I'm feeling quite strange today. The only caffeine I have had in the past three months constitutes a little bit of chocolate here and there. When I found out I was pregnant, I stopped my daily habit of downing 3-5 cups of coffee and drinking tea and soda as I pleased. But yesterday afternoon I decided that a Starbucks frozen Frappuchino was everything that I needed at that moment and so I gave in to my cravings, drove to the nearest corporate drive through and slurped one down in about 5 minutes.
About fifteen minutes later, my heart is beating out of my chest and my skin is crawling. My eyes feel as if they are popping out of my head. I think I am having an anxiety attack. I take silent deep breaths to try to calm myself. This intensity passes after about 45 minutes and I continue my afternoon with little more than heightened energy. When I finally lay in bed at night, I toss and turn for quite some time, trying to relax and then after somewhat falling into a hazy reality but not even close to REM, wide awake again at 2am and not able to sleep again until 4 and up at 7am once again, then trying in vain to get some resemblance of sleep and finally giving up and dealing with the day, part zombie, part coming down - speed freak. I honestly feel like I did a bunch of coke yesterday. Or maybe even Meth. I'm still wired. War on caffeine!!!!! Take note: I am an experienced drug user-everything from psychedelics to narcotics to speed and I now realize that without tolerance built up, caffeine can be just as intense!
