Citation: Newfish. "Mixed Reactions: An Experience with Nutmeg (exp15884)". Erowid.org. May 2, 2005. erowid.org/exp/15884
I was relatively new to drugs in general; although I had drank for years there was always a threat of job-related drug tests that kept me from cannibis. Once I went away for college, however, the threat was gone and after some initial reluctance, tried herb for my first time. Soon after, I ate mushrooms, and had a fun though not very visual experience. Similar experiences 2 times after that. I found the minor visuals that mushrooms gave me to not be enough, so I kept my eye out for LSD. It never came. At the end of the 2nd semester, I wanted to trip very badly (my last mushroom trip had been an incredibly happy experience). That's when my brother mentioned nutmeg to me. I was at first hesitant but after reading about it decided it was worth a try.
Anyway, enough background. My first trip was on a whim on a thursday night. Some friends and I went to the grocery store and got some whole nutmeg from a jar. I ate a bunch of it, and I think it was fairly fresh because it didn't taste too terribly to me. I washed it down with OJ which worked very well to deal with the taste, which wasn't awful but not good by any stretch. After eating, some other friends of mine (who didn't know I was nutmegging) went out to play frisbee; this was almost immediately after ingestion.
I didn't notice it all through the frisbee, but when I got back to my dorm (sometime around midnight or 1) I was talking to a friend and realized I was A) making not much sense and B) had forgotten what I was talking about. I had almost forgotten I'd eaten the 'meg, and when he asked if I was stoned I uttered an awkward, 'No' and went to my room. I did some other stuff before the upcoming journal but I don't remember it very well, except for talking to a straight edge girl who knew something was up (eyes were red as hell at this point). Anyway the following journal gives you an idea of how if affected me later that night. NOTE: other than the comments inside the , this is unabridged from how I wrote it that night.
[Ed. dropped 15-20 g of whole nutmeg out of a jar at 10-10:30 PM]
1:56 AM: Just realized that taking a journal would be a neat idea. Just took a drink of juice and imagined typing. Drymouth and redeye are severe. Lost juice cap. Hoping symptoms are not placebo-based. Time ssems to pass slower. Like in some ways to a strange brand of stoned. Rubbing eyes quite a bit now. Deciding not to leave room in order to hide my tripping from the floor. Listening to techno.
2:02 AM: Sense of touch is altered... very hard to describe, slightly pleasant. Attenion span becoming nil... getting cold so turned down the fan. Wondering if what's being written makes sense, if that last part was in the right point of view, and if this whole journal is being kept in a weird point of view. Holy fuck, i just lost track of what vi was doing. Going to do everything possible to stay awake. This took 5 minutes of concentration to write.
2:15 AM: Concentration difficulites amazing. Music sounds really cool.
2:17 AM: Short term memory virtually nonexistant.
2:20 AM: Enjoying not focusing the eyes. Wonders how much will be written. Wonder if this is how Hunter S. Thompson works.
2:25 AM: wonders about the existance of luck, and where the wonderer's luck ran as compared to the rest of the world's. Wonder about the value of money in luck calculation. Is the rest of the world really as shitty as the media would like to tell us?
2:31 AM: Realizes the last post was pure stream of conciousness. Finds humor in the situation.
2:38 AM: Holy shit. Just read a section of Horton Hears a Who. It is such democratic propaganda. Everyone's voice counting to aid of the country.
2:41 AM: whoa... just saw an isolated line of text on my screen osscilate quickly, looking like it was scrolling backwards.
3:01 AM: nodded off and had some weird ass dream. Can't remember what it was though.
3:05 AM: falling asleep is a major concern.
[Ed. sometime after this I fell asleep]
The whole experience was different, but I wouldn't call it tripping. Just weird. It was very internal and I had a few insights but not a lot. I had one dream while passed out on my desk that involved flying through a lumpy tunnel with a loud whooshing sound.
The next day (Friday) I felt really drunk/stoned, and had to go to class. At lunch, my friends (most of which didn't know) what was up commented on my eyes. Drymouth was bad too. The only trippy thing that happened was when I was sitting in class (I could barely concentrate) I heard the breathing of the guy behind me turned into a loud whooshing sound on the right side of my head similar to the dream. It was slightly pleasant.
That night, however, I had very painful constipation, which was really the only bad side effect although the day of stoned/drunk wasn't very fun (there was no real pleasure attached to the feeling).
By the time the next day (Saturday) rolled around I was good to go and actually engaged in a boxing match.
That was my first nutmeg experience. My second one was of a more sinister flavor. It was less than a month after the first one, and I was extremely bored at home (classes had just ended). So I took some of my remaining nutmeg, about 20-25 grams. I did this at school (I was taking summer classes) sitting on the quad for added personal irony and since I wasn't driving home. The nutmeg had been kept in a bag in my backpack for several weeks, and I could tell. It tasted far worse than last time, and I actually gagged, but I choked it down. I ate it at 12:30 or 1:30 Friday afternoon.
When I got home, I stayed in my room for the remainder of the day. First effects were neat: I'd lean back in my chair and felt like I was floating, though it wasn't very acute. However, by the time that dinner rolled around my eyes were red as hell and watching TV was funnier than it should have been. I was in the heavy stages of drunk/stoned and talking to my parents was not very easy. I listened to a lot of music, but I really don't remember much of the entire day.
Once again the trip was not trippy in the traditional sense: zero visuals this time. However, inside my mind was flayed open. I thought about my own behavior and it was very transparent: why I do this, from whom I picked up this idiosychracy.
The real screwy part was late that night (11-1AM) after my brother got home. He knew I was tripping and talked to me for awhile. The only part I remember was when he said something about me not telling the truth. I think it was about me falling asleep (I was very tired at that point and would pass out on my bed occasionally). I barely remember attacking him. It wasn't a big thing, and he knew I was fucked up and did not retaliate. Basically, I grabbed him by the neck and he threw me onto my bed. What it came down to is I was fucked up beyond sanity. I had lost touch with the world. I saw everything clearly, and heard stuff, but it did not stay in my head long enough for me to react properly. Eventually I passed out.
The next day I was drunk/stoned again and smoked some bud to ease me down. I took precautions (like forcing myself) and evaded the painful constipation that marred my last experience. The sinister part happened during that week. Everything looked normal, yet was not. I was plagued by irrational unhappiness and did not like anything that I saw. I could tell my thought pattern had been altered, but in an almost indescribable way, though in no ways positive. This lasted until Wednesday. On Thursday it was as if nothing happened.
So in conclusion, nutmeg was not what I was looking for, although I did have some fun on it. I think my last trip may have been bad because I was having a bad week, but I do not think I am going to risk it again. Admittedly the scars of the experience have disappeared in time, and now about a month and a half later I've actually considered doing it once more. However, the following days of insanity were too much for me and I think the rational part of my personality knows this and will keep me away from it. Perhaps in time I will try it again, but I have no plans to.
Is nutmeg for you? I do not know. I am neither advocating nor denouncing it. My experience was different from most I read. However, much of it I do not remember. If you do indulge, just keep your head about you and make sure you are in a good mood to do it. And erase any social plans you have for the next twenty-four hours or so.
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