DOSE: T+ 0:00	15 seeds	oral	H.B. Woodrose	(ground / crushed)
T+ 3:15		smoked	Cannabis

BODY WEIGHT:

80 kg

Woodrose July 2018

Preparation: Ground 15 seeds into fine powder with mortar and pestle. Soaked in 40 proof vodka for 12 hours to kill toxins. Spilled result onto a paper napkin to let vodka drain out then wrapped remains in the napkin and swallowed with water on stomach empty for 8 hours. Ate seeds at 1:00. Two hours passed with no result.

3:00 Light nausea. Unpleasant feeling. Ache in balls.
3:15 First yawns. Always a sign things are about to happen. Very tired. Took small toke of grass.
3:30 Very tired. Drank some good orange juice in hopes of getting some energy back. Don’t feel insightful, or creative.
4:00 I start to understand, and then I don’t.

Insight: Stop trying. There is nothing there to understand. (That’s the trick.) Reading some Buddhist scripture is has been very difficult for me to understand. Now makes sense.

4:12 Lay down. Walking not easy.
5:35 Get up to do some meditation. I keep getting sucked back into thinking.

Recording some insights on tape recorder: On trying not to think. We are stuck in flypaper of thought. The harder we try to get out, the more stuck we are in it. I keep thinking I don’t know anything, but there is nothing to know. Truth itself is an illusion. I’m asking, What is there to do? The answer comes to mind. Just wake up. You don’t have to do anything. It will come to you. What will come? I can’t imagine. Watching the USA slide into a swamp of words meant to confuse, diffuse, disarm. How can we not think? It sees an unfair thing to ask. The act of asking in itself is an illusion. Love and hate – the two do not exist without description. Before that the two do not exist. There is something else, beyond thought. But there is no escaping although I think a few have done it.

I always get into, “What should I do?” and the answer is always, “Relax. You don’t have to do anything it will come. Just relax. Reality seems an illusion. A constant stream of events keep us distracted, occupied. No room to really think, or see.

Physical description: Time is very messed up. Seems to go both forward and backward. Sometimes seem to stop. A feeling of being in contact with someone, something. A very spiritual experience. Answers come to questions.

6:00 Still seem to be in contact with something spiritual. Reading dreams I have recorded. Meanings seem easy, obvious.

Thoughts on illness: Body reacts to stress. Can be cured by relaxing. A lot of stuff about relaxing – stress and TV news, the job. Let go of it. So hard to see. Hard to believe.

7:00 Some creative thoughts. Writing a poem.
8:00 Starting to come down a little. Balance still off. Being very careful as I begin to move around. All this time has been at my desk, in bed or sitting on meditation cushions.

9:00 Ate some chicken and drank more orange juice. Felt good on empty stomach.
Watched some TV and was able to fall asleep around midnight.
Felt good the following day.

Exp Year: 2018	ExpID: 112566
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 80
Published: May 27, 2020	Views: 466
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H.B. Woodrose (26) : Entities / Beings (37), General (1), Alone (16)