Citation: Astro. "Descent to Madness: experience with Ayahuasca (Syrian Rue & Mimosa hostilis) (ID 65572)". Erowid.org. Oct 5, 2007. erowid.org/exp/65572
Background and Preparation: My girlfriend had never been particularly open to the idea of trying Ayahuasca, but yesterday afternoon, while we were both at home, she told me that she was tired of just smoking marijuana and wanted to try something different. Using real names online can be risky so for all practical purposes I will call my girlfriend Allison. I suggested several alternatives for her to try, one of them being Ayahuasca tea. She agreed that it sounded good, and we decided that we would both drink the tea after our class that evening. Both of us wrote down everything that we had eaten over the past couple of days to make sure that it was safe to take the drink.
I had taken DMT several times before, but I had always been alone so I was looking forward to trying it with another person present. I had a hard time concentrating in class because I was so excited about the night that was ahead of me. As soon as I got home, I began preparing the tea with my usual recipe. The dosage I describe here is a preparation for two drinkers. I normally would only use half of the listed ingredients to brew a tea for myself only.
The procedure I used is as follows:
- 4 cups of water
- Ĺ cup lime juice
- 6g Syrian Rue
- 16g Mimosa hostilis
I put half the water (2 cups) into one pot, and the other half into another, and I did the same with the lime juice (1/4 cup per pot). I brought both pots to a boil on the stovetop and then turned down the heat so that the tea was barely simmering. I then added the Syrian Rue to one of the pots and the Mimosa hostilis to the other. They simmered for half an hour before I pulled them off the stove. After combining the liquids, I used my French press to filter and pour the tea, but a strainer would have worked just fine also. We divided the tea equally into two glasses, and at about 10:30PM we began to drink.
+ 0:00: The tea seems more bitter than normal. We sit in silence as we both try to choke it down. My throat burns from the acidity of the beverage. It has been several months since Iíve tripped, and even longer since Iíve consumed anything acidic like this.
+ 0:15 My girlfriend asks me how long it usually takes for the effects of intoxication to take place, and I tell her that it usually hits me about half an hour after I begin drinking. I explain how I usually have to vomit from sheer nausea. Shortly after the regurgitation my trip usually takes off quickly. I find it strange that I am not feeling queasy at all so I finish the rest of my drink quickly. Iíve read various reports that say vomiting seems to catalyze the entry into the trip.
+ 0:30: I still donít feel anything along the lines of tripping. I am getting nauseous now though and I go to the bathroom to kneel over the toilet. After a couple minutes, however, the nausea subsides and I go back to the couch to sit with my girlfriend.
+ 0:45 Still nothing for me or my girlfriend. I suggest that we brew more tea. I had never combined the two solutions of Syrian Rue and Mimosa hostilis before so I figured that maybe the MAOI had not had time to take effect before the DMT was metabolized. I get up to go brew more Mimosa without the Syrian Rue because I am certain we donít need anymore of that. I use the same bark that I used the first time around knowing that it will still probably have plenty of DMT in it. This time I am impatient and I pour the tea after only ten minutes. My girlfriend and I resume drinking.
+ 1:00 We both finish our tea quickly this time. Without the Syrian rue the taste is much less bitter. Right now itís as though I can feel my blood flowing in my body. I address this with my girlfriend and she says that she can feel the same thing. She gets up to use the bathroom and I recline on the couch. I am becoming frustrated that there are no visuals. It has never taken this long for a trip to really set in. I get up to go turn on some music thinking that maybe that will help my trip along.
+ 1:30 I am listening to the music when it occurs to me that Allison is still in the bathroom. She doesnít like to throw up in front of people so I decide to give her five more minutes before checking on her in case that is what she is doing. Looking over at the bathroom beyond the kitchen I see the walls start to pulse. There is an energy radiating from the kitchen and it feels like I can see every color of the rainbow draped over everything in the room simultaneously. The trip is coming on now and I realize that we probably drank too much. I get up to go check on Allison. As I raise my fist to knock on the door it opens and she comes out without saying a word. She simply returns to the couch and reclines, stating that she is definitely starting to trip. I return to the couch with her and sit on the other end. I have a strange desire to distance myself from her and she seems to be experiencing the same thing. Normally she would want me sitting right next to her with my arm around her, but tonight she didnít seem to care in the least bit that I was practically ignoring her. I cover myself with a blanket and recline once more.
+ 1:45 The room is becoming highly distorted. It reminds me of a TV show where certain things have been electronically scrambled so that viewers wonít be able to see what is there. The music feels like it is infecting my body now. Waves of energy come with each beat and I canít help but move around. The colors that the song is producing whirl around me and I am all of a sudden unable to distinguish where the music is coming from. Realizing that my eyes have been closed I open them to look around. I canít see anything beyond the coffee table in front of the couch. I am no longer alive but rather simply existing. I try to define my own consciousness and I realize that there is very little of it. There are no objects anymore for me to be conscious about. I can see the universe vividly and all of its inner workings. Molecules pop out at me from a poster I have on the wall and I feel as though I have been engulfed in Atoms. A wave of warmth and happiness swarms through me and I burst into laughter. I laugh for what seems like an eternity.
