Citation: Resonant_Dissident. "Surprising Revelations: An Experience with AMT (exp13425)". Erowid.org. Mar 24, 2002. erowid.org/exp/13425
||(powder / crystals)
The account which follows is quite lengthy, but I feel strongly (positive) about this substance. I want to make sure others have an opportunity to experience the positive affects that are possible when using AMT. However, to save the potential readers time, I do not think this stuff is for everyone. If you do not feel comfortable about critically examining your past and present behavior, AMT is probably not for you. In other words, if you have things in your past that you would prefer to avoid thinking about or that may be strongly upsetting to you, do not do it until you are ready to address those things.
I obtained a gram of AMT from a chemical supplier after reading quite a bit about it on the web. It sounded like a good 'bang for the buck', and had the added benefit of being legal (at least to obtain, if not to do). A long-time and good friend of mine, S, wanted to try it with me. My wife, R, was also present, but did not ingest on this occasion. S had never taken a hallucinogen before (with the exception of LSA once without affect), and was looking forward to it. He was however somewhat skeptical about the likelihood of it working because of the failed LSA experience. I had previously taken a variety of hallucinogens on many occasions, but had never done AMT (or MDMA, or any other substance with reported empathagenic qualities). I was therefore also very much looking forward to a new experience. The setting was my home, located on the outskirts of the city where we live. We were all very familiar and comfortable with this setting. We also would be having no visitors or other distractions during the duration of the experience, and did not have work or other attentions to worry about the following day. Also, for dosing particulars, note that S and I are both large fellows. I weigh about 215lbs and S weighs about 245lbs.
I dissolved the gram of freebase powder into 100ml of Bacardi 151. This solution therefore yields a dose of 10mg AMT per 1ml of liquid. Ergo, S and I ingested 3ml of liquor to obtain a 30mg dose of AMT. We placed the quite odorous 3ml doses of this AMT mixture into shot sized doses of orange juice. I would describe the AMT odor as very much like mothballs though somewhat more nauseating. Holding ones breath and slamming the orange juice/amt mixture seemed to be a good method for imbibing without tasting or smelling the mixture. We followed these shots with more orange juice and water to dispel the barely discernable mothball aftertaste. This was at about 6:15PM on a Friday night. We were cognizant of the mild MAOI properties of AMT and were careful not to ingest large quantities of foods high in tyramine prior to this event.
For the first 3 hours, there were some mild affects, similar to a strong ephedrine or caffeine buzz, including some jaw clenching. Chewing gum seemed to alleviate or at least hide this trisma. In addition, I started to feel somewhat dehydrated after about 60 minutes, and began drinking copious amounts of water. We would continue this practice throughout the evening, which resulted in many trips to the restroom for bladder relief. I also noticed some slight open eye visuals during the 3rd hour that I would qualify as increased color richness as well as very faint trails of color following moving objects. These are almost identical to visuals I have noticed when coming up on LSD or mushrooms. S did not notice these until later, but possibly just because he did not know what to look for. I also noticed a slightly increased pulse and mild pupil dilation. Other more subjective physical affects during this initial period included a mild frontal headache and a feeling of buoyancy or 'lightness' while walking or moving about. During this time, we were primarily sitting around with R watching movies and other programming on TV. We were mostly watching comedy (including the film 'Saving Silverman') and absolutely laughing our asses off. I noticed that I was starting to have that silly grin one often gets while coming up on a trip. R and I occasionally made notes about what S and I were reporting. I should also note that S reported mild nausea, which he defined as 'controllable, but definitely there'. I do not recall having any nausea. S would later say that he stopped noticing the nausea and it never seemed to return shortly after the 3-hour marker.
Very close to 9:15PM, I was noticing a gradual increase in intensity, so I looked over to S and said, 'Are you seeing this?' He looked about the room and waved his hand around a bit, shaking his head, and said, 'No, I don't see anything', but a moment later said, 'Oh, here it is.' I smiled and said 'welcome to the trip.' We decided at this point to take a stroll outside. Though it was February, it was warm, humid, and somewhat overcast (we live in FL). We walked around the house checking out patterns and shadows, periodically waving a hand about to observe the color trails. The outside lights were on, so there was light to see by even though it was a cloudy night without moon or star light. Upon walking almost completely around the house, we noticed the woods at the back of the property. The pine and palm trees seemed to be backlit by the overcast sky (there was pinkish illumination in the sky reflected from the city). There was very little breeze, but the trees were undulating and moving quite a lot, as if they were alternating between growing very quickly and blowing in a stiff breeze. S found this amazing, having never really seen any level of drug induced visual distortion before. I found it pleasant and similar to the visuals one experiences on a moderate LSD trip. However, an interesting difference was that you could hallucinate fairly heavily, letting yourself flow into the visuals, imagining and daydreaming, and then just look away and continue or begin a conversation, suddenly seeing nothing out of the ordinary. This could be done at will. This level of control over the experience was new to me. Typically, when seeing visuals to this extent on other substances, I have always been somewhat overwhelmed and rendered unable to communicate properly. With AMT my thoughts and speech were very clear. It was not just that cognition and memory were not adversely affected they actually seemed to be enhanced.
