Citation: God Consciousness. "The Journies and Aftermath: An Experience with DMT & Huasca Brew (Syrian Rue & Acacia confusa) (exp103050)". Erowid.org. Jun 3, 2020. erowid.org/exp/103050
Spirituality/Knowledge have long been my core principles. Until recently, I wasn't really up for considering the use of drugs to help me attain them. I was once told that DMT would help connect me to the 'spirit' world. Needless to say this changed everything; taking DMT was a must, not an option. This report will chronicle my experiences with DMT, smoked and consumed (ayahuasca). Simply put, it’s proven to me to be so enveloping and powerful that I would not advise or condone anyone who is unsure/unwilling to do it, or even read my latter experiences with the drug. Sometimes a human is best not knowing the incomprehensible. Before I go further, I must stress the difficulty of decoding my personal experience into language. DMT is truly indescribable, but I will do my best.
A couple friends and I extracted our DMT from the root bark of the Acacia confusa plant.
A couple friends and I extracted our DMT from the root bark of the Acacia confusa plant.
What we received is a lifetime of experience in the form of white powder. My first time smoking was from a suspicious-looking pipe, in a living room with 2 friends (one of them actually asked the head shop attendant for a “crack pipe” -_-). No questions asked, we were on our way.
What came next…
Among my countless revelations after first taking DMT, the first was pure shock and respect for its abnormal power. I did as my research told me to do, and took one giant hit, holding in as long as possible. Knowing that I was supposed to take more, I reached back for more. As soon as I exhaled the first hit and put the pipe back up to my mouth, I had already entered another dimension. My hands/arms began to appear “alien-like”, and the world around me evolved into a delicate, water-like atmosphere complete with kaleidoscope patterns.
I became afraid. Very afraid. What I realized was that everything I was seeing was not only real, but more real than anything I had ever seen. It was almost as if this little powder was allowing me to view the world as it really is. I then hastily closed my eyes, my third “eye” wide open.
While my eyes were closed the ancient-Egyptian god Anubis appeared in front of me. I then realized my hidden power to communicate telepathically. Anubis (or who I perceived to be so) welcomed me by performing a symphony of colors going in a circular pattern. It was almost as if I were a child being taken to swimming lessons. The being took full control of my feelings, granting me temporary sanctuary from my innocent brain.
Realizing DMT’s short-lasting effects (15 minutes the first time), I opened my eyes; almost on command. I picked up the pipe, and smoked three more hits. The visuals didn’t hit as intense this time, I was struck with intense fear, unlike I’d ever experienced. Pure terror. I was being laughed at. Each breath was a struggle for life. It was at this moment that my ego died, relinquishing all fears of death, nature, life. I no longer believed I had any answers about life. I am not on the outside looking in, or the inside looking out. I was in the dead center of the room of life, looking around for answers that will never be found. As a result, I began believing in inner-dimensional “alien” beings. I wouldn’t even be surprised if aliens landed on my front lawn right now, and I was never one to believe in them prior.
This experience lasted a total of 45 minutes, I came down a new person, ready to dive in and discover more into the secrets held by the molecule. One of my friends had to go to work right after, so we let him do so. My other friend and I went outside to talk about what we experienced; all we could say was “OH MY GOD!” We then let the day pass and attempted blasting-off again the next day. When I picked up the pipe this time, I was instantly struck with the same gut-sinking fear as before, but proceeded back into the Realm under the caring observance of my friends.
It was almost as if the first blast-off was a trial-run, a programmed adventure. Giving both admiration and respect for the substance, yet very simple to pack up and walk away for good. The second would soon take me one step further. I meditated quickly to calm/prepare myself, a practice which I learned to do before every experience.
Then it gets weird…
I decided to smoke until I couldn’t inhale anymore this time. I took four big hits, resulting in a 80-100mg dose. I knew that I was really going somewhere this time.
