Citation: GR. "Ritalin Is Bad!!: An Experience with Methylphenidate (exp10684)". Erowid.org. Nov 19, 2001. erowid.org/exp/10684
I was administered Ritalin as a child (8 years of age) till i was 17 when I told the 'doctor' who was writing my prescriptions to 'Get fucked'.
I WAS diagnosed with A.D.D but i have put that down to something else. Lazyness. If I dont care about it, I wont learn about it. Computers and Music are the only things i have ever been drawn to in my life. I have been playing Drums and Guitar for 7 years now and I have a Diploma of Systems Technology. Its kinda like a comp science degree.
If I could change anything about my upbringing it would be Ritalin. For the first 5 years ritalin helped me in school. I started realising when i got to about year 9 that Ritalin made me antisocial, negative, angry(2) and VERY DEPRESSED. When i wasn't under its potent effect i was social and happy. I had my personality back so to speak! Another major thing that made me realise it was bad was the fact that it 'sucks' your creativity away(1)...
I put my girlfriend of 2 years at the time through so much shit simply because i was either 'on it' or 'straight'. She loved it when i was straight cause i talked to her and was nice and attentive...
1 : I have no trouble at all with sitting down to any style of music and coming up with half decent and interesting drum rythyms or fills when im straight. When on Ritalin i was unco-ordinated and had trouble expressing any real emotion hence ill performance! i was almost 'afraid' of the kit.
Before i decieded to stop taking it i was 17 yrs old 85 KG and on 80 MG a day. 2 x 40 MG at 8:00 am and 12:00 pm. by 4 o'clock in the afternoon i was good again.
2: I was always known as the school psycho but it was really only while i was on ritalin. otherwise im a really easy going guy!! I hit people, kicked bins, abused teachers and friends, broke my hand on a metal locker and was a general prick when i was on Ritalin.
One night, earlier this year i took an overdose of Ritalin. I had old tablets laying around from when i used to take it. I ingested 7 of the 10mg ritalin tablets and went out to a club. With in 3 hours of taking it i started to become non responsive... i just couldnt be fucked.... its a hard concept to grasp but i 'lost all thought'. i couldn't think... do you know how long 9 hours is?? its really long.
My girlfriend thought i was going to die, and so did i. I lay in bed with a heart beat of 190 till 7 am when it wore off and i finally got to sleep.
Coupled with the high heart beat and severe loss of brain power i was shaking uncontrolably and was freezing cold. It was the scariest experiece of my life and i will never touch Ritalin again.
Nowadays i kinda have my life on track but i have no doubt in my mind that it would be a much better one if i had never taken Ritalin...
- GR, 18
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