Citation: Satori. "Phenethylamine Clairvoyance: An Experience with 2C-E (exp104546)". Erowid.org. Nov 30, 2015. erowid.org/exp/104546
My first experience with psychedelics dates to my first ayahuasca trip one year ago. I tried it in a context of ritual magic, but the experience opened my eyes about the inconsistency of such superstitious thoughts, and I turned to a more concrete relationship with reality: I did not believe in the supernatural any more, but I still craved for even a smallest hint of praeternaturality to lurk into my life. It of course did not happen, and further experiences with ayahuasca and shrooms did not give me the wanted breaking of the rules of nature: the separation between the external world and my internal perception has always been clear to me.
As a consequence, I searched something that could relieve me from this thirst for magic, and I bumped into 'The Doors of Perception' by Huxley, which lead me to the study of Mahayana Buddhism and specifically the prajnaparamita sutra and the Zen schools of Japan. At the time of the experience I had quite solved my issues with reality, and was in my way to accept the vacuity of things in themselves and the uncorrelation of the worldly events.
My boyfriend and I resolved some little arguments we had had during the week and had a relaxing Friday evening. We called a good friend of ours who is an experienced tripper, to provide good company and a feeling of safety. Reminiscent of the Ayahuasca trip, I wanted to perform some kind of ritual; after a bit of discussion with my fellows we decided to just make the best out of the experience, exploring forests in the moonlight and following our feelings and perceptions during the trip.
I woke up in the morning preparing to have a relaxing day. I met my boyfriend and a friend of ours and the three of us went to my house on the lakeside. The sight is beautiful and the house is near the top of a hill, surrounded by forests, valleys and mountains. We cooked spaghetti with tomatoes, calamari and mantis shrimp - it tasted delicious and was accompanied by just a bit of fresh white wine. We waited late afternoon when the sun began to sink behind the mountains and then we decided to dose.
The product was a total amount of 105 mg in crushed pills; there was also an unknown amount of harmless additives, probably added to make the substance more palatable and swallowable (15 mg of powder is probably not sufficient to make a whole pill). We thus dissolved the product in water - it does work, because chlorhydrate salt [hydrochloride salt] of 2C-E is very soluble - and weighed the exact amount of water in proportion to the desired dose. Since we dissolved all the substance in 210 ml of water, we took 40 ml of solution each, in a way that each one of us had a dose of 20 mg of 2C-E.
Onset (ca. 90 minutes)
After drinking the medicine-tasting solution, we packed our stuff (warm shirts, jackets, fruit juice, water, cookies, a flute and some hashish) and walked through the forest to the top of the hill. We watched the last light of sunset, the appearing of the lights of the far houses in the valley and along the lake shore, and shared a small joint. I played the flute a bit while we waited for the effects to begin.
As the sun went down, slight perceptual changes started to be noticeable, along with a warm feeling along the backbone. A cold wind began to blow, and we wore our jackets. As the last lights of the sunset disappeared the substance's effects dramatically peaked, reaching an intense plateau.
Peak (ca. 5 hours)
The moon was very bright, enlightening the nearby trees and our faces, and a sudden increase in its brightness made us aware of the coming of the effect. The top of the trees had begun to melt, and the vision was fluidified in a set of floating elements, as if the things we were seeing were being reflected by the slow waves of a calm sea. At the borders of my field of sight I glimpsed bright lights and geometrical structures. The forest seemed to breathe, and the effect was greatly enhanced when we stared at one single detail.
We were on a clear space atop of a cliff. Three paths deployed to different directions, sinking into the darkness of the forest. We started from the east path, which went along the side of the hill, without going up nor down. The reflexes of the moonlight on the shiny leaves looked like little fires which shined everywhere. The shapes of the plants resembled those of animated creatures, and the path was just a bright line going through the blackness of the night. Our experienced friend was leading the group, looking very confident with exploring the woods at night. I followed him closely, and my boyfriend kept holding on to my backpack to avoid to get lost: he was quite disoriented, and at certain moments he seemed to be lost in inner visions. He made us stop at a bright spot where no trees were hiding the moonlight, and we sat on the fresh grass, talking about our impressions.
The effects came in waves, which modulated some smaller steps of growing sensations: the beauty of the enhancement of our perceptions grew until coming to a sudden stop and a high awareness of reality, and the the melting of sensations came again. The physical feeling was pretty warm and soft, like a gentle caress; in some of the darkest passages in the forest, I sought my boyfriend's hand to control the slight sense of dissociation which sometimes arose. The overall body high was enjoyable.
I started talking about my research in Buddhist worldviews: the impermanence and vacuity of all beings; the inessentiality of relations, and the very concrete simplicity of it all were suddenly clear to me. People always seek the truth in supernatural or metaphysical constructions, but none of that does really exist. The world is just the world, no matter what politicians, religious chiefs, self-declared magicians and gurus say. Humanity is just a huge set of propagators of information - a propagation which is indeed the only noticeable and durable, yet highly inefficient consequence of all of our struggles. We can devote ourselves to this task of growth, or to help others we love, or even to the growth of our ego; but in no ways must we confuse our very deeds with our wishes and expectations about them. Our actions are not one with their own purposes, and the things we consider important during our lives are most often uncorrelated casual events with no consequences. Nothing is fundamental apart from our own life, and life itself is only an accidental condition which aggregates our ego and gives us the opportunity to produce effects on reality. Psychedelics decrease the functional connectivity of the brain, but this does not let in the perceptions of invisible noumenoi which it usually hides; it rather makes thought less dispersive, and brings our intellect right to the point. It is of course a kind meta-cognition, and allows to unmask the fallacies of the everyday thinking. Furthermore, it does not deliver the actual impression of supernatural beings and events, and reality is always reachable, even if we might need some effort to get in touch with it.
After a time which seemed to be infinite, we went back to our open place near the cliff. We watched the clock: it was only 10 pm, even though we thought we had talked and walked all night long. We drank some blueberry juice and ate our cookies. We then decided to go through the path which headed north of our place. The initial impression was a black wall of darkness, but as we passed through the entrance of the forest the path became clearly visible. I was leading this time, and the shapes of the plants around the path resembled nymphs and dryads, with woody faces and open mouths. In some dark spots my vision was invaded by hexagonal patterns representing a stylized Taijitu. When the vision was more confused because of the darkness, the strange effects were more visible. We reached a higher place where we could see the whole lake, and stared at the lights on the shore which made up shapes of huge spaceships floating in the interstellar space. We then started to notice the voices of the birds and to try to recognize them. The 'important questions' were answered, and now we could just enjoy the rest of the trip.
We sat there and finished the remaining cookies and juice, and the went back home. The effects did not fade gradually; they rather disappeared suddenly. We were suddenly very hungry, and we grilled some sausages, and ate some bread with dried tomatoes and truffle-flavoured cheese.
We then smoked the last joint to calm down and sleep well, and had a very restful sleep. The next day we experienced a bit of tiredness, but really manageable and somehow pleasant.
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