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I Suffer Chronic Fatigue and Pain
Modafinil
by anonymousholiday
Citation:   anonymousholiday. "I Suffer Chronic Fatigue and Pain: An Experience with Modafinil (exp106264)". Erowid.org. Jan 17, 2020. erowid.org/exp/106264

 
DOSE:
T+ 0:00
50 mg oral Modafinil (pill / tablet)
  T+ 24:00 100 mg oral Modafinil (pill / tablet)

BODY WEIGHT: 8.3 st


Experience From Almost Straight Edge

50 mg yesterday 10am
100 mg today 10am

Bit of background:
I have joint hypermobility syndrome, resulting in various chronic pains and apparently chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia. I was depressed for 5 years and became very anxious up until 2 years ago, I rarely get depressed now or anxious, if I do it is not long lasting. I can officially say I beat depression!

I take NO medications. I do not drink alcohol often and I do not have caffeine in my diet, I eat fairly healthily, I am very petite so I react more easily, I need smaller doses, etc.
I am very petite so I react more easily, I need smaller doses, etc.


symptoms: pain, fatigue.

Anyway, I'm on holiday in Spain, so I was able to buy this over counter for Ä42, which is cheaper than online, and is more like £30 at current exchange rate. I tried 50mg yesterday morning took over an hour to kick in for me, I had a request to help with something online and I did it super quick, I had energy, and I never do. I was tapping with my fingers, then and wanted to make the most of my day... so I left the hotel.

I didnít have much appetite so I forced half a wrap down and saved the rest for later. Eating is still important even if your brain isnít telling you youíre hungry. I wanted to get to the other side of the town (1.5 miles away) and I usually feel completely hammered if I walk it, so I assessed bus / taxi possibilities, and then ended up walking it anyway. I usually have great difficulty walking for a long time, I didnít have this problem, the pain was there but it was like the energy meant I could push through it. I did feel euphoric, I found a beautiful area and I was taken away, Iím sure it is beautiful to me usually but I was more enthused than I usually would be.

I remember thinking at peak that I certainly thought this was enough (50mg) and I really wouldnít need/want more than that, considering the half life (12-14 hours). I felt like it went very slowly? Unfortunately at about 3pm I steadily felt it wear off, at about 5pm I decided to walk back to the hotel and settle for a bit. Again, I ended up just walking it. I felt like if I stopped and sat down for a while, when I started moving again I had tolerance to the pain/fatigue again. I got to my hotel I assume at about 6, and then I felt fatigue/exhausted. I do not think this was a come down as this is how I feel generically due to my condition. I felt as though I was no longer on this medication. It had worn off. I took it easy, and finished my wrap, relaxed until 10pm and then forced my fatiguey self to go out and try enjoy the night life, I figure alcohol would have little complication with the drug as it felt like it wore off. I ended up walking 1.5miles again, so although I didnít feel the effects of the pill anymore, I donít believe I would have managed this normally? I wasnít that hungry but knew I should eat so I had 2 tapas dishes.

I felt fairly tired/ not particularly interested, but after I had a drink and started interacting with people my energy was up again, enough to enjoy myself, in total I had 2 vodka and lemon fanta & a jager bomb (it only takes me one drink to get drunk usually as Iím a total light weight and Spanish mixers are 50/50). I felt drunk but when refusing drinks people seemed confused and said I didnít seem drunk! I stayed out til 4 and got a taxi home, slept fine, was woken early by someone which was irritating, I felt hungover but I think this was more tiredness.

I checked my phone pedometer, turns out Iíve walked 11 miles in the last 24 hours, I did not think it was this much, and this was just during having phone battery (which I didnít for the whole time). This is really excessive, I donít regret but I think I will learn from this, it is not good for my condition to do this much physically, so I should try to keep track of this and not over do it even though it feels ok at the time. Like my note about hunger.

Summary:

(-):
NOT MUCH
decreased appetite (1 wrap, 2 tapas whole day)
awareness of new pains, doesnít concern me (but not much different on old, I could just get on with it more)
time slows for me
if focusing on too many things, it is not as effective, focus on one.
slight light sensitivity (I had sunglasses on all day so this didnít bother me)
very slight pain in/behind eyes and I had a weird warm rush to head once

(+):
increased focus
euphoria
social interactions are easier/confidence
not smarter per say but better able to put my existing intelligence/skills to better use with the energy and focus

Day 2 100mg

I decided as its my last day here I should try the 100mg, I forced a small baguette for breakfast (Iím never hungry this early but I know I should eat).

11:30 am
although I do not feel the effects as yesterday, I think its helped my hangover considerably. I noticed some sounds I donít usually. Music is awesome, I just seem to enjoy it more.

11:40 am
feels like a lot longer than ten minutes. music is really awesome.

12:21
feel amazing (happy, euphoric) Music is even more amazing. going to do some freelance work (design)

12:38
done work.. quick?

1:30
Incredible euphoria (to me, I have never done any drugs). I can feel it in my tummy my legs my arms. I realise now that although I have never done it, modafinil may have effects that are alike but a lot less strong than MDMA. Scents are awesome.

2pm
Iíve walked 1.5 miles to other side of town again

3pm
I left a shop into the bright sunny outside and for first time got a weird sensitivity to the light, like my focus was a bit intense and gave me a acute nausea feeling.

3.20pm
Thirsty so I order what I think is going to be a fruity mock tail but turns out to be alcoholic.. uh oh.

4pm
Head ache is gone but I feel a little weird from the alcohol. From memory I walked around for a little longer, sat on the beach for a while taking in the sun, then I felt tired and yet walked 1.5 miles back. I feel as if it has worn off and the hangover I was hiding with modafinil is shining through.

It sucks, Iím hungry by 8 pm but I am too tired to do anything about it, I have all the lights off and my mac screen on minimum brightness and I feel rough, hungry, headachey, but I do believe that this is more of the feeling of a bad hangover than a comedown.. which would make complete sense.

Final thoughts:

I feel like other than the peak of this drug, it makes me feel normal, but that would make sense as I suffer chronic fatigue and pain, so effectively I have self prescribed correctly and it does what its meant to for me! Noticed the euphoria probably mild MDMA like feeling more than the other effects.

Focusing with this stuff probably takes practice, if I have a few things then I do not focus too well. Awakeness/energy is confusing as I manage to walk much much further than I usually am capable throughout the day and yet I have moments where I am tired and it seems to lose effect after a few hours. Not good for a regular hangover cure.

I donít suffer anxiety etc. often but I would assume this wouldnít help if I did suffer. Senses are heightened: spray some good smelling things, listen to some nice (calm) music, eat good foods, be warm, BE COMFORTABLE, do not wear uncomfortable shoes especially, as I learnt, I noticed new pains more.

I do not take any medications and I donít drink too often, have caffeine etc. I feel very comfortable with myself since I began to live like this, like I do not have unexpected mood swings and have control if I am in a mood I do not want (with exception to fatigue). Because of this I do not think I will self medicate daily
I do not think I will self medicate daily
, and I do not think I will medicate with higher volumes, I will probably find that this drug will work best if I take the smaller amount of 50mg maybe once a week on my worst (fatigue) day, and only ever in the morning.

Exp Year: 2015ExpID: 106264
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 19 
Published: Jan 17, 2020Views: 1,027
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Modafinil (217) : General (1), Performance Enhancement (50), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), First Times (2), Alone (16)

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