Citation: Eeyore. "Space Cadet Glow: An Experience with Methadone (ID 19128)". Erowid.org. Mar 22, 2006. erowid.org/exp/19128
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I'm in no ways a regular user of opiates, opioids or any other substances, besides alcohol - I do not enjoy cannabis. I indulge in alcohol 1-2 times a week, usually by drinking the equivalent of 16-20 bottles of beer and buzzing hard as a result. I have been prescribed opioids a few times in the past as painkillers for various illnesses - Oxycodone in the form of Percocet 5/325 and Hydrocodone 7.5/500mg APAP generic product. These have been isolated incidents (I guess I got lucky with the doctors, because the ailments were minor.) Other than these prescriptions, I have never taken an opioid before. I have found Oxycodone an incredible pain killer and inducer of wonderful euphoria while using it to treat my real pain.
A few months ago, I had a terrible hangover after couple of days of binge-drinking with my friends. I had been downing gin & tonics and hard liquor like water. Even the standard double Excedrin hangover-treatment that I usually give myself didn't do anything, and after a day of suffering, I was still very sick. I did happen to remember that I had a few generic Hydrocodones left from my last prescription, and looked them up on the net, still remembering the positive effects of Oxy. I decided it would be safe to take them (concluding that there shouldn't have been any alcohol left in my system at this time.) and proceeded to take 15 mg total. An hour later, I was off to that opiate-induced euphoria once again. It felt like wonderful waves of warm sea water were slowly rolling over my body. This was about six months after my last use of Hydrocodone as a medicine. I remembered again what it could do and while buzzing, made the conscious decision to seek for more opioids, and to use them as an alternative
recreational drug - after all, if they could give me this feeling, why would I keep destroying my brain cells and liver by binge-drinking, just to get a relaxing buzz going? (My work is very stressful, so I really appreciate the relaxing effects of alcohol.)
Now, back to my story. I have some acquaintances that are quite well connected to several people who indulge themselves in the worlds of mind-altering substances. I've never acquired anything through them before, but now I took the opportunity to talk them about opioids in private. A friend of mine told me that he had access to a supply of Methadone, with Percs or Vicodins harder to come by for him. Obviously one of his good friends was under Methadone maintenance treatment or taking it for serious pain and willing to part with some of his medication. We also chatted about the good effects of Hydrocodone, and both agreed it could be a wonderful recreational substance if used correctly.
I read everything I could find on opioids and opiates, and considered trying to obtain more prescriptions for Oxy or Hydro. However, I also told my friend to go ahead and pick up Methadone for me. He did, and I got several pills marked '54' with a line and '142' under it. Checking the pills on the net I was convinced that this was the real deal, and made sure that I understand the effects, the time and dosage correctly. Being non-tolerant to opioids, I was extremely worried about getting the dosage right.
Finally, the Friday arrived that I had chosen for the experience. I was tired after a long week of heavy work, but excited that I would be having this new experience that night. Proceeding to eat just a few sandwiches and drinking water the whole day, I broke one of the 54/142 pills in half and took one half (5 mg) at 6 pm exactly (this way I could easily track the elapsed time, even if I would be messed up or drowsy.) For two hours, I proceeded to follow the brainwashing generously provided by the television networks and waiting for the effects to arrive. About one hour after taking the dose, I felt very slight effects, so slight that they could have been just placebo: relaxation of muscles and very minor numbness.
After almost exactly two hours of taking the dose, I really started feeling it. Relaxation, pain-killing effects (my shoulder had been hurting all day) and just general good feeling. No euphoria, no buzz yet. I decided to go to bed, as on my earlier experiences I would feel the effects more profoundly if derived from other sensory disturbances. It seemed to help this time as well. I was now positively having a slight opioid-buzz, with those small waves of pleasure, like coming in soaked from cold and rainy weather and sitting next to a warm fireplace. Nothing in the world mattered. My shoulder pain was there, and wholly irrelevant. I felt very good, very mellow and completely satisfied.
