Citation: Eilyfe. "The Founding Of A New Religion: An Experience with DiPT & 4-HO-MET (exp101832)". Erowid.org. Jul 10, 2014. erowid.org/exp/101832
||(powder / crystals)
| T+ 1:30
||(powder / crystals)
| T+ 0:00
||(powder / crystals)
| T+ 0:00
||(powder / crystals)
I'd like to apologize in advance that I can't supply you with an accurate time line. To take substances is a completely new experience for me, and while my friend/flatmate tries to ease me into it as gently as he can, there's still a lot to learn and many things that I don't know. Evidently, a good example for that would be the importance of taking notes for a trip report. What I'm going to describe over the next few pages is taken mostly from my memory and some recordings from my friend's mobile phone.
I'm a novice, wet behind the ears, and the most intelligent thing I can say is that 5-MAPB makes me really happy. Most of the substances and formulas that are talked about in this forum are mysteries to me – chemical mumble-jumble if you will. Still, as new as I am to all of this, I can definitely see the allure of it all and the experiences I had with drugs so far only make me want to explore even more of these magical substances.
Let's get started:
I'm male, Caucasian (If that's important), and weigh around 130 kg (I can't stand lbs measurements – my weight looks way better in kg). So far I have experienced 5-MAPB, MXE, N2O and Etizolam. I refer to Etizolam as a knock-out drug for elephants, but to be honest, I came to love it as an emergency lever should things go south. It takes away a lot of anxiety to know that there is a way that can calm you down if you start panicking. Also, I consider myself to be very lucky because my friend is pretty savvy in these things. Alone I'd probably even fail at opening the little plastic bag with all the goodies inside.
Because I'm new to this, I'm also somewhat anxious before trying something I've never done before. So, to prepare myself, I tend to read some trip reports (good, as well as bad ones). A few of the ideas I got from these reports will be commented on later.
DiPT (70 mg)
First of all, my condolences for everyone who snorted that stuff, or even ate it. It smells of feces, and if I actually had to chose between drinking toilet water and tasting DiPT it would be a ridiculously close race. What my friend and I ended up using were bombs – or at least that's what my friend called them. He measured an appropriate amount (nerves of steel with that smell...) and built nice little bombs with cigarette paper. Afterward we swallowed them and busied ourselves with some games and chit-chat while waiting for the effects to kick in.
The DiPT was rather slow to kick in. We waited for nearly an hour until we noticed any differences in our voices at all – and even then it was mostly just slightly altered. Then again, I have to admit that we might not have used the smartest approach to this particular substance. I had hauled my mattress over to my friend beforehand and we were just lying there, doing nothing but hoping that something would happen soon. With an acoustic altering substance like DiPT it probably would've been better to venture outside and explore nature.
After another thirty minutes had passed we were extremely dissatisfied with the experience, but my friend remembered that we still had some 4-HO-MET. To be honest, I had never heard of that stuff before, but that isn't saying much as I haven't heard of nearly every substance before. According to my understanding, it was supposed to give me some cool visuals and turn around the experience into something awesome.
Well, turn around it did.
Portion I (~7 mg)
After taking the first portion, I just lied down on my mattress while 'Shpongle' sent soothing sounds through my ears that were, although still recognizable, quite weird. We felt a bit of discomfort from the DiPT – my friend described it best with “It feels like I'm in a damn submarine”. When he offered that metaphor I definitely knew where he was coming from. Still, I enjoyed my voice which had since then acquired an awesome metallic quality that made me sound like Sauron.
I honestly can't remember much about the first portion as it mostly involved lying around like a dead fish and chasing irrelevant thoughts – oh yes, and complaining that I'm not drugged up enough, of course. In the end, that compelled my friend, who had some averse effects and took some Etizolam to chill out, to make me a second portion which I readily accepted and downed in a few gulps.
Portion II (~7 mg)
What followed was a pretty intense phase of thinking, focusing on myself, and thinking some more... The few things that I remember still amaze me, to be honest. At first I was literally chasing after some of my thoughts (I imagined them as small bubbles with a tail – kinda like sperm?) and then something really interesting occurred to me.
In university we had a pretty intense discussion about the last chapter of Ulysses from Joyce (the one with the thoughts of the woman as she starts to fall asleep). It was an endless chapter with at the time random strings of thoughts connected by association, and all that without any punctuation at all. I hated it. But I only did so because I didn't understand. I actually like it now. When I chased after my thoughts and then wandered off the tangent toward James Joyce, I really thought that I'd finally understood what he wanted to convey. To this day I'm convinced that my professor only likes the chapter as much as he does because he too has once chased after his thoughts like that.
