Citation: Reality Pirate. "The Night I Accidently Did Four Tabs: An Experience with LSD (exp112805)". Erowid.org. Feb 13, 2019. erowid.org/exp/112805
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The Night I Accidently did 4 tabs
The experience was amazing, scary, exciting and definitely life changing. I spoke about my LSD experience with a couple of good mates. Excited to tell them what happened that night I soon learnt I need to choose who I tell carefully. I feel it shocked and scared them and I think it affected our relationship negatively from then on. They struggled to comprehend or understand what I was telling them. I think it shook some core ideals and life beliefs. They are good mates who know who I am as a person and know what I told them actually happened to me and I think this is why it scared them so much.
It has been nearly 4yrs since it occurred, I still remember it well but the emotional connection has lessened over time. For a long time just remembering it and talking about it brought back all the emotions I felt during the trip
For a long time just remembering it and talking about it brought back all the emotions I felt during the trip
like I was there all over again. I think that is also why it scared my friends they could see and feel my emotional connection as I told them. They saw how real it was for me. I can still see their faces stunned lost for words and struggling to process what I was telling them, unsure how to feel about it and not sure what to say afterwards. Eyes wide open lost and confused.
I think I am a rational thinking person quite level headed in most situations, I also consider myself quite mentally resilient a positive thinker with some self-belief. I have an open mind to lots of different concepts and ideas of what life and reality is both scientific and religiously. I think the mind has more power than we know and psychedelics could be a key. I did not know a lot about LSD just that it connected and expanded your mind and perception of reality. I also thought it to be possible to control the trip to some extent. Do and be whatever I want. Maybe even think about things and find an answer or understand what I couldnít before. A short cut to a controlled meditation journey of personal discovery where there are no boundaries and endless possibilities. This is something I was keen to try and do if I got the chance.
Well I got the chance all rightÖÖ... down the rabbit whole I would go thinking I was a real super hero only to find out I was like a child in a costume playing super heroes. Unaware of what I was doing, where it was I was playing my game and that the big kids would soon teach me where I was.
LSD isnít something I came across very often and was usually not in very high doses. So, I would take the opportunity when it came along. I had tried LSD a few times before the night that I am about to talk to you about. First trip I ever did was mild couple of little visuals nothing exciting it did open my way of thinking a little as well nothing exciting. Others I took had also been like this, some a little stronger. TABS - 20 mics- threshold. Some slight euphoria and body high.
However, the next time I did LSD was with a good mate one Christmas eve and my first real trip. Had lots of visuals that made my surroundings change colours, melting and morphing of surroundings as well as lots and lots of laughing and more laughing. Also, some strange but good experiences that occurred. Like feeling stuck in the mirror trying to work out which side I was meant to be on. My friend finally found me and yanked me out when I told him what was happening. I marked the kitchen tiles with a cross using a texter because they were shuffle boarding around so I was trying to track them. And lots more things during the 5hr trip. Was left feeling exhausted but very excited and exhilarated by the whole experience at the end it was all good fun. SUGAR CUBE - 110 mics- A hit of some really good LSD. Visuals are getting a lot more obvious now. "Ripples" over laying my field of vision. Patterns from all different cultures seen on walls, surfaces, faces etc. Closed eye hallucinations become more apparent.
The night I did 4 tabs of LSD
The night was like most nights at home with my wife and 2 young kids. The phone rang it was one of my best mates I have known since high school, call him ďJĒ. Hey bro got some wicked acid if your interested man. 2 Tabs and you will be flying bro and hugging the unicorns. I thought yeah ok why not its only 8- 830 on the weekend. Would love to trip like I did xmas eve again.
A little excited I headed around to mates place he was at. I knew the 2 guys who lived there and got along with them well. When I got there the house had about 3 people I didnít know at all and they were all tripping pretty hard! Have been for a couple of hours. J was also tripping but still holding a coherent conversation with me. Everyone in the house was pretty high after dropping 2 tabs. J gave me a bag and told me to tear away 2 tabs. I looked at the sheet saw the perforated lines running down. J said 2 are yours 1 is mine. I saw 2 perforated lines 3 tabs. Knowing I shouldnít touch them with my fingers I tore them apart in the bag. Pulling down one of the lines leaving my 2 joined and his separated. I pulled my 2 out and put them under my tongue and gave J back the bag. He walked off while I sat on the couch letting the tabs dissolve under my tongue. I was watching the others in the house. One mate is walking around the house stopping leaning on his front foot lifting his back leg pointing at people randomly while dropping the words ďNaaahhrrrnn Bread.Ē Another guy is sitting at the end of the couch in his own world I didnít know him. Had one mate next to me talking random stuff to me about his day telling me to get ready to trip hard he was just starting to come down after having 2.
