DOSE:

repeated

insufflated

Methamphetamine

(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

90 lb

It started out for fun, it seemed liked it would be easy to stop at any point. I have kicked heroin, pills, numerous other drugs cold turkey. Meth has a funny hold on me though. I think I'm good when I stop but then the psychosis takes over. Irrational, delusional, psychosis. My biggest fear was dying, always had a giant fear of that. My biggest fear now is that dying is no longer my biggest fear.

I am a shell of my former self. My soul has already left and all that remains is a robot. A robot that sleeps all day, that just wants to die, that will strike out in an anger that has never been seen before. My kids have suffered enough, my relationship has suffered as he is going through the same. We will never be the same people, I will never be the same. It seems easier to just go, to let my shell find my soul and be one again. This hurts too much to go on. Life will never be the same.

I was warned, I dismissed it. It's too late for me, help yourself.

Exp Year: 2015	ExpID: 106981
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 33
Published: Apr 29, 2019	Views: 1,181
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Methamphetamine (37) : Hangover / Days After (46), Post Trip Problems (8), Addiction & Habituation (10), Unknown Context (20)