Citation: PBF. "Pure Pleasure In Smokable Form: An Experience with Crack (exp11598)". Erowid.org. Jul 17, 2007. erowid.org/exp/11598
I have struggled and still struggle to keep myself clean of all drugs including alcohol (I'm alcoholic and an addict) for several years. I now follow long-term therapy and have success, but I lived things with drugs that still have a heavy psychological impact on me. The drug scene can be tough sometimes, seeing some of my best friends and ones I've loved just sink all the way. Nobody ever gets used to that. I'm lucky, bloody lucky. I sustained only minor permanent damage from my drug use. Many I knew died or worse, never came back from their tripping.
Hallucinogen junkie and hardcore pot smoker, I must have done well over 150 blotter acid hits, not to mention PCP, mushrooms, E, ect. More than experienced in any case. I'm a 23 year old university grad (I managed to get a BA) and I've used since I was 16. I have detoxed once at 19 and stayed clean for nearly 2 years (time I was at the U), after which I started drinking and smoking again. The rest followed, and I tried crack last year. On a couple occasions, but this is my first trip. Trying crack was a bad, but a very bad idea.
I was with my girlfriend at the time. We had met at the hospital. Both our nervous systems were in very bad shape because of substance and alcohol abuse. We fell passionately in love despite the age gap (she is 15 years older) and were together for almost a year. It's with her I would try crack or 'rock death' as I call it.
We were at a friend's place, a very small appartment. She felt like doing 'just a little hit', and I knew what that meant. I knew the lady, and myself. So we settled for the 'little hit'. We got the coke and she started to cook in in a spoon. I didn't know how to cook at the time, but I would learn quickly trust me on that one. How its done? Put a gram of coke in a spoon, add a tiny bit of baking soda, then a bit of cold water. Then heat up SLOWLY and CAREFULLY to avoid burning the oily precipitate that forms in the spoon. A little bit of cold water should be added. The oily blotter that appear when the coke is gone is the crack and it is scooped out with a knife to dry. Then it is smoked.
So I took a puff. Boom! I almost fell on my back. Almost instantly, I had wild tinnitus in my ears, felt an amazing warmth go through my entire body and a rush in my brain. High is not enough to remotely qualify this feeling. My thinking patterns were completely altered and I had tons of energy. Felt like dancing all night. And yes sex. I had incredible sexual fantasies that felt like they didn't belong to me. And wild ones mind you. I'm a free-spirit and all, but some stuff I had never thought of before puffing crack... I felt in heaven physically and boy were my thoughts racing! Pure pleasure in smokable form.
But that feeling started to fade away after a couple of minutes and I was there, boosted like on a 2000 watt battery and thinking of only one thing: another puff. And so on. We talked, blabbed and just went nuts. We puffed all evening, all night and all morning, emptying our bank accounts. Then, at some point we had to stop due to insufficient funds! That was the hardest thing, once I touch it and like, I want more, and more and more... Within 15 minutes of stopping, I already had suicidal ideas (serious ones) and an unbearable feeling all over. Then my body started aching all over, my heartbeat was way too high and I couldn't eat or drink. I was hurting bad and my mind was going. I was going psycho, as in the psychiatric definition.
So I called the hospital because I knew I had done too much and was going to need a hell of a lot of psych meds to come back, if I ever came back. The hospital saw my state and with almost no questions, then sent me up to the mental ward pronto. I was so messed up I don't remember my first days there. Its a black hole. They got me back on my feet, but it took a good week and a half on an elephant dose of Zyprexa. Not fun. Took me a while to get my life going back to normal just because of a day of triping on crack! I still take pills to this day.
Now, most would think that after an experience like that, I would puke at the sight of crack. Well unfortunately no, that's how addictive it is! I almost off myself, but I want more. And many users are like that. I would use a couple more times with friends, but I would manage to limit myself via radical means like destroying my ATM card just before the trip to get a new one later.
To wrap all this up, all I can say is that crack is an incredibly addictive and potent form of coke that is dangerous as hell. Hope these words will be of use to someone.
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