Citation: Vortexdweller. "The Splatty Meltdown of Pharms: experience with Pharmaceuticals (Various) & Cannabis (ID 55586)". Erowid.org. Jul 27, 2007. erowid.org/exp/55586
Howdy, all. Until recently I had a friend who was always a bit edgy and hyper. He had a history of depression, panic attacks, agoraphobia, and issues with anger, but was otherwise a perfectly stable human being. His sense of humor, which was magnificent, made up for what was otherwise sometimes a very negative and self-indulgent personality.
I hadn't seen him in a few years and was planning to drive up North to interview for contract jobs and he generously offered to let me stay in his guest room. I foolishly take him up on this generous offer. I say foolishly, because the guy was on the verge of a complete meltdown.
The guy's a heavy-duty smoker and has been for as long as I've known him. Weed first thing in the morning, weed first thing when he gets home from work, weed all weekend. I'm 420-friendly, also imbibe, but let's face it, after awhile it's just a waste of time and weed.
And the same guy has also been taking a whole load of different pills, none of them legitimately prescribed for him. And what I consider truly unpleasant stuff like Ambien and Inderal. Also Ativan, which I won't say is unpleasant, but it is highly addictive and my friend was apparently strung out on the stuff and looked like someone going through benzo withdrawal. Having panic attacks, being agoraphobic, still smoking, though. I have a legit Rx for Valium and gave him a few to titrate down and take the edge off what looked to me like a textbook case of too-rapid benzo detox, although he insisted he 'hadn't been taking that much that often', and also recommended he lay off the smoke for awhile.
Meanwhile his buddy sends him a whole bunch more Ambien and Ativan and quite possibly additional pharms that were not mentioned to me. My friend also gets his mitts on more than 30 20 mg Inderal tablets. And the unraveling proceeds in earnest. He is taking this pill and that pill and combining pills 'to take the edge off' his nervousness. Every day. Since I could only spare a few Valium, he doesn't have access to this, although I later unhappily discovered, he had 'helped himself'. He was sneaking hits of grass when he sent me out to the grocery store because he said he was allegedly too tired or feeling too shaky to leave his house.
I'm at his house for less than a month. And he is by now just talkingamileaminute whenever he is at home and not letting me focus on things I need to do. Thoughtus Interruptus. None of the interviews have panned out for me. I cannot just sit and concentrate on technologies I need to learn while in the same house, this guy just won't shut up and insists I go everywhere with him and watch a bunch of really annoying television shows with him. When he's at work, I get to play 'gofer'. Long-range Thoughtus Interruptus. Then he starts complaining that he can't hear people when they speak. He begins moving his mouth strangely at times when I'm speaking with him and tells me 'he's having to read lips.'
And this is all too strange. Reluctantly, I finally tell him 'Something isn't right, here. I think you need to see a doctor. Please call and make an appointment.' He insists the problem is that he can't hear, so I find an audiologist in the Yellow Pages and he sets up an appointment to have his hearing tested. Of course, I volunteer to drive him into these appointments, as I'm now concerned about his ability to safely drive to the end of the block and back. And his mother emails me expressing concern about his state of mind. So the guy admits that yes, he probably does also needs to see his doctor and makes an appointment for Wednesday of the next week. Too little, too late.
On Saturday evening, I come in from doing hours of work on the guy's property. I get a glass of water and sit down at the table across from the guy. Guy starts calmly insisting that if *he* is going to see the doctor, then I should see him, too. I calmly point out the fact I've already got my own doctor who knows what's going on with me and all is cool. Guy gets this *furious* look on his face and starts STAMMERING. Can't get past the first word of sentences. I tell him it's okay, he just needs some food. I heat up some food. He does not eat. He just goes on and on and on with the stammering until he's now foaming at the mouth. And I'm desperately trying to appear unafraid and say 'Hey, I'm exhausted. I need to get some sleep. Probably you'll feel better if you get some sleep, too.' It's 2 AM by then.
At around 7:30 AM, I hear loud banging on the guest room door. I say 'I still need some sleep!' Guy bursts into the room all excited saying 'But you left me all these NICE NOTES.' Uh oh. 'What notes?' I ask. 'The ones you left on top of your laptop for me.' Major creeps now. I walk out, take one look and my heart drops into my Tevas. The guy had written this stack of notes *himself*! I tell him: 'THAT is not my handwriting, friend. That is YOUR handwriting. YOU wrote these notes!' And then I walk back into the guest room, close the door and burst into tears. This is not going to be a good day, this much is obvious.
