Citation: Shunyata. "A New Hope: An Experience with DOC, Clonazolam & DMT (exp108077)". Erowid.org. Nov 3, 2016. erowid.org/exp/108077
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Me: Have used more psychedelics than I can remember. I have been smoking weed every 1-2 hours for the last 15 years. I've burned out a lot of my receptors in my brain due to very large doses of so many different things. I consider myself to have a real problem with drugs. They have destroyed my life and I can't seem to be able to let them go. I am a very smart person with an unbreakable intention to help others every chance I get. I know I could have done things to change the world. To make things better for everyone. But because of my string attachment to pleasure I have lost that chance, at least in this life.
I don't know how much of this to report because it was a very long day. Most of it was not more than a drugged state for having fun but I do need to explain at least some of it. If you wish to skip this and get to the meaningfull part scroll down to where we took the DMT.
My friends D and E come over early in the morning and we take some DOC. Me and E take 7mg DOC plus 1mg clonazolam (to cancel out the body load of DOC At high doses). D takes 4mg DOC.
I live in the capital and in this country there is a lot of crime. For this reason we go up to this mountain. Its a long hike. About 45 minutes up and at times its about a 45 degree incline. We had to wait like an hour for the bus so by the time we started the hike up the mountain we were tripping. Prolly 1.1 hrs. E is a ++++, me ++ (I do high doses of DOC about once a week). D is still not tripping so much because of his lower dose.
Now this hike up this mountain is not easy. The road is washed out and there are loose rocks all over the place. I am in good shape but its still a bitch. E is not in good shape. I end up taking one of his bags to help him some but Even though I have sweat pouring down my face, I am not tired. I'm sure it is because of the DOC.
When we get to the top we sit down and enjoy the view. You can see the entire capital plus all the surrounding cities. Very amazing but we continue to another mountain that is a better spot. Very difficult climb but so worth it. We set up a blanket and some music to chill for a while.
Me: 3mg DOC IM
D: 2mg DOC IM
It takes like 5 minutes but after that we are both at +++++. E had already been at that level for the past hour. D who had taken no clona was experiencing some muscle tremors and because the wind was so strong it was somewhat cold. He said the combination made it painful. I offered him some clona but he enjoys the rush of energy that DOC gives and the clona gets rid of that so he doesn't want any. For me I had a little bit of spasms for ten or fifteen minutes but it wasn't much and then it went away.
Either way after a while the wind was too much and we decide to go back to the other mountain. There was this dog that had found us up there. He was very skinny and obviously starving. We are in a mountain far from civilization and I feel terrible for this dog so I gave him the food I had brought for myself. The poor guy ate it all and decided to come with us for a while. Eventually we lose him but I still can't help feeling bad for the guy.
Anyway, the way we came up the mountain was directly up the face of it. Very steep incline and all grass. For the way back we decide to go down this 'drain' where all the water goes down when it rains. Its carved a passageway through the mountain maybe 25+ feet down. Its really very beautiful and a great experience.
We stayed for an hour or so but then went back. It was our intention to all smoke DMT up there but I really didn't think it was a good idea so after we dropped E off near his house we go to my house to continue as planned. And before I get started I just want to mention that I have never had a worthwhile experience smoking DMT. I have not had any real breakthroughs, even at 60 mg doses. With DOC I don't even have to close my eyes or anything and even a small amount of DMT will have great results.
23 mg of DMT vaporized.
Everything was inhaled in one hit. My lungs, due to the long years of abusing and treating them like shit, are unable to feel DMT. Weed is hard on my lungs for some reason and its hard to hold those in for too long but DMT is different. Anyway normally I do feel it somewhat but this time I felt nothing. I wasnt sure I had inhaled anything so after about 15 seconds I blow it out. A huge cloud of smoke comes out so I definitely did it. Usually DMT causes some very uncomfortable sensations, almost painful and this is before I even blow anything out. Well this time there was nothing. After about 30 seconds I'm starting to think it's not gonna do anything.
I was wrong.
We were watching a video of Tiesto at UMF. As I focus on the music everything is starting to move very fast.
As I focus on the music everything is starting to move very fast.
My friend was sitting on the couch also was moving about 3 or 4 times faster than normal. When I look directly at him he is now moving at normal time but now the music playing in the background begins to go very very fast. I turn to look at the girl that's singing and she is moving normal. I can see her singing and everything is normal. But the sound coming out of her mouth is going much faster, still in synch with her lips somehow.