Upon going back inside, R wanted to know 'what we were doing out there.' We reported our visuals and physical symptoms. We were feeling 'very good body wise definitely wired.' S reported that he had earlier noticed a 'warm sensation everywhere that the orange juice had touched inside of him, extending down to and ending in his left nut.' We found this hilarious, and laughed for a long time. Finally, upon wiping away the tears of laughter, R asked me about my mental faculties, etc. I told her I felt 'less confused than usual.' She said, 'You normally feel confused?' I started to respond 'no', but then realized the true answer was that 'we're all a little confused most of the time.' She seemed to think this was a strange thing to say, but I elaborated, saying, 'it's as though a veil of confusion that I was unaware of has been lifted, and only now that it's gone do I realize it was ever there in the first place. My mind feels absolutely crystal clear.' This was a somewhat shocking realization to me and R remained skeptical. However, this facet of the experience would stay with me and be rediscovered in different ways throughout the remainder of the night.
T+4.5 - T+12.5:
At about 10:45PM, I believe we reached the peak. However, this state should be labeled as a plateau rather than a peak, because it stays at the same intensity for a long time. By this time, R was tired, and since we did not seem like we needed trip sitting, she went to bed. S and I wanted to be quiet so that she could sleep, so we headed into my home office (on the opposite side of the house from the master bedroom).
While the visuals were pronounced and interesting, it seemed like a better idea to start talking. It was very easy to converse, and we were soon openly discussing many things, including some sensitive topics that we perhaps normally would not. There was no need for the usual small talk and other nonsense that often makes up conversation we could easily talk about things that were more meaningful. I was going through some things at work involving a potential lawsuit, but more so I realized these issues at work were about my desire to leave the company and do other things. We talked about it at length and were able to get to the heart of my feelings and desires in a way that surprised me. I was able to see that one of my partners was taking advantage of me and my associates were getting far more out of our professional relationship than I was. I was also able to see the truth of my feelings and their feelings (based on memories of statements and actions), which led to a further realization that I did not agree with their approach to work and life on a number of fundamental levels. Rather than reacting to these realizations with anger or frustration, it was easy for me to see how things had happened and gotten to where they were, and for me to resolve and process these thoughts. It was also easy for me to see what I needed to do to fix my situation in the near future.
An important point that I want to stress about AMT is that it as if all of the usual 'hang-ups' that one has about a topic or a person are removed while on this substance. Minor, unnecessary emotions (e.g. imagined duty, guilt, and misplaced concern) are not present, while more important and fundamental ones (e.g. sense of truth, honor, and moral and ethical values) still are present. Because the minor or non-productive emotions are 'burned away', it is easier to see through to the truth underlying events and the motivation of the actions of others and oneself.
For the first time in my life, I could actually see that emotional responses are supposed to help us judge the truth of a situation, but that we have evolved or learned emotional behavior that instead often confuses this judgment ability. AMT seems to interfere with the emotions or processes in the brain that 'confuse the issue', which makes clear and precise thought much easier than normal. In other words, unwanted emotional baggage is no longer present. S and I were able to look at anything in our memories (including things I had not thought about in many years), whether they were painful or not. 'Painful' memories were just memories I could choose to 'feel' about them if I wished, but I also was able to resolve, categorize, and move on from these memories in a very quick and efficient manner. This ability is quite remarkable (and very desirable), and one that I never knew I was lacking until I took AMT. Consequently, S and I decided to categorize AMT as having the potential to be 'instant therapy'. However, I should point out that we are at stable places in our lives and are more or less comfortable in our current states. I can see how this unabridged and surprising access to memories might be upsetting to some thus my disclaimer at the top of this account.
We continued talking through many issues past and present, often pausing for drink-refill or restroom breaks. We also would occasionally pause to hallucinate for a while. We would look at things such as the spackled ceiling (which yielded interesting cellular life and continental drift style visions). Another fun visual journey was looking at the 'visualizations' provided with Windows Media Player. These visualizations look trippy when one is completely sober, and were sometimes astonishingly cool while on AMT we saw faces, ghosts, spaceships, and many other interesting and less describable visions while looking at these musical visualizations. The one called 'Battery-eletriarnation' was especially cool. At about 6:45AM, we decided to crash, as we were yawning quite a bit and slowly coming down.
I slept somewhat lightly, and got up at about 10:30AM when I heard some commotion. S and R were up, as S had received a call and had to go home. He said he was feeling 'mostly normal' and was fine to drive (and he only lives a minute or two away). I then stayed up until about 9:00PM, having a normal and rather relaxing domestic day about the house with R. I was somewhat tired throughout the day but not as much as I would have expected operating on only a few hours of sleep. I also felt some very mild afteraffects that I would describe as a general sense of malaise throughout the day. That night sleep was deep and restful, and I felt no lingering affects upon awakening.
Overall, I would say I feel very strongly about AMT and highly recommend it (though selectively). Through the above experience and in subsequent usage, it has led me to quite a few interesting revelations about my life, the human condition, and the nature of consciousness. I believe that it has the potential to be a very positive influence in ones life if used responsibly. However, I think that there have been times in my life when it would have been a bad idea for me to take it (because of emotional turmoil and upset). I do not believe it should be taken lightly or as a solely recreational substance, though it has been pleasant on every occasion that I have taken it. Please think about what you are doing before using it, and only do so if you are willing to take the risk and accept the mental and emotional consequences of your actions.
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