Citation: Brahman. "Realization Of The Self, Positivity For Others: An Experience with Syrian Rue & Huasca Combo (Syrian Rue & Mimosa tenuiflora) (exp103254)". Erowid.org. Oct 11, 2018. erowid.org/exp/103254
First off I want to say I am more than willing to testify (ALONE) in court when it comes to my personal drug use, as it is what I believe, my 'religion' per say, and no one can argue otherwise. If the church of Saint Daime can legally use Ayahuasca, then I have every right to use any substance I desire. If anyone tries to persecute me for my beliefs in the use of drugs for spiritual or therapeutic purposes, then they are in fact the ones breaking the 1st Amendment set in place by the Constitution and infringing on my rights. Anyone who infringes on my Human Rights is a criminal, simple as that.
I don't know exactly how much I took, but it was at least 10-15 grams of it powdered, possibly up to 30 grams. I dropped it all into my mouth then tried to swallow it down with water; it was very chunky and dry like cinnamon. I almost gagged. I headed upstairs where I waited a little bit before chugging a cup of deep red Mimosa brew, very nasty. After less then 5 minutes, while waiting on my bed I felt air come up for burping. I burped a few times, sitting up with my hand to my mouth balled up into a fist. It came up into my mouth, I tried to hold it in, then I swallowed it back down. It came back up then I knew I couldn't hold it in.
I moved like lightning across the room to the bath room, puke getting everywhere; on the door, the blankets, the carpet, the bathroom tiles, the sink, etc. For some reason I decided to throw up in the sink. I threw up at least 12 times, plus a lot of gagging and burping. I was under the effects of the Rue very fast, within 10-15 min of taking it, my entire vision delaying a second, as if the astral realm were lagging a second behind. I told my brothers I could clean it up at the time, and that I would do it tomorrow morning. They went to watch a movie and left me alone in the darkness of the room.
The period of time that passed now was at least 45-60 minutes since I took the Rue. I lay down to try to feel better, what with all the nausea. At one point very early on somehow the deepest depths of my consciousness made a surprising shift, and I experienced what people call the Mystical Experience (I have much knowledge on the subject as I have immense interest in it), which I had had once before (on LSA). During this time anyone who would have seen me that didn't understand what I was on would have put me in a Looney Bin. Very early on I experienced what I can only describe as Pure Love for all people (what many people call God, but I realized everything in existence was Pure Love, contradictory, I know. I believe it was the exact same thing Jesus and Gautama experienced). My Will Power, which is normally quite weak and pathetic, multiplied 1000x, and the NeuroPlasticity I experienced was equal to the LSA experience (I thought I was going to learn every language in the world because I could).
During this time my mind was racing, at one point on the verge of tears, then suddenly acting like I was the most interesting and cool person in the world; I kept saying: What Is It? Where Is it? Let's Play With The Connections (I felt like God, the Self); I Love You God, So Much Beauty, Beauty so much. and I did this for close to at least an hour before my brothers checked up on me. When they came into the room and asked me how it was going, I said: I-I realized something. The highest state of Consciousness, is where you no longer make Distinctions between spiritual and physical. They left and then after a while I began to come down.
A second time I took it early in the morning and had a very similar experience. My main realization (in thought) was what the Ego is: Getting stuck with small things, as in putting more energy into sticking with an ideal or anything really instead of moving on. My attitude toward my brothers and Dad was really positive, but I still felt nauseous, but I had been procrastinating about washing my Dad's car, so I decided to do it (and it was sunny). My Dad's opinion about me seemed very low, and as a result he seemed to think I wanted to steal something from his car.
He wasn't feeling very good either, just sick overall with pains in his body. He came out and watched me for a while. He told me as I was washing his car that he used to enjoy washing cars when he was young. But since I had unlocked my pineal gland for a while, my perception and understanding of people and things increased and as a result by the end of the wash he was having a good time.
To me this was a huge lesson, and I wont forget it anytime soon. That my positivity and productivity could change his feeling was a huge eye opener to me.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.