It had been about 5 mins tabs were mush and I had just swallowed them and waiting for them to start. J comes back into the lounge room straight up to me and says urgently, bro how many did you have holding out the bag I said 2 as I pointed to his saying thatís yours there. He stood up looked at me and said man there is 2 there. Wholly shit man you have just taken 4 Tabs. I said no there is the line I tore down your tripping man I had 2. To which J replied man there is a line running the other way in the middle look. As I looked closely I could just see the other perforated line running across the middle of the rectangle making 2 squares. Wholly shit bro you just had 4 of these tabs wholly fuck man!!!! Get ready you are in for a big night. By this time the others heard what we were talking about and responded just like J did. Still tripping but on the way down knowing how hard they had just tripped on 2 were all in disbelief I had just taken 4 and said to me your fucked holly shitÖ.. Wow get ready manÖÖ... holly shit gets ready. I thought to myself not many people I knew had tripped like I did xmas eve. And normally tabs are not as good as people say they are so I thought and then replied itís all good I will be fine I have tripped hard before. To which they all replied Nah man get ready. I shrugged and said oh well to late now. So, I sat back and waited.
J came and sat next to me and asked how I was doing. Good I am starting to feel it now the room is feeling different. By this time my other mate was back to randomly dropping the words Naahhrrnn Bread again and everyone went back to doing their own thing again. I was starting to see things differently and starting to comment on things and began being a little bit obnoxious, starting to get louder. I felt like I wasnít part of the group and they were annoyed with me being here especially the guys I didnít really know. They were on the way down and I was heading up. I looked over to the guy sitting on the edge of couch. He had long ginger hair and a bushy ginger beard. All I saw was Dr Zaius from planet of the apes. He morphed into Dr Zaius right in front of me. I nudge J next to me and said man I think its kicking in bro. Hey Is that Dr Zaius on the couch bro. J laughed as I sang the song Dr Zaius, Dr Zaius. I was now seeing things in the room begin to change and morph. I started asking J about things I was seeing as if to confirm I was tripping. Things started moving and changing colours. J asked how I was going? looking concerned I could tell he was keeping an eye on me. I told him I was ok and I was starting to trip. The others wanted to turn off the lights turn up the LSD trip music with the TV playing geometric shapes and colours. I was just starting to see stuff in the room melt and change and wanted to keep the light on so I could see it more and interact with them. But they were ready to relax and watch the colours as they came down. The lights soon turned off music a little louder.
I sat back into the couch and took a moment to assess myself and the effects. I was well and truly starting to feel it. I thought I need to settle in I felt it was building so I repositioned myself and really got myself settled in a comfortable sitting position on the couch. The bright colours moving and changing on the walls from the tv playing a LSD trans music video really kicked in the visuals. Colours got bright and vivid moving and forming shapes. I soon closed my eyes to not watch the lights. I felt I had a dry mouth and needed a drink, I opened eyes and asked for one the room rushed past as my eyes closed again. I had a drink I think?????? I soon got a rotten taste in my mouth it tasted disgusting. Opening my eyes, I was not able to see the room or my body in front of me. No matter how much I moved my head around trying to see the couch or J next to me nothing. My body feels the couch Iím sitting on and the lounge room itís in. I can feel the space of the room but not view it or hear it. I wondered if I had just drunk from ashtray or can with cigarette butts in it????? Confused??? Thoughts of my body interacting in the lounge room from a third person view I saw me chewing horrible things from around the room. I then thought I need some chewing gum I started chewing it was like I was chewing on something rotten. I started thinking if the others were messing with me or if I was eating things not edible and being that weird guy in the room. My mouth felt very real texture while chewing with a very strong bad taste. This passed by quickly. I now saw a room again it was dark, music was loud Iím in a nightclub lounge with neon lighting effect. I could feel something had changed? I noticed it was that it not only looked different it no longer felt like mateís lounge room. This all happened within 20min it pretty much went from reality to some slight visuals to reality gone.
