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I Finally Felt Like I Had a Brain
Methylphenidate
Citation:   patcholi. "I Finally Felt Like I Had a Brain: An Experience with Methylphenidate (exp12434)". Erowid.org. Apr 9, 2018. erowid.org/exp/12434

 
DOSE:
55 mg oral Pharms - Methylphenidate (daily)
BODY WEIGHT: 120 lb
ritalin at 45

I was a weird kid who was gifted yet failed school..born into a family of hyper-high strung maniacs.

My first experiance with amphetamines was back in '73..my senior year in high school. Druge were everywhere, especially pot. Like everyone else I smokes alot..like daily. For some reason I would have the opposite reaction..anxiety, shaking, paranoia. I kept doing it thinking I'd get happy eventually like everyone else. I know know its the typical reaction of many ADD'rs..opposite reaction to medications.

anyway..one day a friend brough in some 'whites' I guess they were his moms prescription diet pills. I took 2 before my American Govt class..within 15 minutes I felt like I FINALLY had a brain, I sat in class, took notes and for the first time in my life LISTENED. I felt very happy and focused..had a few more chances to take them..and loved how i felt...yet no craving.

ok time went on.. I got married young..stopped doing drugs and gave birth to a daughter who bounced off the walls. At 6 she was put on Ritalin 10 mgs 3's daily. One day I took one.. and I knew then that Stimulants were my missing link. For 5 years I took 2 doses twice a day to her one. She and I were both doing GREAT.

When she hit puberty the MDs then said ADHD goes away at 12..so no more Ritalin :(

man did I feel the need for speed. I made my own cocktails..2 sudefeds ground up, an added 'dexatrim' over the counter diet pill, and a strong cup of coffe..and then 4 vivarins throughout the day. This wasn't the same and I resigned to the fact that I would never again get that amazing happy normal buzz Ritalin gave me.
5 years ago at the age of 40 after research I discovered ADHD doesn't go away..DUH..so I went to a Dr and got fixed up with my Ritalin and I happily take it daily. Its much healthier than the other crap I tood..like ephedrin and caffeine.

I think it should be taken off the list as so addictive. Its not. If I wasn't on my Ritalin I wouldn't have been able to write this

Exp Year: 2001ExpID: 12434
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Apr 9, 2018Views: 3,120
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Pharms - Methylphenidate (114) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Medical Use (47), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Not Applicable (38)

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