+ 1:50 It feels like I have been tripping for hours and I will myself to sit up and check the clock on my cell phone since I canít see the clock across the room. It has only been about eight minutes since I last checked the clock and I am thrilled at the news that I still have hours of tripping left to do. As I look over at Allison she quickly hides herself under her own blanket as though she does not want to be seen by me. As I lay back down she kicks up a pillow to put a barrier between the two of us. Before there is time to contemplate the meaning of this, however, I am again swallowed by the trip. The music is becoming less upbeat and I feel like it needs to stop playing. I think about getting up to go turn it off but it seizes control of my body once more and before I know it I am dancing: just lying there moving with the music.
The dance becomes more and more violent. I feel as though every bit of my consciousness is being poured into these movements. Energy is about ready to burst from my gut and the dance becomes so violent that I fear I am having a seizure. Like a hot heavy blanket the fear presses against my breast. I draw several deep breaths and attempt to assess my situation. I determine that I am not in fact having a seizure but I am still unable to control my movement. My jaw begins to chatter fiercely. I have a vision of a slice of pizza and I recognize it as the pizza that I ate for breakfast. Had I taken this pizza into account when I thought through my meals? Was there a lot of tyramine in my system after all?
[Erowid Note: The author reports eating tyramine-containing food within 24 hours after ingesting a reversible MAOI. Such a combination could carry serious health consequences. See the MAOI Vault for more information.]
The answer comes to me in the form of several noises that sound a great deal like a synthesizer. I have not brushed my teeth all day. The pepperoni is still in my mouth. The decaying protein is flushing my mouth with tyramine and I know immediately that my jaw is in hypertension. Bringing myself back to Earth long enough to get up, I spring from the couch and run to the bathroom where I fill my mouth with mouthwash and start to swish. The trip comes back strong as I do this and I forget that there is liquid in my mouth. My jaw falls open and it leeks all over me. I stagger to the couch where I fall face down onto the cushions. What time is it? This madness has to have been going on for days. I begin to wonder if maybe I have gone insane. I feel a thousand other people around me. I am talking to them and they are talking back. With all my energy I reach for my phone to check the time.
+ 2:45 It is 1:12 in the morning and I am extremely thirsty. I get up to get a drink and Allison asks where I am going. I had almost forgotten that she was there. I try to form words but all that comes out is ďdrink.Ē I meander over to the sink where I get a cup and fill it with water. Once again I am unable to contain my liquid and half of it spills over the front of my shirt. I had hoped the water would bring me down to earth a little but I am still trapped in this divine and confusing world. I am scared. It is not a bad trip. Somehow I am still happy, but I am frustrated with my current condition. As I lay back down I feel a sense of absolute loneliness. I wanted someone, it didnít matter who, to talk to. All of the other people that were in the room with me have vanished. I wanted to cry.
In desperation I sit up and look over the barrier that Allison put in place. She hides under her blanket again. For several minutes I sit trying to contemplate the formation of words. I need to speak with her, itís urgent. I ask her if she is tired of this. She doesnít seem to understand my question so I attempt to rephrase it. Her pupils take up the majority of her eyes and I can tell that she is trying hard to get her feet on solid ground. She agrees that she is tired of the trip. I confide in her that I really think we drank too much and that I am afraid, but talking to her seems to be lightening the mood a little.
I ask her if I can come closer to her and she declines. She says she is not ready for touch yet. We sit in silence for a few minutes before reengaging in conversation. It is not long before Allison beckons me to go sit with her. She is ready for more human interaction. Still very shaky on my feet, I stumble over to where she is sitting. We try to kiss and both agree that we donít like it right now. Allison suggests that we watch a funny movie to calm our nerves a little bit. I agree and I go to burn a DVD of a movie I have on my computer.
+ 3: 15 In the bedroom it feels quiet. I am curious about how aroma would incorporate itself into the trip so I light some incense and then try to operate the computer. For a few moments I am convinced that my computer is broken before I realize that it has simply frozen and I hit the reset button. All of a sudden a blanket of anxiety falls over me. The computer is taking too long to start up. What if it never does? I canít wait any longer, I just canít. In a frenzy I begin to pace back and forth. I enter a box of utter confusion. There seems to be floor both above and below me. It is white with black squiggly stripes, yet there is some sort of orange hue about it. I open my eyes and realize that this box I am in has been a result of my eyes being closed.
I turn back to the computer and it is ready to be used. It takes me a couple minutes to locate the mouse on the screen but once I focus on it I am able to keep track of it. After an intense session of concentration I have started the burn process and I return to the living room to sit with Allison until it is finished. She seems glad that Iím back and we sit talking for a little while about our experience and what weíve been feeling. I try to explain the confusion that I felt about my computer but she seems uninterested.