I was gathering myself and accepting the new room I was now in. I could hear the others making comments like, I need to settle down, Yeah, he is messing this place up hope he figures it out soon. It took me back for a moment. As I started to look around where I was the room became more focused. I was there now I could see 3 people from in the house. Ok you are here with us now settle down and enjoy being here one voice said in a relieved way. It came from my right. It was the guy at the end of the couch. I felt it was still the same people in the house but they were different now they felt more real and I could feel their emotion projected onto me. I felt to be meeting the higher consciousness state of them also I could feel their emotional state of annoyance but then acceptance and happy. If you can project your emotion to someone they soon understand and stop. When you interact based on emotion you can feel the intent behind the interaction meaning you donít wonder if a comment or action was done in a nice or bad way because you can feel their emotion when they do. Even though they were saying negative type comments I didnít feel judgment from them it was from kindness
Even though they were saying negative type comments I didnít feel judgment from them it was from kindness
. I was not hung up on social norms or insecurities, the fake show we all put on is gone this is why I felt it was the real them. Even though music was on I realized how clearly, I could hear them over the music while on the other side of the room. This place was nice but they wanted to just sit in this space and be left alone. Conscious interaction with other people and the clarity of the room and sound was perfect and I was able to isolate and pick up a noise across the room like headphones. They kept going about with what they were doing before I got there. I didnít really interact with them at all they were not interested.
I looked at the room giving it more attention. It had no doors it felt like a small retro night club lounge lite up in neon club lights. It felt like it was its own place with nothing outside the room but an empty void. I remember thinking wow this is amazing. Am I really in this place I ask myself? I feel like I have arrived somewhere. I now understand I have left my reality and I feel different? Strong not physical body strong, my being. I had projection of a me but it didnít feel any weight on it or interaction from room like a breeze or temperature. I realize where I am and have grasped what is happening and it was incredible.
OK now itís time to play I thought what can I do in this place. Feeling this energy about myself I thought how strong I might be and what I can do. I stood up and sort of prepared myself to muscle flex I guess is best way to describe it. Exert my energy of self-outwards. I built up and released. A huge energy shockwave pulsed out of me and the room bulged out around me as I flexed and then came back in as I relaxed. Holly shit I couldnít believe that just happened. It was like realizing I have super powers. Still in awe of what I had just done so excited. I started to realized how much power I might have. I barely exerted myself. This place felt like I had found the real me and my reality is a show shutting all this off. I thought wow is this what we truly are. I felt excited and really happy still grasping with what was happening and accepting it yet not afraid in any way.
I felt excited and really happy still grasping with what was happening and accepting it yet not afraid in any way.
I was now feeling strong and centred as I stood there embracing the moment and this feeling. I heard this voice, He thinks he is powerful have a look at him. This was followed by sniggering and laughs. I look across the room and see these dark figures standing around a table in a dark corner looking over at me talking about me being intimidating. I now notice I am in a completely new room. I was standing at a bar by myself no one else was there except me and the entities in the corner. This room was like a VIP room or a nightclub owners room. For a couple of minutes, they messed with me being a little friendly then insult me. I was starting to feel intimidated and not sure what to do. Then I said to myself no I wonít be intimidated, I wouldnít let that happen in my reality so I ignored them.