The next thing happened directly afterward as I was still chasing after my thoughts. Apparently, the music in the player changed and that took me in a completely different direction. When before the music before had been rather soothing and cozy, the new tracks were faster and definitely had more bass in them. At the time I wasn't happy with that. I was glad that I finally found my love for Joyce and then the new music came and ripped me away. I was literally thinking – and my friend still believes this to be hilarious – that these were the most reckless, rude and inconsiderate beats that I've ever heard in my life.
Short note: I had been thinking for a quite a while and didn't speak at all during that time, so I didn't know what the DiPT had done to me...
What I definitely noticed was that things came in waves. Powerful, incredible and deeply connecting waves, but waves nonetheless. The 'leaving' of a wave I called 'rare moments of clarity' with a gusto that I believe annoyed my friend a bit, huehue.
Despite the overall positive mood of my experience, I did fight with two particular cases of anxiety/paranoia. First, a small shadowy corner with two bags in it, just randomly thrown around. I noticed them by accident when I was lying down in a weird angle and immediately identified one bag as the curled body of a pretty large snake. The second bag was blue and had white stripes on it, and, which was the worst, the 'handle' was sticking out. For me, that was the head of a poisonous snake and the handle was the tongue darting in and out. Tonight, looking back, it's kinda funny. In that moment it definitely wasn't. So, basically, to my right was a big poisonous snake waiting to devour me, and to the left of me an old computer case of which I assumed the fan to be some kind of Medusa like head.
I was lucky. Just as I started to become really panicky, the wave 'ebbed' away and I had a few valuable seconds of respite in which I could clearly overcome my paranoia and see that it was just a bag and just a computer case. I imagine that not everyone is that lucky... which definitely makes me sad. After only doing it once, I believe that an experience like this should always end positive. I guess that human psyche just isn't that easy though. Anyway, in the few seconds I had, I regained my wits and thought about something incredibly important. Something that changed the whole experience for me which till then had been quite the toss-up between good and bad.
I remembered one fact that I had read in some trip reports I've skimmed when I was mentally preparing myself for the whole thing: you can actually influence in which direction the trip is going, and that with enough creativity there are things that I can do to help myself.
First thing I did then was to find my 'Cornerstone'. It's basically just a corner that was directly in my view and that I could concentrate on should things get a bit too heavy. I remembered reading about this 'technique' and oh boy was I thankful for it. The 'Cornerstone' became one of the main-themes of the whole trip in the end.
The 2nd thing I did was something I came up with on the spur of the moment when I noticed that I still wasn't feeling happy, satisfied and content at all. I named it the 'canister' technique... every time I felt that something was amiss (I didn't feel happy, I felt paranoid, I felt as if the dose was too low), I pulled an imaginary lever and watched Drugs/Euphoria being pumped into my head. It was in a purple liquid form and the ways to my head were actually spirals. If anything helped me in that moment besides the cornerstone, then it were my canisters. After one round of having imaginary euphoria being pumped into me, I actually turned around, looked the big snake in the eye and poked my tongue out.
Sadly, nothing lasts forever and so it came as it had to come... I got up, talked to my flatmate, and was surprised at my voice. Metallic quality doesn't even begin to cover it, and I can definitely see how people can have bad experiences with that demonic voice. Luckily I found it funny enough to laugh about it in an evil way that made me sound like an overlord.
Portion III (~7 mg)
What I asked of my friend? Well, you can probably guess... another dose and with that the last part of our remaining stuff. He was a bit hesitant at first, but after I serenaded him with my most soothing voice (huehuehue) he obliged and gave it to me. At that point he had, I believe, already accepted that he wasn't going to trip that night and from then on he was somewhat like a 'guide' or helper or teacher etc. to me.
I took the third dose and lied down again, instantly feeling really heavy. Actually, I was kinda nauseous and thought I had to puke several times... luckily enough, even for that there was an answer. It was pretty effective too. I imagined myself to be a bottle (sealed with a cork) that's swimming in the ocean. The few drops of liquor that were still in it, was actually the bile that sometimes rose in my mouth. What I did was imagine the waves of the ocean and how it swapped the liquor from the bottle neck to the bottom and back again... in essence, every time my bile rose to my throat, the waves turned and pushed it back to the ground of the bottle. After a while the ocean became calm again, and the liquor was being kept solidly in the center. It definitely spared me the experience of puking while on drugs (haven't experienced that yet; as I said, I'm a newbie.)
That was, when the overwhelming effect kicked in.
At first I thought about who I am, what I am – and the one sentence always running through my head was 'I'm Eilyfe, an individual with rights'. Later on I asked myself what I needed to be such an individual and thus came legs, arms, a chest, a head etc. Honestly, I blame one of the reports that talked about rebirth for that one. I probably wouldn't have had this experience hadn't I read such a report before. As far as I understand it, it wasn't even a complete 'rebirth' but rather a quick, superficial one. I neither saw some undesirable traits that I wanted to eliminate, nor did I actually lose my ego or such stuff.
