Citation: Alaska. "Beneficial, Sense of Repaired Self-Esteem: An Experience with 1P-LSD (exp111444)". Erowid.org. Jan 25, 2018. erowid.org/exp/111444
||(blotter / tab)
A Beneficial Experience
In these past couple of days I've been experimenting with tabs of what is known as '1P-LSD'. An RC whose current legality in much of Europe has resulted in the manufacturing of lab-quality sheets of the drug and said sheets making their way to the States via online vendors. This RC is known to be a 'prodrug' of LSD, meaning once administered it is metabolized into good ol' LSD in the body. After some research into the drug via the online psychedelic community, I picked up on the general consensus that the effects of the drug are virtually indistinguishable from that of regular LSD (only discrepancies appearing to be things like absorption/duration/excretion).
A friend had been offering to sell me the drug for a while and after some research I decided I would buy and consume a 100μg tab of this 1P-LSD. Now my only experience with psychedelics prior to this would be two mushroom trips (one bad one good) and a pretty intense yet actually pleasant experience on what I'm pretty convinced was a tab of 25c-NBOME. So I had been a little familiar with what I could possibly expect from psychedelic drugs and was hoping I could finally experience what its like to take real LSD.
-5pm Friday night - I visit my friend in his apartment building and receive the tab of 1P-LSD and place it on my tongue using scissors, making sure not to touch it with my hands.
-5:25pm - I'm sitting in my friends apartment and were watching 'The Hobbit'. I start to get that sensation when psychedelics are kicking in that something is different. I couldnt quite tell what but something was definitely happening.
-5:30pm - The very 'Alice in Wonderland' effect of my head seemingly taking up the whole room and then me feeling incredibly tiny starts becoming apparent.
-5:35pm - Colors are becoming incredibly vibrant in an amazing way. Everything becomes more detailed and in a seemingly totally natural way as if things had always been this beautiful and I had just never noticed. I notice I'm incredibly comfortable and my hood is 10x more softer than I had ever remembered it being. I feel an incredibly happy/giddy feeling rising up in me and I cant keep the smile from my face.
At this point its worth mentioning that I have been struggling with anxiety for years and always found difficulty in just relaxing and being part of a good time. A sense of impending doom has plagued me from time to time thats interfered with my ability to enjoy my life and even think rationally sometimes. This black cloud I had come to know was at the back of my mind the whole time I was waiting to feel the tab and I feared it would suck me into a loop of bad thoughts and engender a terrible trip. But at this point and time I felt the weight of paranoia and anxiety lift from my shoulders and allow me to take a deep breath and sit comfortably free of worry in a way I had not been able to do in many a year.
I felt the weight of paranoia and anxiety lift from my shoulders and allow me to take a deep breath and sit comfortably free of worry in a way I had not been able to do in many a year.
I was able to think in such clear and measured thought that dismissing my anxious thoughts became easy and I started embracing the atmosphere and the energy I had begun to feel was shared between me and my friends that night. I realized all my troubles (financial/emotional/family etc.) were all fixable and the ability to feel and share love with all those close to me should be revered above all and that I was neglecting to do so. I realized I could be one of the happy people and I felt my self-esteem and the love for those around me begin to swell.
-5:45pm - Fits of euphoric and hysteric laughter are easily enticed. Me and my friend laugh at how small his shower looked to us for what felt like an hour until our face and stomach muscles were sore. Visuals are more and more pronounced as all surfaces seem to be bubbling/waving and all have a colorful sheen/pattern as well. Looking out my friends window which points out looking down a very long street in our city, the loss of depth-perception is astounding. It looks as if the closest rooftop and the farthest sign are the same distance away and could be touched from where I was. Even with cars driving and people walking around it all reminds me of a little toy city like in Mr. Rogers.
6pm to 7pm - It's 10 degrees outside but me and my friend decided it would be very fun to go for a walk. So we suit up and take to the streets and the transition into such a different environment is mind-blowing. My clothes feel incredibly soft still and though I'm walking around some shit city at night in 10 degree weather I felt as if I was warm in bed and was being carried around by some force. I feel incredibly social and am talking to random people I meet. Colors are still incredibly bright and tracers are left behind by most moving objects. I buy some candy and the flavors are to my tongue are what the colors had been to my eyes, and the sensation begins to spread from my tongue and throughout the rest of my body. The ability to 'feel' the flavors I was tasting was apparent and it induced yet another fit of hysteric laughter. My trip is steadily climbing in intensity I just feel incredible over all. It's around this time I check my phone and realise it's only been 2 hours since I took the acid. To me it had felt like at least 4 hours had past and I was astounded by the time dilation.
10pm - After a few more hours (felt like eternity to me) of experiencing the effects listed thus far me and my friends decide to go to the nearest Dave and Busters (arcade/restaurant). I feel what seems to be my peak start to come on, just about all things stay the same but they climb in intensity and I feel like I'm melting into my friends car seat. Driving down the highway all lights and shapes seem to blur into a cacophony of motion and energy and I'm laughing hysterically for most of the ride.
10pm to 12am - Arriving at the Dave and Busters the overload of flashing lights, noises, and unfamiliar faces is a little awkward to deal with at first but I adapt and am in child-like adoration of the visuals before soon. We get a table by the bar and I decide that I want a beer. It then took me the next ten minutes of more hysterical laughter to formulate the plan of how I was going to acquire said beer. I finally organize in my mind: '1. ID 2. Money 3. Beer. Got it.' After executing my plan nearly flawlessly I get my beer back to our table and consume it. Two more times and I still feel no real buzz through the acid so I stop buying beers and we go play some games. We arrive at the guitar hero kiosk thing and I pick the hardest difficulty after years of not playing and do way, way better than I expected. It felt as if the 1P-LSD had actually given a little edge despite barely figuring out how to order a beer earlier. After a couple of hours of this we decide to head home at around 12.
On the drive back I can feel myself coming down and feeling a bit tired but very comfortable. Visuals are losing intensity and so is the head trip. I start pondering how much fun I'd been having all night and how lucky I was to have such amazing friends. Not only had this drug aided me in sharing love and connecting with those around me it actually alleviated the social anxiety I had suffered from the to the point of being able to much more fluidly coordinate my speech and mannerisms in conversation. I felt like a new person and even though the high was wearing off this newfound chasm of my personality had remained and felt very at peace with where I was in life.
1am - I've arrived home and the trip has almost completely subsided. Other than a slight shift in colors and patterns I'm not feeling much of anything. I stay on the computer and cant seem to fall asleep until early in the morning.
Now its been a few days and this sense of repaired self-esteem and adoration of the opportunity to be alive still resides in me. I have found my social anxiety (at least temporarily) to be completely alleviated and still think with much improved clarity about who I want to be and what I want to do. It hasnt given me all the answers but it has engendered a drastic improvement in my mental/emotional well-being, I bought a few more tabs from my friend and am storing them properly to be used again in the future. These last few days have been a time of incredibly constructive and optimistic introspective thought that I foresee will lay a heavy hand on the course of my future for the better.
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