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Instant Gratification, Try Instant Karma
by VonBuron
Citation:   VonBuron. "Instant Gratification, Try Instant Karma: An Experience with Cocaine (exp11760)". Erowid.org. Nov 23, 2004. erowid.org/exp/11760

3.5 g   Cocaine (powder / crystals)


New Year's is party time for a lot of people. I chose to have a small party with close friends who brought along some of their close friends, girlfriends, etc. We partied very well. On the coffee table of destruction were a half dozen pills of E, about two and a half 8-balls of yeyo, some painkillers, lots and lots of alcohol, and of course some very good ganja.

My penchant is of course for yeyo. The white powder that goes up easy and makes me come down hard. Let me lay down the preface to this short tale. I am 21 and have a very good job and am going to college as well. As you may have guessed from the above, I have my own apartment and it is/was a bin of sin. I was doing coke two or three times a month, (once a week, sometimes twice). This meaning an 8-ball at a time. Of course the high was great, the sense of power, the 'speedy-ness', the frenetic rush, oh god I want a line now. But the deal is this, coming down is evil. The most horrible come down of any drug I've sampled, dabbled, or been addicted too. Yeyo costs to much. Hurts my nose, my heart, and makes me excitable, nervous, and downright mean to people who care about me. It is a substance that can make me think crazy, it can make me think that if I don't have it I'll be lost. That's the trick though, it's the coke that makes me think I've lost my way. The fun of it gets old fast, and the addiction sets in even faster. I'll be hitting up the ATM in the wee hours of the morning just to get some. I might even steal or not pay my bills, rent to buy yeyo. I did.

I'm not an animal, but I acted like one for while. A while that seemed short, but in hindsight was much longer than I had thought. I lost my loving girlfriend, several friends, and lots of cash playing with the devil. I got burnt because I wanted to have fun, right away. I didn't want to save to buy a CD, a car, a night at the club, I wanted to take my grocery money and by more yit. I cried each time when I watched the sun rise. The light from the sun streaked in my tear drenched eyes and I felt alone, sad and depressed. I hated myself, I hated being addicted to this crap.

I turned my life around. It may have took the love of my life leaving me to see it, but I did. I saw it in time to save myself.

Exp Year: 2001ExpID: 11760
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: Not Given 
Published: Nov 23, 2004Views: 22,087
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Cocaine (13) : Various (28), Addiction & Habituation (10), Preparation / Recipes (30)

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