Citation: the black dragon. "Wishing It Never Ended: An Experience with Pregabalin (exp107163)". Erowid.org. May 20, 2020. erowid.org/exp/107163
So let me start off with a little history. I have never done any illegal drugs due mainly to my lack of trust in obtaining a pure quality product
I have never done any illegal drugs due mainly to my lack of trust in obtaining a pure quality product
however I have had bouts of abuse with prescription drugs and a long period of alcohol abuse in my twenties and thirties. I am currently on 100 mg per day of time release oxycodone aka oxyneo and 3x5mg percocets perday for a herniated disc and have been taking this regimen for several years for associated nerve damage. I ran out of pain meds a few days early for the first time which sets the stage for my adventure.
So I am about 12 hours into my withdrawl and staring to feel a bit sick. I had read that pregabalin could be used to ease opiate witdrawl and since I had been just prescribed some by a new doctor eager to save me from the evils of narcotics I popped 4 of the 150 mg pills and went to bed. The time is now midnight. At about 2 am I am starting to thrash about now getting into some serious withdrawl pain and god awful restless leg syndrome which is far worse than any pain I could imagine so I take another pill and wait. It does nothing so I take another, 1 more at 3 am and 1 more at 4am. Right after I took the last one I lay down and it hit me like a ton of bricks.
I am suddenly very concerned that I had fucked up as I had just swallowed another 150 mg but figure I will just ride it out and see what happens. I had a sudden rush of numbness unlike anything I have ever experienced. Not quite as pleasurable as a clean opiate buzz but at the same time far more interesting and more intense. I passed out shortly after this and woke up about an hour and a half later. The only sleep I would have all night. I continued through my withdrawl without much relief from the physical symptoms but mentally much more at ease. I experience mild hallucinations all through the night and morning. I would see shapes and people in my bedroom for a quick second then it would disappear. Everything had this glow around it like an energy surounding every shape. Also. When I closed my eyes and played some classic rock the music came alive with a visual show to the beat of the music. Just mild visuals but still very present.
I managed to survive til my doctors appointment at 230 pm that day. I was hoping the doctor would let my refill go a couple of days early or I would be screwed. I got off the couch not realising I had dozed off and my appointment was in ten minutes. My wife was up at this point (NOTE: I sleep in a hospital bed in another room due to my injury and our different sleep habits so the events of the previous night did not disturb her) so my wife says 'ran outta pills didnt you?'
I told her that yes I had as she could tell I was in withdrawl now. I told her I had to get to my appointment and I stumbled to the front hall and made 4 attempts to pick my shoe up. My wife asked if I was ok to drive as she could see me struggling. She did not realize I had taken all the pregabalin and just thought I was weak from witthdrawl. I assured her I was fine and went out to the car.
Once I got outside I felt a little better and got in the car. The doctors was only a 5 minute drive so I was confident I could do it. In retrospect it was stupid as it was a very scary drive
In retrospect it was stupid as it was a very scary drive
but in my frame of mind I could do no wrong and I knew that I would be fine. The doctor released my script and I waited anxiously to have it filled.
While I was waiting to have it filled I walked around the store talking to someone who wasnt there. Someone from a tv show I was watching earlier. Although I could sense the presence very strongly. Everything had that glow to it still. I should mention that this whole time since the onset I have been barely able to read and have difficulty speaking. (Not sure how I made it through the doctors appointment lol.) Anyways I had this very strong feeling that everything wax going to be ok. I felt loved and that I could do no wrong. This feeling was way better than anything I had ever gotten from opiates. I was very saddened suddenly when I realized it was going to end. I went and sat to wait for my scrip to be filled.
At this point I took a very marked interest in the light shining onto the waxed floor. I watched the pattern slowly melt into itself for what seemed like an eternity. My name was called and I got my script. I went to the car and downed 3 20 mg oxyneos to combat the withdrawl and drove home. By about 6 or 7 pm I was back to baseline and not happy to be there but very happy to have expeienced what I had expeienced. I vowed to try it again in the future though I am not sure how I will hide it from my wife. She sort of frowns on drug abuse and said what I did was stupid after I confessed. I told her I disagreed
Even as I write this 2 days later I still feel some connection to the world I was in and feel I have connected with the universe in some greater way. Like I had peered through a doorway no sober mind can see.
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