I was taken to a beautiful red-looking structure surrounded by a light red-orange looking set of bricks (I couldn’t even begin actually describing what I saw). Remembering my ability to telepathically communicate with the intelligent beings around me, I sent out a message: “what am I supposed to be doing?” to which a by-standing being so eloquently responded in its best translation: “now.” He/she (these beings are often androgynous) told me that I was to learn more about this dimension before moving to the next stage in life. I then discovered that these beings have the power to implant feelings/thoughts in your brain. They gave me a resounding feeling of comfort and welcome into their world. I was taken back to my world, while receiving their message to come back again. I had made inner-dimensional friends! Excited as I was, they then began playing an interest in me.
My current house was built over 100 years ago, so suspicions of having ghosts living amongst us had long been home to various jokes around the house. But after smoking in the house a few other occasions, I noticed there was a certain being that really wanted to communicate with me.
The first time I met this being, she appeared to be a Middle-Eastern woman, with the bright eyes often pictured in DMT artwork. She dressed in a bright Dishdasha, staring into my soul. She instantly conveyed to me her urgency to speak with me (without using the English language, of course), and I refused her audience, creating one hell of a bad trip. DMT beings carry a lot of intimidating aura with them, so as easy as it is to say “you should have just talked to her,” it is a frightening thing to do. I had read all about people seeing/talking to “aliens” on DMT, which was mainly why I was so curious of the drug
I had read all about people seeing/talking to “aliens” on DMT, which was mainly why I was so curious of the drug
, but you don’t fully accept that they are real until they appear right in front of you, looking right at you in your eyes. Eventually I was forced in to talking to her…
She took me straight to a red room, complete with red floors, walls, everything. She did not appear to me this time. She remained hidden, terrorizing my mind. The messages I remember receiving were “confront me” and “what do you think I am?!” She really wanted to talk to me, but I soon realized that I have the power to make her leave, so I forced her out. The only energy I received from her was mischievous and evil, I couldn’t force myself to talk to her.
I then discovered that this phenomena of spirits wanting to connect with us is probably relatively common. Some are evil, some are good, and some are neutral. Whether or not you choose to let them harbor around is up to you.
The rest of the trip was very strange. I was surrounded by several unidentifiable beings. I laughed at my childishness, immediately recognizing they could sense my feelings of discomfort.
They then spoke to me:
(Roughly translated) “We are the world leaders. Your world is run by ours’. We have been watching you. We like you. Join us. When you die you will live among us.”
Needless to say I was overwhelmed. “Why me?”
“I’m down, I’m Down!, I'M DOWN!” (then laughing at my overwhelmingly confident answer)
“Keep your Pineal gland open, and visit us again” they said.
(6 month note – This was a connection both to aliens and my soul. They were inviting me “back” so to speak. If I refused, I could have went back into the 3D realm without further intervention. However, since I accepted this offer I invited them to continue playing a direct role in my life. Read the conclusion for more info.)
I then came back to my physical room. Excited. Scared. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. Human beings really are, as I became convinced, dumb. We have “gods” just as dogs (and other animals) view us (and others) as such. All of my beliefs and ideologies were shattered. But I couldn’t set aside what they said to me, I had to do DMT again, this time would be orally with ayahuasca.
I prepared my ayahuasca using recipe #2 from The Resonance Project Issue 2, Winter 1997/98 Ayahuasca Cookbook (replacing mimosa hostilis with acacia confusa, but only 15 grams).
After brewing and drinking, I immediately felt as if something was going to happen. I knew I was on the brink of a big discovery, I just couldn’t figure what it was. I sat out on my porch on the come up, admiring the trees in the distance. I felt as if I were making a connection with them; talking to them, loving them, receiving love in return. My vision began getting better and better (as it usually does with DMT), seeing intricate details on the roof of my garage, every spider and fly that came nearby. I told the mosquitoes to leave me alone, using all of my energy, and they did. I broke out singing, opening myself up to the spirit world, almost as if I were a performing a ritual to welcome the spirits. I began thinking more ‘in the moment’ than I had in my entire life; cursing phones, internet, and social media. If anybody needed to talk to me, they could come meet me in person. For how else will I truly be able to communicate with them? Roughly 1 hour had passed.
