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Loss of Magic
MDMA (Ecstasy)
Citation:   imajin. "Loss of Magic: An Experience with MDMA (Ecstasy) (exp14260)". Erowid.org. May 30, 2002. erowid.org/exp/14260

 
DOSE:
  oral MDMA
BODY WEIGHT: 90 lb
Ecstasy changed my life. I mean, I used to think if ecstasy were legal the world just might be a better place. I was given the confidence to do or say anything, to anyone. I could tell someone 'I Love You' and right at that moment I would know they loved me too.

Everyone is so willing to make your high as smooth as possible, people you dont even know. Strangers will look at you and as soon as they realize your rolling (and so are they), a special bond is formed. I never thought I would ever tire of ecstasy.

Although I never even started at taking one dose per night, it began to get ridiculous when I had to start taking five or six. I'm a little girl weighing merely 90 lbs, you'd think it'd only take 1 or 2. But with ecstasy I never want the high to end. After a while I started feeling gross the day after.

I started looking at myself like I was a tweek because I needed ex so bad the night before. Then I would start to think of all the things I did while rolling and it started to repulse me. I would remember the vibrating eyes and the crooked jaws that I once thought was so cute, but now it was confirmed to look so druggieish.

It wasnt only the fact that it took so many doses to get and stay high but it was more like the magic was gone. All the beauty of rolling left and it was replaced with truth. After a while I started seeing ecstasy for what it is, it's a drug, not some kind of cure or a warp hole to a better life.

Exp Year: 2002ExpID: 14260
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: May 30, 2002Views: 9,218
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MDMA (3) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Loss of Magic (34), Various (28)

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