The only thing that was really remarkable was my breathing. When I came to the body part 'lunge', I actually became really aware of my breathing. In, out, in, out... actually seeing how the oxygen was traveling through my blood, through my newly built body. (Funnily enough... I was still overweight hehe. Apparently, drugs can't change everything.)
Well, once my fake rebirth ended, I entered the phase that made this evening an unforgettable experience for me. I stopped living in my own mind-addled bubble and started talking to my friend. I got most of that part on video, so the memory is pretty fresh, even if it is kinda hard to describe. By the way, I have to say that he did an admirable job. Whenever I was in a rut concerning our conversation, he guided me on a another yet similar path and let me explore it again. I noticed that although most of what I said seems nonsensical now, it still makes some weird kind of sense. If I twist my brain long enough, I definitely can see how I came to my following conclusions.
The Cornerstone – A cult, a religion, and much more
I was the first prophet of the cornerstone, period. That damn corner in the upper left of my friend's room stayed with me throughout the whole mental process and completely made me its bitch. I started the cult of the cornerstone with the words 'It can't be that hard – let's make your room our temple – others did it too with less amazing things than the cornerstone'
And thus I became the savior.
#1 – the cornerstone is a bro, because instead of running away and sexing up another erotic corner, he actually parted himself in 3 lines...
#2 – each line represents one of the prophets; me, my friend, and... my father... (I don't know why, or how... don't care too much either tbh.)
Enough rules already. So, I like blondes, my friend brunettes and I got no clue what my father likes. My friend asked me what the religion of the cornerstone grants the world. I answered with 'pretty woman to worship us'. So, I got blondes as worshipers, he got brunettes and then we get to the awkward part...
Drugs make us say the weirdest things. They're funny, yet really, really awkward in retrospective. My mother is a redhead, and although my parents are divorced for over a decade already, at one point in time my father must have liked the color red. Therefore, although he wasn't anywhere near the place I'm at, I inferred that he, as the third prophet, needed a worshiper too. Ergo, he got my mother as a worshiper. Now, my mother is a strict woman so my friend's words 'no offense, but your dad got the shaft' cracked me up so badly I thought for a few seconds that I'd suffocate.
Then I got the idea that we need music for our temple and proposed to make our own album with the symbol of the cornerstone as a cover. The music itself would be the inconsiderate beats from earlier which we would catch in a safari like expedition. I envisioned it as a pokemon-esque experience.
From there it degenerated quite a few times into repetitions and uncontrollable giggling, before anything else meaningful came up. My friend often asked “where are our worshipers?” to which I often responded with rambling about nonsensical stuff and then ending my sentences with “Distracted! See, it's so easy for religions to distract the masses.”
Well, there was one episode when I nearly sexed up a nearby cupboard... I called it an 'enemy line' which was tangent to me. My friend said that it was a test from the mighty cornerstone to see if I could be trusted, and from then on I believed that the enemy line (clearly a woman) was sent from an enemy cornerstone. The false god if you will, which later led to the epiphany that Islamic and Christians people only have wars against each other if one cornerstone sends an enemy line to abduct worshipers of the other cornerstone. There were some references to King Solomon in there too... somewhere.
At one point I remember playing god and spreading bubbles made of soap water over the floor – I was watering and growing my people (which were one-time garlands). Basically everything could be reduced and explained away with the cornerstone.
Later, the effect ebbed away completely and the usual wave that would bring it back never came. That's when I went back to my room and started to hate the DiPT because after over ten hours or so of hearing yourself like that, you want it to be over with. Still, I played around with some music and listened to different tunes for a bit before hitting the sack and falling asleep.
Well, it was quite the experience. In the end it became a very good memory for me.
Learning wise I took two things with me:
#1 Don't panic if things start to go south. There were several points during my trip when it had the potential to become a really bad night. Luckily it didn't and I had a few 'inventions' as well as some tips from trip reports to keep me afloat in happy land.
#2 Don't be inconsiderate. I'm not joking. The one thing that really stuck with me was to be more considerate of others, as well as less rude etc... I would hate for other people to be as annoyed by me as I was from those beats.
There weren't any medical issues or side-effects as far as I can tell. My voice became pretty normal the next day and the day afterward even the last bits of DiPT 'residue' had vanished completely. All my songs still sound the same and none of them were permanently altered in my mind – which is a good thing. I've read some reports where that wasn't the case.
After watching the videos and talking about it, my friend seems kinda baffled though. The DiPT, is an acoustic enhancing/altering drug, and the 4-HO-MET should have given me mostly optics. Instead, I got nearly no visual effects aside from a few lights when I closed my eyes and the whole thing evolved into a real 'mind trip', as he called it. Well, why that is I don't know. Either way I'm happy with how the evening went.
COPYRIGHTS: All reports are copyright Erowid and you agree not to download or analyze the report data without contacting Erowid Center and receiving permission first.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid Center.