physically really warm, I could talk but it was much nicer to just kind of curl up and feel cozy. I was basically under the impression that the trip was over already, 1 hour later, I felt my thoughts very settled and normal. I decided to go lie in bed under my comforter -- I was still extremely dizzy when I stood up. It was here that the real trip started for me. The next 2-3 hours were totally amazing. I just lay completely motionless and very warm under my comforter. My thoughts were very clear, and I could basically guide my trip in whatever direction I wanted. Most of the time I felt like a pure light that could flow like lava and make sweet guitar-distortion sounds, I was burning very bright. I could just 'be' in this state, it felt beautiful. Other times I would have conscious thoughts, I would note that I felt godlike, I would love myself, it was great. When I'd think of my friends I'd feel very warm, but the couple times I tried explaining to them how I was feeling (I had to get up and piss quite a few times, was still dizzy), I felt the words totally inadequate, and I'd lose the feeling. I realized that it was best to save the feelings till later, and just enjoy it myself while it lasted. Unlike LSD/mushrooms, there was none of the physical on-edge feelings, my body felt very warm/snug/relaxed, and I could completely ignore it, I felt bodyless. And the trip was less idea-based and more feeling-based, sort of like X (except I've never done X by myself, always w/ a friend).
This phase ended at around 11, and things started to get much less trippy. I was in a really excellent mood, but I still felt really dizzy when I stood up, so I had to lie down continuously. We went to some friends' party nearby, I wanted to do some socializing (did it all while lying on the floor). Walking around, crossing the street, climbing stairs were very difficult. Got progressively more burnt out, felt weaker, never lost the dizzy sensation, they took me home and I went to sleep at 1:30. Woke up today at 10, and feel good. Psychologically, I'd say I feel great, I feel alot of warmth towards everyone around me, and toward myself, a real pleasant afterglow and fondness. However, I still feel a slight dizziness. On the whole, I feel alot less drained than after a good acid trip, again sort of like an X 'day after' psychologically, but with the mild dizziness.
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