+ 3:30 I remember the movie and I go back to the bedroom to see if it is done copying. As I approach the bedroom I am determined to stay focused and not lose my head. Unfortunately when I get there the screen is displaying a message that says ďBurn complete,Ē but the status bar only says 57%. Once again I start pacing only this time I am pacing in a triangle. Its as though I canít figure out what to do next. The computer has just told me two different things and they canít both be true. I pace faster and faster attempting to make sense of it all. Eventually I give up and return to Allison in the living room. She seems happy when I donít return with the movie. We are both feeling good enough now that neither of us really needs something funny to watch anyway. I feel tired now. Not really sleepy, just physically exhausted. I am pleasantly relieved, yet somewhat shocked, when Allison suggests that I take a shower. She says for some reason she feels like I should take a shower, that it will somehow cleanse us both and make us happier. I agree because a shower sounds like an extremely farfetched concept right now and I am curious.
+ 4:00 We get up and go to the bathroom where she takes a seat on the floor against the wall. I turn on the water and wait for it to warm up, taking a seat on the toilet lid in the meantime. It occurs to me how long and complex of a process this is going to be. I have to get undressed first which seems like an alien concept at this point. And once Iíve done that I have to get into the shower and perform all sorts of complicated scrubbing movements. I tilt my head back and close my eyes. I hear deep laughter from far away, and a wave of warmth sweeps over me. Taking advantage of the warmth, I get undressed quickly and open the shower curtain.
I am completely overwhelmed by the sight behind the curtain. The faucet is dripping, the water is flowing down the drain, and the droplets are pattering against the floor. It is warm in front of me and cold behind me. The sensory imagery is overpowering. I become instantly confused. I try to move toward the shower and Allison points out that instead of getting in on the side clear of obstacles, I had chosen to go the route where the toilet blocked the entrance to the shower. I stumble and practically fall in. I shampoo my hair but I am compelled not to soap. The soap seems to be speaking to me and for a few seconds I am convinced that all of the people I had felt the presence of earlier were mysteriously trapped in the bar of soap. Allison pokes her head in and tells me that Iíve been standing still for a long time. She convinces me to get out and I run for the covers in the bedroom.
+ 4:45 After lying in bed for a while my trip starts to pick back up to where it was when I was on the couch. The room spins and wobbles around me. There is something strange on my feet. An explosion of confusion seems to be coming from the end of the bed. I look down and sure enough Allison is putting a pair of fuzzy blue socks on my feet. I writhe and protest but my feet wonít listen to me when I tell them to move. Once she has the socks on she tells me she is going to go make enchiladas. I want to go with her but I canít bring myself to get up. I slip back into a realm of colors and sounds for what seems to me like about an hour before Allison reenters the room and tells me that she wants my help. I rouse myself and proceed to the kitchen.
+ 5:00 Allison has already dirtied some more pots and pans beyond what I had used to make the tea. The kitchen reminds me of the Mad Hatter scene from Alice in Wonderland. The room seems to be full of bright colors, particularly blue and green. I decide that my hands need a place to live so I get my pants from the bathroom and put them on. Then I place my hands in the safety of my pockets. For a few minutes I stand swaggering and looking out the window while Allison clangs and bangs pots around. She is cooking surprisingly well for someone who is tripping. I try to cut up some olives for her, but I am unable to. My hand feels like it has lost connection with my arm. It is hard for me to judge movements and placement of any of my body parts. Thinking that this is not a good state in which to use a knife, I resort to a butter knife, and eventually just tearing the olives.
+ 5:15 We finish preparing the food and put it in the oven. Allison goes to sit on the couch and I follow suit. Both of us are exhausted and starving now. Neither of us has eaten since early afternoon when we decided to drink Ayahuasca. It seems like ages ago that we made that decision. Itís as if Iíve been stuck in my apartment for weeks on end with no connections to the outside world. The enchiladas finish baking but when they come out they do not smell appetizing in the least bit. I make Allison a piece of toast and then we decide to go to bed.
+ 5:30 I am not sure exactly why this is, but it seems like reclining makes my trip come back strong. As I lay in bed I began to hear noises again. They seemed to be floating around me and even through me occasionally. I canít help but start to move around again.
+ 7:00 I must have fallen asleep but I am unable to discern when exactly I fell asleep. I hear Allison throwing up in the trash can that I set beside the bed. I rub her back for a few minutes before drifting off again.
+ 10:30 I drop back down into real-world existence after dreams of flying through something that resembled the solar system. Every muscle in my body aches. My head hurts and I can feel the burning in my throat from the lime juice residue. Allison on the other hand wakes up feeling great. She is somewhat energetic and has a ready appetite. We go back to sleep for a few hours before getting up to start our day.
This was the most intense trip that Iíve ever had. I would do it again, but I need to make sure to exercise a little more caution. Whether or not my jaw actually went into hypertension I have still not fully determined. To me it seems unlikely that such localized trauma could occur but at the same time I have trouble finding any other explanation. I also need to stick to just one batch of Mimosa. Two glasses of it put me way over the top.
Experience Reports are the writings and opinions of the individual authors who submit them.
Some of the activities described are dangerous and/or illegal and none are recommended by Erowid.