This was not my first experiencing this sort of thing. After being in this place several times I believe what is happening is that my consciousness is traveling through different dimensions. Now, I'm not going to explain here Einstein's theory of special relativity but it pretty much says that the faster you move through space, the slower you move through time and vise versa. The way I see it, since I'm now traveling through normal space plus some other dimensional space as well, this is going to slow down my movement though time. Of course I don't expect anyone to believe that but it is the way I see it.
I get bored with that and focus on what what is happening on The stage and the laser lights that I have point on the ceiling. The visuals on the stage are amazing. There is no tracers or anything of the sort and nothing is moving or morphing but it is just amazing. It's very difficult to explain what I was seeing but they were colors that I had never seen before. The energy rushing into my body is almost uncontrollable. My body has no choice but to move with the music and all I can think is 'Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit...'
It was all very amazing but that's when I notice the tree. I have this big tapestry of a tree hanging on my wall. I see it everyday and know bery well what this tree looks like. But this wasn't the tree. As I look more deeply into it, somehow even though I did not notice any change, it is again a different tree. But now there is some sort of emotion I'm experiencing and when I give myself to it I begin to sense some sort of communication. This tree continues to change and show me me. It took some time to realize it but after a while I realized what was happening.
The tree was showing me my life. It went through a progression of my life. At first, during my earlier years the tree was very healthy. But In time the tree has become sick. It is dying and decaying. This is not just this lifetime but is showing my the past and future. I really do not like what I see. I am actually a little bit frightened. Now this is no surprise too. I know exactly the things that I've been doing and that they will most likely lead to suffering. But this tree showed me very very well where I was headed. It wasn't just telling me about this life but far, far beyond. It was all very real.
I'm positive this being that was manifesting itself as this tree was trying show me this or perhaps help me in some way. He was not some other form of my self but a completely other entity. I won't explain how I'm so sure of this because it would make this much longer and not sure I even can but theres is no doubt in my mind.
The experience left me drained. This is not my first time with DMT and afterwards I have plenty of energy but this time it was exhausting.
This is not my first time with DMT and afterwards I have plenty of energy but this time it was exhausting.
Usually I repeat the experience a couple times but this time I had no desire to do so. Quite the opposite actually. At least for some time. Nothing about the experience made me feel like I was having a bad trip. Some of the things were frightening to realize but nonetheless, very rewarding.
This experience has left me with much to think about and a very strong desire and intention to change what I saw. My life needs to change and that change needs to happen right now. This have never been so clear about this. I have struggled with this for quite some time now but it's been very difficult. I now believe I can do it and have a very strong conviction to do so as well as a new ally.
Next was D.
I really wanted him to see this tree so I switched spots with him and gave him the DMT pipe. Soon after he is in some sort of trance. He was looking at the wall where the tree was but then focused in the space in front of him more like staring at the ceiling. His eyes and mouth were completely wide open. The expression on his face was of awe but there was more to it. He started to stick out his tongue in a very erotic licking motion. This went on for quite some time pretty much until the end of the trip maybe 15 to 20 minutes.
This is what he said happened. At first he was looking at the video and the kights on the wall and it was great. But then he saw the tree. It wasn't on the wall but coming towards him. At some point another entity came into him And began controlling his body. It made him close his eyes and stick out his tongue. The entire time eyes were actually wide open as far as they could possibly be the whole time. This is still mind-blowing for him.
The moment that he (thought he) closed his eyes the space in the room began to bend and do all sorts of funny things. To the right of him was a passageway. There was a lot of creatures going through the tunnel. They had legs and arms but were not human. Next this entity was taking my body and began to examine it. I was up in some sort of floating machine that would flip, twist and scan me. After it was done it showed whatever it was that it was trying to do (he doesn't know) and my body was sucked into some sort of wormhole looking thing and thats the last that he saw me until 'opened' his eyes.
He was not frightened or anything throughout the experience but he was sure his eyes were closed and that he had no control of his body. He is sure that other creature was in his body controlling it while he was in the other place.
I think this was the most either of us ever [got] out of an experience. Those images are still very clear and will not leave. I actually feel at least a little more control over my problems. In the past I've felt as if I will never be able to break these habits but now there is hope. -shunyata
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