Citation: Dilligence. "TKO A Deadly Combination: An Experience with Ketamine & Alprazolam (exp106217)". Erowid.org. Feb 18, 2016. erowid.org/exp/106217
I'll keep this short because most of the details are irrelevant.
I was having a very hard time in life and I was habitually using ketamine and I was dependent on Xanax. I had been taking at least 10mg of Xanax every night to sleep and I was constantly abusing every psychedelic drug I could get my hands on. Of all the drugs I tried, ketamine became the biggest problem. I loved it, I still do. When I was on it I felt the void. I looked into the void and it looked back into me and I knew my place in the world and felt peace. I FELT PEACE! I cannot describe how big that was for me.
Anyway, the big problem I had with ketamine was my complete inability to stop myself from acquiring and doing more.
the big problem I had with ketamine was my complete inability to stop myself from acquiring and doing more.
One evening, I was doing rails of some really good K. I would do one large rail roughly every hour. I was totally out of it. I only knew to do another rail when my hour long tv show would start a new episode on Netflix and I would say, 'should I do more? why, yes I should.'
Well, that continued for roughly 6 hours until it was about time for bed. So, I took my nightly Xanax (i.e., 10mg). I knew that I shouldn't do any more K at this point but I did not have the ability to stop myself. Like I was on autopilot, I went and did another huge rail. The first thought I had was, 'well, you're gonna die now.' I was right.
I went to sit down in my living room. When my parents arrived I was incoherent and I was breathing about 3 to 4 times per minute. They called an ambulance and my heart stopped beating in the back of that ambulance.
Needless to say, I survived but life since then has been extremely difficult. I went through detox. It was roughly a month of Xanax withdrawals, which is complete hell. I have craved K almost every day since then. I know it can and will take over my life again but I cannot move the thought of that feeling from my mind and body.
Ketamine is extremely dangerous for some people (i.e., people like me) because it will take over your soul. Another thing to keep in mind is the incredibly dangerous mixture of ketamine and any other depressant drug (e.g., alcohol, benzos, barbiturates). I'm lucky I survived. Be safe.
[Reported Dose: 1g K and 10mg xanax]
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