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Brain Soup
Mimosa tenuiflora (extract)
Citation:   BruisedBunny. "Brain Soup: An Experience with Mimosa tenuiflora (extract) (exp113883)". Erowid.org. Jan 20, 2020. erowid.org/exp/113883

 
DOSE:
  smoked Mimosa tenuiflora (extract)
Let me start by saying if what I experienced was anything like the average experience on DMT then yall suck ass at describing DMT.

I had a lot of expectations going in
I had a lot of expectations going in
which I know is not recommended but I couldn't help it. I’d heard about DMT through (mainly) Terence McKenna, Joe Rogan, and Adam from PsychedSubstance; After my first psychedelic experience on mushrooms I listened to all these guys talk about their experiences but I never really had the urge to try DMT, that is until recently. I’ve heard people talk about “The Calling” and I definitely had something like this, so I bought 100 Grams of Mimosa Hostilis root bark powder and Gordo Tek’d the DMT right out. As the days got closer to my eventual takeoff I started getting quite anxious, I was consuming trip reports like nobody's business hoping to find anything that might help me (and of course not knowing what I was looking for).

I decided to try out the DMT after my First Pull. I have no scale so I eyeballed a small amount and dumped it into my oil-burner pipe. I had my best friend there to watch me in case anything went wrong, put on audio of Terrence Mckenna so she might have some idea what I would be going through, and lit up. I definitely burned some of the DMT but I got some in my lungs as well. Even thought this was just a test and I didn't intend on having “an experience” I felt EXTREMELY nervous. Now I always get this feeling right before psychedelics but it always goes away as soon as I drop the substance, Not this time. Even though only got enough to make slight movement in my vision, I wasn't any less Anxious about my first real experience.

Fast forward 2 days, I’m doing my Second Pull on the MHRB and decide to scrape a bit into my pipe for another attempt at a trip. I remembered Terence Mckenna (he credits that quote to someone else but I can't remember who, Tim Leary maybe?) saying “when in doubt double the dose” so that's exactly what I did. Alone this time I put on my favourite band Crumb, dressed up in a cozy onezie, gathered up my stuffed animals; Sicily and Twigsley, and climbed under my covers. This turned out to be a series of good decisions, and listening to Crumb’s mellow tunes was far better than Terence (sorry Terence). By this time the first song on the album has ended (the album is called Jinx if you want some extra context for the story) and as soon as the second song, Nina, comes on I light my pipe and Inhale a deep hit.

I vapourized the DMT perfectly, didn’t taste or see any smoke coming from the pipe, but when I exhaled I exhaled a huge cloud, set down my pipe and Immediately thought “Oh boy you’ve done it now. I mean you’ve ACTUALLY done it. You just smoked DMT oh jeez I hope you know what you're getting into. You know smoking DMT is a LOT different to thinking about smoking DMT cause you’ve actually smoked DMT”. All this time my vision is doing the vertigo dolly zoom thing and I quickly shut my eyes, partly because I’m scared and partly because my years of training and research has kicked in and I’m still present enough to know that the things I want to see are behind my eyelids.

Here’s where I disagree with most everyone’s DMT experience. I was expecting Sci-Fi, bright colours and intricate geometric patterns. High pitched tones and a world that looks like video game graphics. Wow wow wow was that not what I got. The first thing I recall was forgetting who was me and who was the DMT. I was trying to remind myself of what I had done (smoked DMT lol) and saw the act of smoking, but from the perspective of the crystal. It was very strange, I experienced being vaporized and shot into a tunnel (not THE tunnel, the tunnel of my pipe) and down into “my” lungs, rushing through bloodstreams and through membrane barriers. It was very fun for all the little crystals, like a DMT roller coaster. I’d heard Alan Watts say “Do You do It or does It do You?” I never understood that quote until that moment.

Everything in my room was turned into a soup and I was everything and everything was me.
I was everything and everything was me.
I drifted through a stream and up some stairs, through a doorway, down a hallway. Through my guts and up to my brain. It was orange and purple and very vibrant though not the Neon Sci-Fi colours I had come to expect. This whole time I was desperately trying to organize everything back into their solid physical categories, and was barreling through this trippy orange soup trying to figure out which was me and which was DMT. The absolute best metaphor for what this was like is in Scooby Doo: when the gang is chasing the villain and they keep popping in and out of doors that couldn't possibly be linked. Combine that with an Mc Escher painting and you’ve got a pretty good idea of how my experience was going. I was chasing myself through doors of perception and pulling off the mask only to reveal that it was’nt me I was chasing, its was the DMT or Sicily or my blanket or anything really. Once I finally caught up to myself it was like a moment of clarity. Still tripping I opened my eyes, which was a mistake. My bedroom didn't just feel like soup, it looked like it too. I couldn't tell where the border between objects were (or I just flat out didn't understand that there were borders) this was very overwhelming and I was happy to shut my eyes and sink back into delirium. I remember talking to my stuffed animals saying “Oh Sicily.. I don’t think we’re gonna do this again..” I was petting Twigsley’s arm while simultaneously BEING Twigsley’s arm and feeling “my” fingers in my fur.

There is a point before I opened my eyes when the music stuck in place, almost exactly like the sound a computer makes when its frozen, like a digital grinding noise. I... It's hard to remember what happened during these couple of seconds during and after that noise. I don't think I broke through but I wont say it’s impossible, I have heard of people breaking through and immediately forgetting, only to remember what they buried years later so idk. There was also a point when I could VIVIDLY taste something in my mouth, I can't really pin down the flavour but it was hot like coffee and it really just nailed down the Soupiness of this trip.

Finally things start to make sense again, I open my eyes and can just about make out words and individual objects. I have a personal rule against trying to end a trip early, but I couldn't help it, I shot out of bed the second I felt I could in an attempt to feel normal again. I just stood there like a deer in the headlights, looking around for anything to tie me to reality, as things settled down I slowly realised I was back and things were solidly themselves again.

All in all I don’t know if I'll try DMT again
All in all I don’t know if I'll try DMT again
, at the time I definitely didn't want to but If you’ve ever had a difficult experience on psychedelics then I'm sure you’re familiar with the “I’m never going to trip again” line that comes out. Then after a few weeks or months it doesn't feel like such a big deal anymore. Maybe whatever was “calling” me got the message through while I was out? Maybe the soup was the message? Maybe I’m just a pussy who doesn't want to dissolve again lol. Whatever the case, that DMT is going to sit on my shelf for a long time.

Exp Year: 2019ExpID: 113883
Gender: Not Specified 
Age at time of experience: 22
Published: Jan 20, 2020Views: 1,301
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DMT (18), Mimosa tenuiflora (74) : General (1), First Times (2), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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