I stood up proud and faced them. This didnít go down well. The figure that seemed the ring leader of the group crossed the room towards me in a sort of shadowing motion appearing then disappearing crossing the room in 4 motions finally appearing in front of me. He was an evil looking person. He had slicked back black receding hair, a sharp pointy face and nose with 2 little thin moustaches. He was thin and hunched over a little wearing a silk smokerís jacket. He said to me, you think you are strong and in control. Yeah, I replied. Youíre not in control. He had this ability to be nasty but then he would be nice and I would see him as nice. I did not care about the threats or intimidation from him like it didnít happen. Come with me he said I will show you something. I started following him. Then all of a sudden, I was seeing myself from an outside view but was feeling and experiencing as the me I was watching. Understand what I am saying? You ready this is when people freak out!!! I feel so happy enjoying what I was doing. I started to come back like I had been removed and no memory after following him to now. I become aware and back in my body I see what I am doing I was naked slicing through a body's abdomen with a butcherís knife covered in blood. I look around to see butchered bodies and blood everywhere standing amongst them the evil man also naked covered in blood laughing hysterically. I started trying to process what has happened in disbelief I had done this and I felt the enjoyment I had. Then it hit me the realisation at the possibility that I may have just tripped out and killed everyone in the house. Hoping I had not done this a news story plays out in my head. A man on acid has killed and butchered 6 people. Found covered in blood wandering the streets. No way, I said. It didnít happen they are ok. I was instantly back in the retro night club lounge. The other oblivious still doing them.
All I wanted to do was get back into that room with them. It took a little while to calm down and get back to that room. Finally, I was standing at the bar again, I hear them all laughing at me. Telling me Iím a puppet and they are in control. Again, the evil guy appears in front of me being all nice again and eventually says come over here. I told him Iím not going anywhere with you and he will never do that to me again. He vanished back to the table at the back of the group.
They all start telling me its ok we are just playing with you its ok come on your ok. Another figure crosses the room becoming a rich gangster wearing gold jewellery, purple pimp suit and a fur coat and hat to match. He talks to me and before I know it, I am driving in a Ferrari going to parties living large. Feels like a couple of months had gone by of me living this way. I finally stop and say I donít want this, this is not whatís important to me not while I'm in the place. Bang back in the retro lounge room. It doesnít take me very long to get back to that room this time. Again, they snigger and are being all smug. See we are the ones in control. I had a thought maybe people like Brittney Spears other celebrities and people that started behaving strangely it was these things taking full control of them. I couldnít believe how they were able to manipulate me to forget, to hypnotise me so easily. From making me feel shit and attackers towards me to them being friends and me going with them.
I stood at that bar tall and facing them not backing down to them. Then a sexy Burlesque looking woman is next to me all over me I realize itís another of the figures from across the room. Somehow, she gets me to leave with her. I donít know why or how they were able to trick me into going each time but they did. Was like being spellbound by them. Iím now surrounded by gorgeous women having every sexual fantasy and desire I have performed to and for me. She knows without me asking, it would just happen. Again, I become aware and choose this to stop. I love my wife and we have crazy awesome sex, this has no value I have her and love her more than I want this. I donít want this. Back into the retro lounge I went. Now I am able to go straight to the VIP room.
This time however I tell them I donít want anything from them you have nothing I want and I do not want to go somewhere with any of you. They were agitated and unsure what to do trying to approach me but I say no go away. Finally, I said you are not allowed to control me ever again. Another entity starts towards me NO, I said go away I donít want it. What happens next was something I will never forget. The feeling was like nothing I had ever felt before it was so overwhelming.
Two huge pure white energy beings entered the room they stood 2 stories high and had a Hulk-like build. They had no features just white energy in the shape of a Hulk. I look over to the table and see them all huddled in the corner in fear. No longer the tough bullies they acted like before, now scared and in disbelief. I herd some comments from them. How did this happen he brought them together? These 2 have been kept apart for eons. How can he have done this? They have both been waiting for this moment the opportunity to come along to find one another like something big between them happened or they would get something is what I felt. The POWER I felt from these 2 was intense just so much POWER!!! I canít describe it for you to understand. It made me feel so small and weak like I have no choice or ability to stop anything they wanted to do. It hits me from the inside and pushes out and it is intense and constant. They were taunting each other pacing the room like fighters sizing each other up taunting and building up to battle. I remember how excited they seemed to get this opportunity to finally get one another. So small I was and being constantly kept in the middle of them as they circle around back and forth. I couldnít help feeling like they were fighting over me in some way. Like Good and Bad, but I could not say one felt like the bad one. Was just what I thought might be happening. I said no way Iím not strong enough for this, their POWER was too much and it never eased off me. I was standing in between them the whole time. Imagine standing between two Hulks ready to fight. It was too much I said I am not doing this nope this is too big for me. I shut myself down and thought get me out of here.
