Citation: LookingDistant. "Losing Myself in a Flowing Stream: An Experience with H.B. Woodrose (exp14247)". Erowid.org. Jul 18, 2005. erowid.org/exp/14247
It took some magical seeds to open my mind, and allow me to realize that Tim Leary, Huxley and Eastern religion are right. The ultimate trip is the ego death, nirvana, enlightenment, when the doors of perception or cleansed, or when you break on through to the other side. Does really matter what you call it? I just know it is real now, through experience. Here is one such experience.
I was home from college for the holidays, and had a bunch of woodrose seeds, so my bro and me could trip. He was an experienced psychedelics user as was I, but he had never tried the seeds. One morning, we shaved up 12 seeds for each of us, pounded them and put them in a tea. I proceeded to drink it down. I didnít want to vomit, so we smoked a few bowls. This didnít work, and I ended up vomiting harshly in my friendís backyard. I figured out later the nausea for me came from the taste; times since I have powdered them up and placed them in capsules.
I remember driving into the wilderness, my friend and I argued over where to trip. [Erowid Note:
Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!]
I first was determined to find a nature spot. My friend was in a reckless Hunter S. Thompson mood, he downed a bottle of cough syrup while babbling about wandering around at the local mall. I was falling into the driving, as we speeded down a lonely Jersey road. The seeds were starting to kick in, and I mentioned that we better find somewhere to pull over soon. I became omni conscious as I was able to think about the road, contemplate the concept of an ever flowing road of life which was actually flowing, and see strange hallucinations in the corner of my eye such as my friend eating his face.
We pulled up to this creek surrounded by a crumbling set of bridges, and pine trees. While sitting in the car, we listened blissfully to Dark Side in the moon, I remember staring at the cloudy sky through the window and my hand, entranced in the complexities and details of each. After a while, who knows how long, we ventured outside. Perception was greatly altered, things seemed like miles away, and time was a funny joke. Things were moving, subtle changes and flowing, colors brightening and pulsating. I recall climbing up this crumbling bridge and standing on it. It was all pulsated out in the distance and expanding like ocean waves. I was alive, and happy with that fact and understanding. But I was still stuck in the concept of self. I still was aware of my desires, my fears, my hopes, my thoughts, and I was not detached from them.
A few hours later, I was stumbling by the edge of the stream.. The flowing water overtook me. It represented all the mysteries in life, and all the answers. My mind was blown, no thoughts, and all I could do was sit down and stare. The water sort of overtook me. I was completely still, looking at the endless flowing patterns in its eternal beauty. My self faded away, my desires and my fears. All the games I was playing, what eastern mystics call the ego died. I was beyond all concepts that can be discussed, I was beyond the beyond, and time was infinite. It was the realization of one-ness. At the ultimate point we are one with everything, and the goal of consciousness is to maintain this realization through all the levels. Then I was back, in the ego, although it was at a much peaceful and lesser level. I was simply content with being, with the here and the now. My friend walked over, having seen the same thing at the same moment. I said, ďThis is it. This is what is all about.Ē My friend nodded in understanding.
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