Robotic Focus
Atomoxetine
by Artie Lewis
Citation:   Artie Lewis. "Robotic Focus: An Experience with Atomoxetine (exp114283)". Erowid.org. May 26, 2020. erowid.org/exp/114283

 
DOSE:
40 mg oral Pharms - Atomoxetine (daily)

BODY WEIGHT: 75 kg


First day of taking 40mgís Atomexetine in the morning

Initially, as the effects started to kick in, I experienced uncomfortable hot flashes, compulsive yawning and an unpleasant anxiety. This went on for the rest of the day. I felt very off, slightly nauseas, and uncomfortable with my mental state. I felt somewhat depressed and unsociable, and generally felt as if I had the flu, but with a clearer mind. Later on, when these effects started wearing down, I had a splitting headache and felt very tired.

Second day of having a 40mg morning dose of Atomexetine HCl

My mental state can only be described as off, I feel deeply awake, but with a kind of mental heaviness.
My mental state can only be described as off, I feel deeply awake, but with a kind of mental heaviness.
Almost like the feeling I get just before I headache. My focus is altered, not particularly increased. I choose to focus on things I usually wouldnít, and I get a kind of mono mania with any task that Iím currently doing. I had a strange urge earlier to take more atomexetine, but decided against it. I have a significantly altered pupillary response, my pupils go from saucer size to pinholes sporadically, and with no apparent change in light condition. Iíve never read any references to this effect. Earlier, when given a writing task, I noticed an unusually (for me) strong desire to complete it, and to do it to the best of my ability. Almost a kind of compulsion to focus on the task at hand and only on it. Iíve noticed the same in conversation, I have an almost forced feeling of wanting to intently listen to that person. I have noticed that I read things differently, focusing on the words in a way that I usually wouldnít. I can go a very long time focused intently on one thing, not looking away or fiddling or even moving. The effects feel mostly positive, but still forced. Despite the forced nature of it all, I feel a lot better than yesterday. No anxiety, and a generally improved mood. Compulsive yawning is still present for me, I yawn 4-5 times an hour, way way more than I would when not taking anything.

Third day of having 40mg atomexetine HCl in the morning:

Side effects almost completely gone, but some strange sensory disturbances are present. I hear my name called in unrelated sounds, in the squeaking of breaks, a desk being moved, anything like that. Itís somewhat disturbing, but I quickly started filtering it out. I feel very much on edge, but in a good way. The come up after taking the atomexetine was also significantly more subtle this morning. I feel really positive, my mood is good. Iím more aggressive than usual, more prone to anger and I feel like Iím closer to snapping at people than usual. Iím less impulsive, less jokey, and generally feel more serious. But my mood is still paradoxically very good, it feels as if Iíve just won a fight at every moment. Iím finding this experience to be more positive than negative, and my outlook is good.

Fourth day of taking 40mgís of atomexetine,

Much like the third, but my outlook has gotten worse. I feel less on edge, but at the same time very robotic, itís rather uncomfortable. Iíve started noticing changes in my personality, not just mental state. Iím likely going to discontinue use by the end of this week

Fifth day taking atomexetine

Iíve decided, today is my last day consuming this substance, itís just too unnerving having the way I act altered so significantly
itís just too unnerving having the way I act altered so significantly
. The parasthesia, although reduced, is still present, and very unnerving.

To conclude, this medication really isnít for me, but I can see how it would be beneficial to those who suffer from learning disorders such as ADHD, or to those who are looking to improve there focus through chemical means.

Exp Year: 2019ExpID: 114283
Gender: Male 
Age at time of experience: 17 
Published: May 26, 2020Views: 1,684
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Pharms - Atomoxetine (316) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Hangover / Days After (46), Medical Use (47), Unknown Context (20)

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