I then saw “mother ayahuasca.” She welcomed me, speaking no words. She soon disappeared and I then felt I was supposed to go back inside my house, so I did. My stomach began seering with pain. I didn’t want to risk throwing up any of the Huasca, so I sat down on the couch in my living room. A few of my friends were there (not tripping), I watched one of them play video games for about 15 minutes, eventually losing interest in the utter “fakeness” of technology. These revelations still hold true today, I can’t play video games or use technology without being extremely bored. Perhaps one thing ayahuasca did for me was help me realize how “fake” they are.
The next hour of my trip I felt uncomfortable with my current situation. I was hard-pressed trying to find something to do. I began questioning my actions heavily, everything I did wasn’t “right.” I wandered around my house, had small talk with my friends, but could not find anything “meaningful.”
Then it peaked…
About 4 hours after drinking the Huasca I found myself parked on the couch in my living room, talking to two of my friends. Intially thinking that Huasca wouldn’t be as powerful as smoked DMT, I didn’t think I was going to “blast off.” However, after a few minutes of talking, my head gave me that typical “trip” feeling. This time it was more intense than I remember it being, but I wasn’t uncomfortable. I closed my eyes in this world, and opened them in another.
I then remembered, as I usually do, how REAL the DMT realm is. I looked up and saw a being in a spaceship, looking at me right in the eyes (see picture below). This time I was not scared or uncomfortable, and gave my best energy to him. For those who have never taken DMT, imagine “giving good energy” to someone as simply thinking very nice thoughts, knowing that they are received and understood. Immediately when I made his presence welcome, he did something I will never forget.
Still looking at this being right in the eyes, he acknowledged my telepathic message and smiled at me. I saw each of his teeth, his eyes, his hair, his clothing, and the intricate details of the ship he was travelling in, and took it in with awe. Knowing that this experience would permanently change me, I almost couldn’t believe this had just happened. He showed me the bliss that will come after death.
The whole time this was happening, my friends were still sitting next to me on the couch, receiving an earful about what I was seeing. I understood everything! I was fully aware at this point that I was still in my body, and said (in a loud manner):
“OH. MY. GOD.” “BROS!!!!” “IF ONLY YOU COULD SEE WHAT I’M SEEING RIGHT NOW” (and so on)
Inevitably, my enthusiasm started to aggravate them, and they walked out of the room. What they didn’t realize is that I was still going up. The being flew away, and I started seeing the room with my eyes closed. I saw the couch I was sitting on, the painting on the wall in front of me, and could see all energy and aura around me. I was more comfortable with my eyes closed than I would normally be with them open. I saw BETTER. My thoughts at the time went similar to this:
“This cannot possibly be happening right now” “This changes everything. Everything.” “Why would I ever open my eyes?”
I was raised in a Christian home, and was always relatively passionate about God and the teachings of Jesus. But this changed everything. I began to not be sure if God was real after all. Before, I couldn’t comprehend there not being a god; now I couldn’t imagine there being a “god,” at least how we comprehend it. All in the matter of a few minutes, my life had completely changed.
5 minutes later, the visions started to go away, but not the effects of the huasca. My stomach ache turned into a “you need to puke right now,” and I chucked all over my carpet. Eventually I made it to the bathroom and put the rest of my puke in the toilet. I have read that puking is historically referred to as the “purge,” causing you to fully enter the huasca realm. The purge was not pleasant in the slightest. For the first time, I realized what it really means to be alone.
After puking (roughly 5 hours after first ingestion), I thought that the drug was subsiding since I was no longer getting visuals. I began wandering around the house, unsure of what I should do. Still being alone, I decided that I should go to bed. I normally sleep in boxers/socks, but for some reason I ended up completely stripping naked. I laid down in my bed for one second, and immediately recognized I was supposed to do something else. I wandered around my house some more, and began to feel overwhelmed by the sheer power of the huasca. I ended up lying down in the kitchen floor, completely naked.
