Citation: Erica.Smerica. "Thinking About Mother Earth: An Experience with 2C-I (exp17544)". Erowid.org. Sep 16, 2002. erowid.org/exp/17544
August 25, 2002
Although I have tripped many times with friends and family, I have never tripped alone. It isnít that I havenít wanted to trip by myself, and in fact, Iíve tripped alone in my bedroom while friends were in other rooms in the house, but Iíve never been completely alone. I havenít ever truly been completely isolated from human contact while tripping. I had no particular expectations for this trip and I was not looking for anything in particular. Things are very centered in my life these days and I am happier than I have ever been. So I suppose the only goal for this trip was simply to take a solo journey. This was a perfect opportunity for me as my boyfriend and best friend, who both live with me, were out of town. I was all alone.
Iím going to start by warning readers that I wrote most of this trip while I was tripping, although I took roughly a 2-hour break during the peak. In reporting my experience, I have chosen not to edit the original thoughts and ideas, except where necessary, because throughout most of this trip I lived only in the moment. To alter the moment now would only be trying to relive the past. Italics denote corrections or additions.
Mixed 25 mg of 2C-I in a bit of alcohol and drank it with orange juice. I feel absolutely fantastic today and am in a wonderful mood. This being my first solo trip, however, I am just a bit apprehensive about wondering too far from my house. Iím not specifically hoping to get anything in particular out of this journey, but Iím rather looking forward to a nice afternoon alone where I can clear my head of all thought and simply exist as energy. For now Iím going to take a nice hot bath to relax and maybe smoke a bit of marijuana.
Just got out of the bath, it was so nice and warm. The water felt comforting to my skin, and it was very sensual with the addition of those eucalyptus salts. Iím already beginning to feel the effects of the 2C-I. Everything seems a little more alive, my body is vibrating slightly, and my senses are highly in tune with the outside world. I donít typically smoke marijuana early in a trip, because I like to enjoy the pure elements of a substance. This time however, I didnít wait. I think I will refrain for a while now though, and Iíll go listen to some music.
2:00 [Just came in from 45 minutes outdoors, lying in the grass
Sitting outside in the sun, I began to wonder if our star was worrying whether her children would be the death of her? Could this be some lesson that we are to learn; can her children come together and respect her? If we do not, does that mean that we will be forced to evolve around not having earth? Will it take destroying all that we have before we come to understand what it takes to go forward?
Why do we spread ourselves so thin only to say that we donít have time for something important in our lives? Remember to ask yourself what is important. Remember everything.
Everything that I do to myself and to my environment has some impact. The things that I do to myself have impact on how my emotional and physical being will suffice me in old age. The things that I do to my environment will have a similar effect on our environment. It is far past time for thinking individuals to take responsibility for their actions, and for those who just donít care - evolve please. Move on with yourselves and quit soaking up the positive energy, because you are nothing but a leech on this planet.
2:22[Took a break for a balloon of nitrous oxide, 1 cartridge,
The nitrous was amazing, of course. Itís 2:22 now, but I have nothing to wish for myself right now. [a little good luck trick of saying 2:22 2-2-2 and making a wish, silly but I liken it to wearing crystals so Iíll continue.
] The plant in my living room is an interesting illustration of an evolutionary process. It began its life here as a rich and brightly colored green plant. Its fresh leaves had slight hints of yellow and white, showing itís youthful glow. After several months of insufficient lighting, it dried and turned ugly. It was all but dead, and I thought my cats would have gotten to it before it had been given the opportunity to fail on its own. [My cats eat all of my plants except for the cactus.
] I have left it hanging despite it being a bit of an eyesore, because strangely enough it seemed that dead plant was better than no plant. I looked at it very closely today with opened eyes, dilated from the 2C-I, and I see that itís growing new fresh leaves again; it has youthful colors of pink and yellow and white.
Just came back from a short walk. Two hints for the future: always take a pen and paper wherever you go, not just when youíre tripping, but always. You never know when youíll want to jot something down, and youíll never have that moment again. After that very instant, you will simply be reliving it from your memory. Have paper handy to catch those important details. Second, for the menÖdriving past a girl when she is out walking, enjoying nature, ogling her with elevator eyes is not going to capture her attention. Well, it might capture it for a moment, but not the way you were hoping for. Urgh.
My friend wonít eat meat. He is a strict vegetarian and has been for several years, although Iím not quite sure of his motives. Iíve heard him say that he wonít eat meat because it is inhumane, or because his ex-girlfriend wonít eat meat and uh, heís still following her routine, or because of something else or another. Yet, he drives a F350 truck around Boulder, a town where one only needs a vehicle out of sheer laziness. Really, I caught myself being lazy all weekend and driving my car twice. I freed up the good space for some poor soul that has to make it down to Denver each day. No, fuck them, they should be bussing. Anyway, I have to ask myself why I own a car.
When you come to understand what it is that youíve been putting all over your body for all these years, and you feel disgusted by them, and you realize them for the toxins that they are, there is no question as to whether or not youíll discontinue their use. [Here I am referring to various chemical products ranging from soaps and lotions to household cleaning products.
] The question lies in how does one properly dispose them? Seriously, no joke, what do I do with them now, any suggestionsÖ? I would begin throwing them all out this moment if I knew it would be all right, and if I didnít want to wait to see the excitement on Mís face when we throw them out together.
I just got back from a wonderful walk, and awakening walk. One of my primary focal points is going to be selling my car. Iíve already come to the realization that Iím not going to get what itís worth. But Iíve also decided that it sitting in front of my house, for days on end, only to be driven when Iím feeling lazy, is also not an option any longer. M has a car that we can use for long journeys, and there is no other reason to have a car besides that, again except for utter laziness. So my car will be sold. Iím also ridding my house of cleaning supplies that are toxic, which reap havoc each time they are washed down the drain. This is a very general and of the moment thought Ė but if you donít want to drink it or rub it against your skin Ė then you certainly shouldnít use most chemicals that are sold to clean your house.
Iím not telling anyone how to live his or her own life in so far as to live as I am living. By no means am I capable of managing anyoneís life but my own, thus I do not yet have children. I am only asking everyone who reads this report to take a step back and examine your life as you are currently living. What contributions are you making to society right now? Are our children going to suffer for the choices you are making today? What are you doing to insure that the water our children will need to drink and grow their food with, and to nurture mother earth in her old age, are not tainted by the years that youíve used your fair share? Just sit back and think about it; these are questions that we all need to ponder most thoughtfully.
Itís going to be a little tough getting started from here, but thereís no place better than to start from ground zero, where things can only get better. I didnít think I needed to trip alone. I didnít think I was looking for anything, but always when I least expect a message, I am blessed with a good one. Funny, itís exactly 4:20 now, seriously it is. Iím off to take a bike ride and perhaps catch up with a few friends.
[This was a most amazing journey, life-changing. I am still planning to sell my car, and have been researching the chemicals that we use in our house. Although we already recycle, I have also implemented other strategies to make our household be more Ďgreení.
Despite my ability to write throughout much of my trip, there were several periods of time when I could do nothing but smile. I was simply floored at times, and my mind was completely free and clear to do nothing. However, with this higher dose came spectacular visual effects and streams of thought. Thinking in my case was apparently exactly what I needed, but I found 25 mg of 2C-I to be more stimulating to the mind than lower doses that I have taken previously.
I am fortunate to have a partner who I trip well with. We can connect on so many levels, but we can also let go of each other so that we may experience periods in isolation. However I found this solo trip to be quite profound, and really understand the importance of going at it alone every now and then.
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