Citation: Zandig. "A Rough Start to a Rewarding First Time: An Experience with 4-HO-MET (exp105821)". Erowid.org. Oct 10, 2019. erowid.org/exp/105821
||(powder / crystals)
First, my notes as I wrote them last night, and then a summary of the trip as best I can remember and describe it.
7:00 PM - On a full stomach, with zero drugs of any kind in my system, approximately 5 minutes after I finish eating dinner, I parachute approximately 7mg of 4-HO-MET. It's probably closer to 6mg because I spilling a tiny bit. I'm excited for my first proper experience with psychedelics, as an earlier experiment with San Pedro mescaline extract was a miserable failure, the taste giving me such nausea I stopped drinking and poured the juice out before feeling any effects. Right now the house is quiet, but my roommates are coming home in a few hours. I will be tripping alone in my room. The one thing I'm worried about is that when my roommate comes home, if the 4-HO-MET is active at that time, the dog's loud, annoying, high-pitched yelping at my roommate that the dog does every time my roommate comes home will cause my trip to take a turn for the worse. Hopefully that won't be a concern as I usually don't mind that idiot dog when she does stupid crap like that but I really don't know what my mental state will be like during the trip.
7:05 PM - slight weird feeling in my stomach, although it's probably because I ate a lot of food for dinner and I'm very full. Could be the 4-HO-MET; I hope I don't throw up and waste not only the chemical but also my dinner.
7:30 PM - My head feels a little heavy, other than that nothing. I'm a bit restless, but I think that's just nervousness.
8:00 PM - Effects have come in, very minor but they're there. Most notable is I'm feeling happier and more energetic. There is definitely a slight shift in my perception but I can't even describe it. It's just...different. Like everything is breathing, very very slightly. Like all of these inanimate objects around me, the walls, the ceiling, this bottle of water, are all barely, almost imperceptively alive. I'm going to get away from the computer as I've read that computer screens tend to mute effects of psychedelics.
8:40 PM - 5 minutes ago I thought the effects of the drug were already waning but little did I realize they were only beginning. I see now that the effects of 4-HO-MET come in waves and I am once again bathed in an empathogenic glow. I am laughing hysterically at nothing, a certain lightness flowing through my body that I've never felt before. There is a minor stimulatory effect. I'm glad I'm alone while I trip, for if anyone were to see me I would surely look like a madman. I am beginning to see closed-eye kaleidoscopic visuals, reality is definitely beginning to warp. Unbelievable that I am feeling these effects only 7mg in! There's a strange taste in my mouth. This is very, very interesting. It's starting to sink in just how long of a trip I'm in for and I hope that doesn't turn this trip sour. I'm going to let my notes go as the effects are really starting to take hold.
11:38 PM - I'm sorry I abandoned my notes, but I had an irresistible urge to vomit right after I typed the previous note.
12:17 AM - I'm in the comedown phase now, the main symptom is my gums are numb and I feel like I've been smiling for hours. I probably have. My time dilation has been insane this entire trip. I think I'm going to abandon my notes for a bit.
1:01 AM - On the comedown still, I really don't like this bodyload. I can't even begin to try to get to sleep, at least not with all the lights off, as I start getting CEV/black background visuals of scary faces. Best to let at least a little bit of light into the room so the scary faces don't come out. I wish I had a benzo to ease with the comedown. I still occasionally have the urge to puke but since the first instance of vomiting nothing's come up. I don't think anything ever will.
11:15 AM - I spent the last few minutes lying in my bed staring at the ceiling. The spackle comes to life before my eyes, indescribable and cool scenes unfolding; every time I move my eyes, I am greeted to another scene, sometimes it's a pattern that appears throughout the whole ceiling.
9:39 AM - I woke up about 25 minutes ago and took a shower. I'm very hungry.
9:43 AM - Made some breakfast, nothing fancy, just cereal, toast and juice. I don't feel hungover or tired at all and I will probably have a normal day at home today.
This was my first ever psychedelic experience. I took a low dose because I didn't want to trip too hard, but I guess I'm sensitive to tryptamines or something because...well, you'll see.
From 8-8:15 PM, I took a walk in the cold night, not really feeling anything. I figured I hadn't taken enough, as surely the drug would have taken hold by then. Boy, was I wrong. Very shortly after 8:40 PM, as mentioned in my notes, I felt extremely nauseous and rushed to the upstairs bathroom. I began tripping hard as I puked my guts out. While I was originally puking, I was freaking out, thinking I had taken bromo-dragonfly instead of 4-HO-MET, as I had recently read the reports from 2009 of the '2C-B-FLY' batch that was actually bromo-dragonfly. I would think back to this freakout 2 more times throughout the trip, each time retconning it so I was also thinking that I had accidentally taken something else. The first time I mentally revisited it, I was thinking about an NBOMe as well as bromo-dragonfly, and the second time I added DOC to the mix. But given how the trip turned out, it was definitely 4-HO-MET. The rest of the trip was very strange, with absolutely insane time dilation. In the bathroom there were no clocks and virtually no real way of knowing how much time had passed. Seconds felt like centuries, every breath shaved years off me. Later in the trip, I would describe the purge, where I was puking my guts out, as the building of the pyramids, my mind taking many trips through time. I'll describe the rest of the bathroom part of the trip in unordered scenes as I really have no idea when each thing happened.
