DOSE: T+ 0:00	10 mg	insufflated	Methoxetamine	(powder / crystals)
T+ 1:00	5 mg	insufflated	Methoxetamine	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

50 kg

I did MXE for the first time yesterday, and I want to share my experience.

Some background: I’ve had many trips on many different substances, of which ketamine has always been a favorite. Back when MXE was still around, I got curious about it and ordered some. Then, my life changed and I wasn’t able to try the MXE I had, up until now. It’s the first research chemical I’ve tried. I microdose LSD regularly, but not on this particular day.

I decided ”today is the day”, did some research about MXE to freshen up my memory, and decided for 20mg to start, partly because I am very sensitive, and because I sometimes get very anxious on the come up of trips. I wanted something manageable, especially since I didn’t have a sitter. I weighed it up, and divided it up into 5mg piles as I do with K, to snort one every two minutes or so, as to maximize uptake in the nasal cavity without too much dripping back in my throat.

After some consideration I decided to eat first, because I didn’t want to be hungry during a dissociative experience, so I ate and then waited for 2 hours as to avoid nausea.

When it was time to snort, I felt nervous (”do I even know for sure what this white powder is?”), and only snorted 10mg. I watched a documentary on my computer while waiting for it to kick in.

I could feel a shift of perception after about 5 minutes, like that woozy ketamine-feeling in the head and I felt sure it was a dissociative substance. Any other change was very gradual and subtle.

At t+1h I could, rather than experience a change, perceive it in my actions; I was texting a friend and the way I expressed myself was unlike sober me. I put on some music and just listened, and then got up and danced. It was more energetic and spontaneous than usual, almost forceful. It was very much like I was watching myself happen rather than being me. I felt good, happy, open hearted, energetic.

I thought I wanted more of this euphoric state, so I considered taking the remaining 10mg, sitting in front of it, straw ready in hand. I stopped and asked myself, do I really want to? I realized, ALL my bad experiences on drugs are because I feel like I want more and then get too much. I decided this first experience will have to be on 10mg only.

I lied down in my bed and closed my eyes, thinking I’d see if I could calm down for a bit and just ”trip”. I had very subtle visuals, but the most noticable effect was that I was thinking about a lot of different things and couldn’t stay for long in a train of thought, my thoughts were racing and I couldn’t remember what I had just been thinking about. I couldn’t ”collect my thoughts”, they were all over the place, I felt quite stupid and scatter-brained. As someone who relies a lot on my thoughts and on staying in control, it was weird, and a bit frustrating to be so scattered.

I danced some more and thought, hey this is actually really good, maybe I can prolong this a bit, so I snorted one of the two remaining 5mg piles of MXE.

I decided to paint some, so I sat down and started a new painting I’ve been thinking of, and I was frantic about it. I wasn’t in contact with my body and didn’t realize I was sitting uncomfortable until my legs really started hurting and it seemed unimportant that I was hurting my legs (and this happened several times). The painting totally engulfed me, and I was watching myself, completely obsessed, manic, I couldn’t stop and I didn't care about anything else, and it was quite unsettling to experience this and not be able to stop myself. I realized this is what mania is like, and I didn’t like it. I thought I was stupid to snort that last bump but accepted the situation that this would continue for a while longer.

I finally managed to stop myself from painting, so I went back to watching documentaries and ate some fruits for a while, then I got back to painting. I was still manic about it, but it wasn’t as pushy and I felt more relaxed. When I felt I had gotten as far as I could, I went back to my computer and watched some youtube. I felt obviously soberer, but still stimulated and scatter-brained and stupid, and going to bed seemed impossible, so I went to bed quite late.

I slept well, but when I woke up I still felt a bit confused. I have had trouble with focus and getting started all day. I went outside and very clumsily tripped and almost fell over, not once but twice. It is very unlike me, I have good spatial perception and coordination usually. I also discovered a wound on my finger and I have no idea how it got there. I’m not in contact with my body and its needs. I have some kind of mental tunnel vision and can’t really think ahead. I feel stupid in an uncomfortable way. I was considering driving to the store to get some things, but I think I’ll stay put for the rest of the day considering all this.

I’m wondering now, is it different on higher doses? I’ve seen MXE described as lucid, but I felt stupid and scatter-brained. I have seen others express they felt mostly confused on it. I think, if I ever try again, I will try a higher dose, but with a sitter who can make sure I don’t do something stupid or hurt myself. I don’t feel particularly drawn to trying again though, because the mania was very uncomfortable, although I’ve gotten the impression that the trip can be quite extraordinary, which still makes me curious.

Exp Year: 2024	ExpID: 118578
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Dec 29, 2024	Views: Not Supported
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Methoxetamine (527) : Hangover / Days After (46), First Times (2), Alone (16)