I then found myself in this endless loop of no space forming for any longer than 2-3 seconds no train of thought would hold construction. Then I realised a loop had started again. I was 2 dimensional and would slide across a space. I was standing on my front foot back leg bent and foot in the air pointing my finger. And I would hear Naaarrnnn BrreeaadÖ and back to chaotic visuals like thought was not able to construct a formation. Was like all alternate realities flipping past like channels trying to tune in but unable to hold it.
What is amazing to me is that the whole time my inner voice or thought was always still me
What is amazing to me is that the whole time my inner voice or thought was always still me
like Iím sitting here now and any other day. Even though I have no body or container my thought is always present and very sober and me. While in this loop I started to think I might have broken my psyche am I going to be institutionalised stuck in this state because this had been continuing for what felt like a very long time. Am I in the foetal position rocking like a crazy person. Is this going to end? I started thinking about my kids and how I need to be there for them and I canít let them grow up without me and how I am going to miss seeing them grow up. I have to find my way back from this for them I canít let this happen. Then I thought about my wife and her not having me there to help with the kids. I thought about how much I would miss her and how much I will hurt her being psychologically broken or dead. Then I just managed to pull in and hold onto an emotional connection I felt for my wife. I remembered how much I loved her and the love I felt. As soon as I felt that love take hold of me in the distance a green light shot up from the ground into the now violet sky above me on some plane of existence it had stopped on. It exploded high in the air and spread around the entire planet slowly a veil fell down to the surface. At the moment it exploded the feeling of love was powerful and totally immersed me. Total love and happiness washed over me. It felt euphoric with a strong safe protection from everything. I wanted it to stay forever I couldnít hold it though. As it fell down to the ground it weakened until it went away.
After that everything slowed down things started to construct again still spaces changing like new construction of reality passing by me. I associate it to trying to tune back into my reality of earth. I did find the lounge room again music off lights on and quiet, but could hold it this happened probably three times. Each time I struggled to accept I was back to my reality and it was real. It didnít feel or look right. I finally got back and stayed there, I questioned it was real again it no longer felt real it was just like all the other places I had gone past. But I felt the familiarity of it then I sat forward and realised I was back I found it yep I was back. I saw J which confirmed it and then the others.
J was there next to me. Fuck man how you going? Holy Shit. Fuck me. What the Faaark. Shaking my head putting my head into my hands running them over my head as I threw myself back into the seat Fuck Fuck Fuck I stood up quickly and said I need to get out of here and went straight outside. J followed me out to the brick letter box. I leaned on it and just kept saying Fuck, fuck, faarrk wholly fuck man. J stood on the other side and leaned down. I looked at him I could see he was worried. I just shook my head saying holy fuck bro I went to this place I met some beings I left this place and I didnít know if I would find my way back, I was in this loop for so long. I proceeded to walk around in disbelief and processing it all. I was still able to feel their power when I thought about them it would nearly overwhelm me to the edge of control.
I called my wife to come and get me I told her what happened she was amazing I mean concerned about me as I walked around the house in disbelief rambling and talking while processing what had happened and that it did actually happen. It was as real as sitting here right now except I know I was sitting on mateís couch for like 3hrs while this happened. It's still a memory for me no different to any other life experience memory. I began having these ideas of connection and the flow of everything around me its all a dance of interactions. And if you donít resolve an issue or let go it wonít go away it is just on a loop always coming back around to conscious thought. The more unresolved issues the more loops the messier the flow of your song for your cosmic dance. Like hitting the wrong note in a song causes a misstep to the dancer. Handle your issues or let go of them.
4 hits ~~ Impossible, astonishing things happened. ~ Extremely vivid time lapses. [experiencing past, present, and future events happening all at once] - Body movements were extremely confusing / disorienting. Trails were so intense. I could see what I was/am doing in my past / present / future; the transition between each moment blended together. I could no longer really see my own hand in front of my face. My intellect and observations become one. ~ I lost my ego, depending on my karma. Total loss of visual connection with reality. The senses ceased to function in the normal way. The loss of reality became so severe that it defied logic. Extremely profound loop / thought lessons. Harsh teachers arose [metaphorically speaking...or not].
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