Citation: TheAmazingAnnika. "Very Lucid in Most Ways: An Experience with Methoxetamine (exp101528)". Erowid.org. May 24, 2016. erowid.org/exp/101528
I am fairly new at any drug use and mostly have a brief few months where I was using meth a couple times a week. I have never had a dissociative before but a friend was determined to cheer me up while I go through the break up of my marriage due to the meth and a friend named G.Y. So he sent me a gram of MXE to try out and to make a trip report on.
1:00a - Dosed 10mg at suggestion of a friend. I am chatting in IRC and TinyChat on cam and feeling really excited to do a new drug. I have another 10mg lined up for possible redose later.
1:05a - Starting to feel time slow down a bit and music sounds a bit wonky. I can hear the sounds of the music striking my ears at different times.
1:15a - Dosed the other 10mg rail.
1:20 - Feeling more disconnected from things. This has a very good drip, strong and harsh tasting. I almost feel the front of my brain slowly pulling away from the rest of it now. Starting to feel dizzy in place but good.
1:25a - Body definitely is disconnecting more and I'm feeling high. The pitch in music is moving around and it feels like I'm hearing things in stereo out of different ears.
1:30a - Wow...Walking is very hard. Very, very dizzy and I can tell my senses aren't lining up. Cannot tell if what I am hearing is on pitch or not. XXYYXX is perfect! So wonderfully numb and my mouth and tongue are numb. Generally feeling my body is fuzzy. I'm on cam on TinyChat and I think my face looks really off. It looks wider than I remember.
1:34a - Upset stomach but not bad. Pretty good feeling overall. I am still lucid and haven't had any hallucinations.
1:38a - Feeling very numb behind my eyes. Still feel like the front of my brain is moving slowly away, kind of drifting like ice on the water. My mind is starting to feel like I can carry on many conversations quickly and put them on pause just to pick them up when it's convenient.
1:45a - Time is moving at a very strange pace, slowing down then speeding up but I still caught everything that had happened. This chemical taste is similar to meth but stronger. Mostly I am still typing well and not having issues with my hands. I think I am keeping up ok in chat and don't appear too out of things. I have several conversations going on with others and I'm lucid enough to contribute.
2:00a - Feelings of rocking along with music. When the songs stop, I find myself rocking in rhythm to the fan. Some numbness wearing off but my ears and face still feel very numb. It's been an hour since my first dose and I feel that music is more coming at me than me simply listening to it. I am getting the distinct notion it is bypassing the front of my mind and hitting me somewhere behind that. I really love 'Metals' by XXYYXX. Holy fuck.
2:30a - Came back from a smoke break. Had so many thoughts about G.Y. The many nights of sitting on his dad's truck bed and watching the sky. He always loved the stars. I loved the clouds. I remember thinking when we were high that I could shift them and move them in my mind. Mostly I think about his lips. The rare occasions that he would kiss me. I could feel the way he would hold me, the way his voice sounded when we fucked. It was like watching a movie that you had seen a million times and wanted to watch just once more.
3:12a - REDOSE another 20mg.
3:23a - Feeling very different. I'm tasting a ton of metal in my mouth and feeling numbness in most parts of my body.
3:42a - Very out of my body. I feel my clothing on my body and its texture is very different. It feels so much softer than normal.
4:00a - Stomach is still upset but I feel ok. No nausea. Put on my own play list to listen to. I am sensing that my ears are lower on my head than they actually are. Music sounds so strange to my ears since they feel lower. The sounds almost feel like they are scooped up by my ears like catcher's mitts and then brought up higher. I'm listening to the Across the Universe soundtrack.
4:45a - Went for a last cigarette. I watched the clouds and the trees moving around, could see a thickness to the air and depth perception is fucked. Continued to have thoughts about my time with G.Y. In my thoughts, I wondered if he were somewhere doing drugs as well. If he knew what he had done to my life. What I had done to it myself. If he missed me. If I really missed him or just the idea of him. I savored the memories and tried hard to hold on to them. I thought that maybe I would be able to remember more on MXE than when I thought about things normally. In my mind, I felt like the MXE was a key to get into my meth-soaked memories of him. My clothes still feel so soft on my skin and I started to think they were the only thing I ever wanted to wear. I remember thinking that cotton is fabric made by gods. Although I know it was close to 85 degrees outside and I was wearing long sleeves, fleece pants and socks I was quite cool and comfortable.
5:10a - Laid down in bed. I am oddly floating and yet weighed down. I am trying to sleep but only having lots of CEV with the music. The visuals change and shift as I anticipate the next part of a song. Lots of faces that meld and move but no colors. Only shades of black, white and grey.
6:45a - I am still awake but feeling pleasant. My ex just woke up and I heard his alarm clock going off. I am going to make a real effort to get some sleep.
11:00a - Woke up feeling really fine. Had quite a bit of energy considering I had so little sleep.
All in all, I really liked this trip. Will try a stronger dose (40mg) most likely at once rather than the spacing I took the doses at tonight. My experience was like being drunk without all the ugliness of being drunk. I felt so much dizziness but also self-conscious about how I looked. I remember thinking my face was foreign and my features looked wrong in the cam. My memories were mostly pleasant and things that should have made me sad didn't. They were just memories I was able to call up and ponder. Very lucid in most ways and able to control my fingers and type. I had several times through the night I felt like my head was far too heavy to keep up like I was sleepy but without feeling the need for sleep. Just laying in on my hands for a bit helped a lot.
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