Citation: Incepted. "Transformative and Amazing: An Experience with Mushrooms (exp100217)". Erowid.org. Jul 17, 2020. erowid.org/exp/100217
This Gal's First Shroom Trip - AMAZING
I was depressed (borderline suicidal) and had PTSD that no counseling or prescriptions had alleviated. It had been a long time. I was honestly considering just crashing my car somewhere when a friend/dealer/roommate suggested shrooms to me (she had a whole jar full and wanted a trip buddy). I said 'Sure, why not?', knowing full well from various sites that you're not supposed to partake of them with preexisting psychological problems.
(6:00 PM) I only took about 2.0 grams (a little over half an 1/8) and discovered that I also was very sensitive to them. I ground the 2.0 grams of dried mushrooms up and mixed them with a drink and downed the whole drink at once (6:00 pm) and then waited for the visuals. I never got nauseated or anything, but my skin was little cold.
(6:30 PM) It started just with seeing halos of light around the ceiling lights, and within the hour I was fully tripping out.
(6:45 PM) For the first time in a decade I felt truly happy. Everything was okay, my worries were still there but I was free of them. I felt like a bird stretching it's wings, like instead of being a fuck-up I could do anything. I suppose this was the euphoria.
It was, in a few words, transformative and amazing.
I understood all of my problems and was able to discard them, and I felt clear-headed about the world for the first time in my life.
I felt clear-headed about the world for the first time in my life.
(7:00 PM) I saw mild hallucinations as well as the normal patterns (patterns forming people looming over me, eight feet tall made out of matrix-like blue shimmery code, but I wasn't scared because I knew they weren't malicious. I tried talking to them but they loomed and almost invisibly drifted about the apartment). This may be that I have always had an active imagination and vivid dreams and was seeing things inside the normal shroom visuals. My roomie was a little annoyed at how strong my trip was compared to her 'normal' one.
The walls and the ceiling were breathing but if I made myself focus on them they turned into rolling dunes of sand and I would lose time watching a desert landscape shifting like on fast-forward.
(7:30 PM) I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror (again against advice, I know!) and there were black patterns on my face like tattoos and white, delicate lace writhing up and down my legs and arms and chest. It was beautiful.
The bathroom curtain patterns turned into people trapped in the black swirls, tiny naked faceless bodies reaching out for me in supplication like an old renaissance facade of Hell. I'll tell you again that none of this was scary, it was happy and amazing. My roommate had taken the same amount of the same batch and only saw basic shroom visuals.
(7:40 PM) I took a bubble bath because it sounded amazing and lost time watching the bubbles swirl and slither up my arms and legs and breasts. None of this was scary, I was grinning the whole time (damn you, sci fi novels!).
(8:30 PM) I got out some fabric paint (we had a sheet hung up on the wall as a sort of group art project) and went to work, and the paint began melting and swirling around my fingers exactly like that scene in 'The Pagemaster' It was so incredibly cool. It melted in the directions of my brush strokes like it was alive.
(9:00 PM) As I was winding down I just lounged naked (lace patterns on my skin!) in my computer chair, watching a dandelion dance on my screensaver. I glanced up and thought about trying to focus beyond the walls, maybe exert more control over the visuals rather than get lost in them.
After a few tries, the walls shifted and became slightly transparent. I glanced up and there was a transparent dark vine/tentacle thing wrapped thickly around my ceiling fan and hanging down, swaying. In the distance, through the walls I could see hulking tentacle creatures reaching up to the sky, all made of advanced machinery and coexisting with life outside. It was all very 'War of the Worlds' or something.
(10:40 PM) I hoped the vision wouldn't fade but eventually it did and I was left with a few basic patterns before I eventually fell asleep at the end of the trip. I woke up the next morning feeling well-rested with no negative effects.
Overall it was an extremely positive experience for me, doubly so for where I was mentally at that time. I just remembered repeatedly thinking about how beautiful the world was :D
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