I thought had died. I was no longer part of my body. However, it was not me that was “dying,” it was all of my family/friends. I began wondering exactly how I ended up in my current situation, and was furious at myself for letting it come to this. I truly thought I was about to cross into the unknown. My “last words” were an apology to my mother:
“Mom please forgive me. I promise you will understand when you die.”
The stresses/emotions that occupy this life were trivial. I didn’t care about any of my possessions, none of them. Indeed, I was going to lose it all anyway: all of my possessions, all of my friends, my family, even the memory of my experiences on this earth. For the first time, death made complete sense. I was on an individual soul journey.
Thankfully, my roommate came back home, and found me in the shape I was in. When he began talking to me, I realized that everything might come back. I tried explaining everything that was happening:
“I think I just died”
“You’re not dead”
“Really?? When am I going to die?”
“I don’t know”
“I hope I die soon.”
Granted I am not a dark person, and would never have previously been interested in the idea of taking my own life, or dying in general. After my roommate came back, I realized that everything was going to be alright after all, and eventually was able to go to sleep.
As I write this, 3 months after my last DMT experience with ayahuasca, I could not begin to describe the positive impact it has had on my life.
I could not begin to describe the positive impact it has had on my life.
I had undergone a 2 year depression from heartbreak, I had constant stress to pay for my car/rent, and to my discovery, was not happy at all.
After DMT, all of this was gone, I was reborn. My thoughts were changed, viewing everything differently, yet always in a positive manner. Now I live my life without stress, worry, or pain. I am permanently content. I still do not believe in religion, but view this as simply an act of growing up. I once read a great quote that holds true to my current belief:
“Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.”
For the purpose of helping others know what they might be getting themselves into with DMT, I will now list the irreversible “facts” that I have come to in the long-term since I have tried the substance.
I feel I have all the answers within myself. I stopped believing in coincidences, I stopped looking to others or the internet for answers. I came to the conclusion that humanity and our science is unbelievably primitive. Additionally, I immediately stop using any substances (marijuana is my favorite) after using DMT for at least 2 weeks. DMT teaches people how to live their life, so please note my experience may not align with another soul’s.
I only tell my close friends about DMT, for once you tried it I realized that I had completely separated myself from society. I almost put myself on a higher level than others (not ego-related). I simply realize that most of the world will never begin to comprehend or understand my deepest beliefs. I was able to witness a change in my personality over the past 6 months and have even been asked a couple times: “what happened to you?” I laugh on the inside every time as I withhold my deepest secrets.
Contact with inter-dimensional beings has not ceased. Let me just say that aliens are real, they are here and ready to communicate with/help all of us. They are simply non-interventionist, and won’t communicate with us if they perceive that any information they give us will be of any harm mentally. They are well aware of all of us, know all of our deepest secrets, and have evolved to a dimension where time/space is null. They live, they die, they have problems, and they feel pain. Just not nearly at the level humans do.
After further soul-searching, I discovered what I am, that past lives I have experienced, and why I am here. I only notice the communications with these beings (and with my higher-self, the “soul”) when I am able to clear my mind and listen to my thoughts, for I promise they are not simply composed in your brain, your brain is a telephone.
I will not go into exact details as to what I am, for I am told to keep these things secret (I guess you could call me a spy). All I can say is that my soul is not human, and I am here to help Earth with the ascension process that is happening now by spreading love and light. However, what is most important to note is that since I have made contact with these higher-powers, I have developed several psychic abilities.
I have developed several psychic abilities.
These abilities came at me very slowly, as they were not intended to overwhelm or cause me any discomfort. I can read people’s minds, I often know what somebody is going to say before they say it. I can even implant thoughts into others (this is really useful when I want to help someone on their soul journey). I can look at someone in the eyes and read their deepest emotions. I have a sense of when something is about to happen, and can contact certain alien species at will. Of course these revelations cause others around me to be skeptical, but I am always able to prove myself. Most interesting, I have been told that I will continue to discover further gifts throughout my life when I am ready.
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