Ten minutes later, sufficiently collected to face whatever is going on, I exit the guest room to find yet another note added to the pile, this one stating: 'Sorry! I did not sleep last night. I had a blackout this morning.' This is tremendously reassuring to me (NOT). The telephone rings. It is an ex-boyfriend of this guy saying 'Is he around? Can I talk to him?' And I say 'I think he's sleeping. At least I HOPE he's sleeping.' Ex-boyfriend begs me to check because he had a 'very disturbing phone call from him four days ago where he kept talkingamileaminute and bursting into tears without warning and he's worried that he may be suicidal.' I tell the ex that I'll check and things are not at all good. If I don't call him within the hour, would he please call back? He agrees and I knock on my friend's bedroom door.
My (once and former) friend is not asleep, but is curled in a fetal position in his bed. He is stammering. I ask if it's all right to sit on the edge of his bed and he shakes his head 'yes'. I tell him his ex has just called and is worried about him and would like to hear from him. ZAP! The guy begins screaming: 'I NEVER LOVED HIM! NEVER LOVED HIM! NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, NUH, NUH, NUH.' Now very angry and foaming at the mouth. He screams at me to get out of his room. I do so.
He then comes out of his room and stammers an apology. But he is clearly filled with rage. And I tell him: 'Hey. It's okay to feel angry.' Wrong thing to say. Guy picks up a high-beam flashlight and smashes it to bits on his dining room table. He begins screaming, falls to the floor, clutching his chest and again foaming at the mouth. I grab a 1 mg benzo from a bottle in my purse and I tell him 'take this. It will help calm you down pretty quickly.' He asks what it is and I tell him. He puts his arms down at his sides, sticks his tongue out like a baby bird and I place the pill on his tongue.
Phone rings. It is the ex calling back. Guy picks up the phone and in the calmest and most casual voice imaginable, says: 'Yes, this is he. I'm just fine, thank you.' Huh?!? I'm looking at the devastation he's wrought and I loudly ask: 'Why bother to lie? Things are NOT fine!' And the guy flings the phone across the room into a wall and goes back into stammer, scream, fetal and foam mode. I pick up the phone and ask 'Are you hearing this?' And the ex says 'Yes! He clearly needs to be in a hospital!' And I say: 'There is no way I can get him anywhere safely on my own.' Ex is not willing to come out to help because he fears making the situation worse. He tells me 'Good luck'. Thanks. I'm gonna need it.
Well, kids, to wrap this up this whole sad story, I am forced to call 1) the guy's mother. 2) The county police emergency number. 3) Give a statement and almost end up getting placed under arrest myself when this insane 'friend' accuses me of having assaulted him 'in his own home.' He asserts to the police that I SHOVED A PILL DOWN HIS THROAT(!) I am forced to explain precisely what happened. I tell the officer that I did this only because I feared this guy would have a heart attack or stroke and was hoping he would calm down sufficiently that I could transport him to a hospital. I do not even know if he actually swallowed the tablet, if he did, it would seem to have hardly had an effect on him.
Had it not been for the guy's inability to maintain a calm demeanor for more than about 30 seconds and lapsing back into the stammering and screaming and foaming mode, I might be writing this post from inside a jail cell. The guy's mother arrives and, at the time, was sensible enough to vouch for what I'd been saying about her son's behavior. And the police, noting the condition the guy was in, call in the EMTs. After about 45 minutes, the guy voluntarily leaves with the EMTs, while screaming in my direction, 'I WANT HER OUT OF MY HOUSE! GET HER OUT OF MY HOUSE! NOW!!'
I've never heard of a person becoming Schizophrenic at the age of 45, although I guess anything is possible. He was definitely psychotic and absolutely manic. When last heard from, the guy was blaming me for *everything* bad that had happened in his life. I lost a friend. A friend lost his mind, hopefully temporarily. It didn't have to come to this. For all I know, the extraordinary wit of this person is lost forever. I am sorry I didn't act more quickly to get help for this person. I am sorry I couldn't prevent him from scoring pills and herb. He is (or was) a grown man, in spite of behavior to the contrary.
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