I put on some early Pink Floyd on the CD changer and proceeded to roll around in bed, just enjoying the feeling. However, the buzz subsided quite fast, and at around T+3 hours, I was convinced that I should take the other half of the pill to bring my dose up to full 10 mg. I had read that the initial onset of effects would take 2-3 hours, so I was sure that I was peaking by now. Taking the other 5 mg, bringing the full dose to 10 mg, I continued chatting with friends on the Internet. After about 2 or 3 hours of very slight or non-existent effects, I started feeling another come-on. More buzzing, I had to put my computer away and just enjoy the feeling.
I was in a dreamlike state, awake yet not fully awake, dreaming but not really sleeping. Very relaxing, all my worries and stress were completely meaningless and something I could just smile at, and ignore. I was having very compassionate feelings towards the world, towards my lovely and intelligent ex-girlfriend and even towards my enemies.
I alternated between buzzing, rolling in bed in this dreamlike state and chatting with friends on the computer. This continued until about 3 am in the morning, at which time I was starting to feel extremely tired. I had been awake (although lot of it in bed) for close to 21 hours now. I wanted to sleep. I was also a little hungry. I made myself a few salami sandwiches, downed them with a non-caffeine soda and I turned in to bed, hoping to get some real sleep this time around. After spending some time lying around, I buzzed quite heavily whenever I closed my eyes. I thought to myself 'this Methadone sure stays on long, just like they said... up to 24 hours...' Other opioids I had experienced would have long since stopped affecting me. For the first time I found the thought of staying buzzed for 24 hours slightly irritating. I started worrying about going to sleep, afraid that the Methadone would slow down my respiration, and that I wouldn't wake up. This of course spiraled into a thought pattern where I started monitoring my own breathing, convinced it was slower than usual and trying to measure my pulse and so on.
The more I thought about it, the more paranoid I got, one of those self-feeding prophecies of doom. Somebody more experienced with Opioids would probably have just gone to sleep and woken up feeling wonderful. However, I was by this time very paranoid and kept myself awake. I should mention that I also get extremely paranoid during hang-overs, and I think paranoia is a psychological problem that I sometimes encounter. Not strong enough to stop me from performing great in every-day life, but sure enough quite scary when it really gets going.
In my paranoid state, I logged back on to the computer, chatted some more, watched TV and generally just decided to kill time. I realized that there was no way that I could stay awake for the whole time that the opioid was still due to effect me (over 12 more hours left from the half-life of 24 hours) and I was almost beginning to fall asleep even while sitting on a chair. I drank a lot of water and tried to calm myself down. I decided to take little naps, setting the alarm clock to half an hour every time. First I kept the alarm clock next to me while sitting on a chair and watching tv, nodding in and out, alternating between being half-asleep and quite normal, but still staying awake. After a few half-hour periods of this,
I moved back to bed and did the same thing, calming myself down as much as I could, allowing myself to doze off. The alarm went off 30 minutes later, still alive, good, set the alarm for another 60 minutes. I woke up to the alarm again, still alive, and now calming down of my paranoia, and finally, I set the alarm for 2 hours and then I slapped the alarm clock shut, content I was going to be ok. I should say that at this time, I felt very wonderful while sleeping, just like sleeping on Percocet. The day was already dawning outside, which helped to ease my paranoia.
I slept this way continuously all the way from 8 am to about 6 pm the next day, waking up maybe once or twice in the process, having pleasant and vivid dreams, like I usually do when I sleep long. When I finally woke up, it was already dark outside. I had slept the whole day. I still felt great warmth and like I had slept a hundred years. I cooked myself a modest little meal and just relaxed around and tried to find out how I was. I decided that I was mostly back to normal, except just extremely relaxed and mellow.
All in all, Methadone was in no way a bad experience. Before the dose I felt that I may do another dose the following day, but after coming down I had absolutely no desire to do any more Methadone. I feel that the euphoria of Methadone was probably too short-lived to cause any real addiction potential by itself. I understand the complex physiological and psychological addiction that regular Methadone use can cause, but I myself, as a non-tolerant user felt no urge to ever use it again. It has been said that Methadone causes less euphoria and more respiratory depression than other opiates. I believe this to be true.
I felt new peaks at around 6-8 HOURS from taking the thing.
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