There were 3 worlds in the bathroom, the 'real' world where my face is over the toilet bowl retching (but no actual vomit after the initial purge). That is a brief interruption from the other two worlds. The world I spent the most time in was sitting on the floor, my back to the tub, near the toilet but not over it. One scene that I saw many times was my cup of water on the sink counter, the faucet with its jeweled handle behind it, the light hitting everything just right so this dirty faucet, generic green plastic cup and dirty mirror behind it all worked together to create the most beautiful image I have ever seen in my life. I gazed upon this masterpiece many times and it was my favorite visual element of the trip. Sometimes I would slip out of the retching into the toilet mindstate back into the mindstate where I was sitting normally and I was treated to interesting scenes in the toilet water, created by reflections and shadows. The first scene was what I described at the time as 'Aztec dragons' flying around in circles, eating each other, a kind of combination of Ouroboros and Aztec-style art. After that scene ended (I was sad to see it go), a more pleasant scene of warping water lilies appeared, which I enjoyed but not nearly as much as the Aztec dragons.
The clumps of hair on the dirty bathroom floor were moving around. It wasn't unpleasant, but I could take it or leave it. A bug crawled out from behind the trash can but I shooed it away and it was never seen again.
Also in the toilet water I saw a morph of Aidan Gillen's character from The Dark Knight Rises and Bane, also from The Dark Knight Rises. I thought that was pretty interesting but it wasn't around for long.
There were multiple attempts made at introspection in the world where I was sitting on the floor but no real breakthroughs. I kept getting distracted by my own thoughts.
The other world I enjoyed was standing up and looking into the mirror. My reflection seemed like a pretty cool guy and I enjoyed his company. I would stand up to refill my cup of water, which was part of a failed attempt to keep track of time by counting how many times I had filled the cup, which would somehow translate into being able to guesstimate how much time had passed. It didn't work. Watching water come out of the faucet was very interesting, the water colorfully shimmering in the fluorescent light.
The first time I was actually able to get a rough estimate of what time it was was when my roommate's girlfriend went to bed. She always goes to bed relatively early so I guessed at that point it was somewhere around 10:00.
I brushed my teeth at some point. I knew that I had to, because leaving the vomit residue in my mouth would be very bad for my enamel. Even while tripping I was very mindful of my dental hygiene. Brushing my teeth was an ordeal I can only compare to the founding of Rome. I always felt like I wasn't brushing properly, but when I spit, the amount that came out seemed pretty normal. After I brushed my teeth, I could feel them better and I apologized to them for not having gone to a dentist in nearly 5 years.
Multiple times in the bathroom I thought that there was no other place in the world I could conceivably be than that bathroom. I could not mentally bring myself to leave, but eventually I did, after I was sure everybody else in the house had finally gone to bed. I steeled my courage and headed downstairs, the trip down being fairly uneventful but still nerve-wracking. I made it into my room safe and sound and promptly began instant messaging one of my friends, telling him about my experience. Looking back at the chatlog I came across as a crazy person, but what's done is done.
I listened to some music and talked to friends online. I tried to watch a fractal screensaver program but it oddly wasn't doing anything for me. Most music didn't really sound all that different as I had been led to believe it would, however, 'New Tomorrow' by Miami Nights 1984 was EXTREMELY pleasing to listen to.
I would occasionally get up to go to the downstairs bathroom to get some more water and to urinate, the nausea having mostly passed. I didn't like my reflection in the downstairs bathroom's mirror, though. That guy seemed like a dick but I was nice to his face so I don't think he ever found out I disliked him.
I don't remember much from the time in my room, except that shortly after midnight I started to feel a numbness in my gums and/or my upper lip, my facial muscles feeling really stretched, and also a tenseness in my right forearm, as well as the effects beginning to wane. I realized this was the comedown and about an hour later tried to go to bed. It was VERY tough going to sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I would get distracting and sometimes scary CEVs. I tried to take the edge off by listening to music but it didn't work this time. In particular, 'YYZ' by Rush was quite unpleasant, the percussion really agitating me. I fell asleep twice but woke up an unknown amount of time later due to hallucinations, dreams, or an odd combination of the two, I still haven't figured out exactly what they are. Sometime after 3:00 AM I definitely went to sleep for good, waking up at 5:30 feeling mentally over it but physically still a bit worn out. After going to the bathroom, I went back to sleep, a sleep that was rudely interrupted by my roommates making a bunch of noise all around my room from 6:45 until 9. I've gotten worse sleep sober, though.
All in all, an extremely interesting experience. There was a rough patch, but I persevered and turned the trip into something I will not forget. I doubt I could do this every weekend, as I didn't like the bodyload on the comedown and the vomiting at the beginning was really not pleasant. I'll probably trip again but it won't be for a while. The real problem with tripping is I can't put everything that I want to put into writing, some thoughts and feelings are just beyond description. I didn't get it before when I would read or hear people talking about that phenomenon, but I totally get it now. Was my trip good? Was it bad? It simply 'was.' It was a force unto itself and unlike anything I have ever experienced before.
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